Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Ian Johnson (cricketer)

Ian Johnson (cricketer)

Nominator(s): Mattinbgn\^talk

• Featured article candidates/Ian Johnson (cricketer)

I believe this article—part of a Featured Topic drive focusing on the Australian cricket team in England in 1948—meets the featured article criteria. The article has had a peer review and is fully and widely referenced, comprehensive and written from a neutral point of view. This is a self-nomination. Mattinbgn\^talk 12:48, 4 July 2008 (UTC)

Comments - sources look good, links all checked out with the link checker tool. Ealdgyth - Talk 12:54, 4 July 2008 (UTC)

Comments

• "He captained the Australian team in 17 Tests, winning 7 and losing 5." - you should explain this, since what I first thought when seeing it was, "But 7+5=12, not 17." Are there draws?

• Yes, and now mentioned in the lead -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:32, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• "Despite this record, his term as national captain was best known for the loss..." -> "Despite this record he was best known as the captain who lost...", less confusing.

• A much better wording, thanks -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:32, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• "Johnson made his first-class cricket debut, aged 17, for Victoria in..." -> "Johnson made his first-class cricket debut at age 17 for Victoria in..."

• Agreed and changed -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:32, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• "The tour of the West Indies later that season was a cricketing and diplomatic triumph for Johnson; the Australians winning the series comfortably while avoiding the disturbances surrounding the visit to the islands by the English 12 months earlier." - this just sounds rather... awkward. Could you rephrase it?

• Reworded and, I hope, improved. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:50, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• "he retired from all forms of cricket aged 39." -> "he retired from all forms of cricket at age 39."

• Agreed and changed -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:32, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

Prose doesn't look bad in general. Nousernamesleft (talk) 16:59, 4 July 2008 (UTC)

Thank you. I would be interested in hearing further suggestions etc. if you have them. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:50, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Comment "Aged only 16, and still a schoolboy at Wesley College," → "16 years old and still a schoolboy at Wesley College,"? Gary King (talk) 17:26, 4 July 2008 (UTC)

• I don't really like starting a sentence with figures if I can avoid it. If you are still uncomfortable with the wording I will see what I can do. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 00:36, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

Ah yes, that is a very good point. It should be "Sixteen years old..."; and yeah, I feel uncomfortable specifically with "Aged only 16", which just doesn't sound very natural to me. Gary King (talk) 05:29, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

Comments - Will the cricket articles ever stop coming here? Until they do, I guess another review is in order.

• "with a firther 5 drawn." Typo.

• Only recently added, but should have been picked up. Thanks. -- Mattinbgn\^talk

• Test career, Debut and early Test career: "and the match was drawn; Johnson failing to take a wicket. This is awkward and I recommend changing to "failed to take a wicket." Works better with the semi-colon.

• Agreed and changed -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Bradman's Invincibles: "Johnson was one of Don Bradman's team touring England in 1948." I would put it as "Johnson was a member of...".

• Agreed and changed -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Decline in form: Why is The Ashes in italics here?

• They were all originally in italics but I was convinced by an earlier copy-editor they were unnecessary. It appears I missed plenty :-(. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• "Johnson had another lean series; taking only eight wickets at an average of 32.75." Change the semi-colon into a comma.

• Yep -- 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Captaincy, Selection: "cricket establishment; an alumnus..." Try cricket establishment; he was an alumnus...".

• Much better, thanks -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Ashes defeat: Ashes in italics again. I haven't seen this in the other cricket articles I've looked at.

• See above -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• during the match, however..." I would prefer a semi-colon here.

• Agreed and done -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

• Caribbean success: "With the "White Australian policy" in place at time." At the time.

• Oops, thanks. -- Mattinbgn\^talk

• Johnson cultivated an relaxed manner with the locals" Typo an→a.

• Fixed now, thanks. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

It's a very good piece, but I am finding some punctuation oddities. It wouldn't hurt to have someone do a quick check for more. Giants2008 (talk) 01:24, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

Thanks, I will see who I can find. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 01:56, 5 July 2008 (UTC)

Comments by User:Dweller

• I find his batting record so sub-mediocre that I'm questioning the description of him as a "bowling all-rounder". In 1st class cricket he barely broke 20 as an average and in Tests it was below 20. 2 hundreds in nearly 200 matches; even allowing for the lower scores of his era, I think that's a generous and POV description. The fact that he played most innings at number 8 in the order and had most success at 8 and 10 (see Stats Guru) seems to back up my assertion.
• More POV alert (or OR) "Despite this record, he is best known as the captain who lost consecutive Ashes series against England." Unsourced - and there's no legacy section where such a claim could be discussed and reffed.
• "He would not play first-class cricket again for three years". Presumably because he was deemed not good enough, but to avoid OR, do you have a source?

• Tasmania were not a Sheffield Shield team until 1977 and for most of their history they were substantially weaker than the other f-c teams. Because of this, the matches were often used to trial young cricketers and to give them some encouragement and contact with the experienced team members. This would be similar to the practise of the English Counties in matches against the University teams. Johnson was only a schoolboy, albeit a very promising one, but with family connections in high places. It is not unreasonable to suppose he was given an early opportunity that he would not have been given had the matches counted toward the Sheffield Shield. Note this is all speculation and unsourced and can't be included in the article. What I could say is something along the lines, "Johnson was given an opportunity to play first-class cricket while still a schoolboy, against Tasmania, in a non-Sheffield Shield match" or some such. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 22:44, 9 July 2008 (UTC)

• "He secured his place in the Victorian team in the 1939–40 season" Parag is already talking about that season? Did those performances secure the place? Puzzled.
• "making his Sheffield Shield debut against South Australia in Adelaide in November 1939" He's already played 4 1st class matches. Were they not Shield games? Specify.

As above, Tasmania did not compete in the Sheffield Shield until 1977. In a real sense, his Sheffield Shield debut is his first real entry into meaningful high class cricket I am not sure how you want me to be more specific. The sentence seems clear to me; "making his Sheffield Shield debut". Can you clarify please? -- Mattinbgn\^talk 22:44, 9 July 2008 (UTC)

Still working on it. --Dweller (talk) 10:24, 9 July 2008 (UTC)

Thanks for the insightful comments and copy-edit to date. -- Mattinbgn\^talk 22:44, 9 July 2008 (UTC)