Template:Did you know nominations/Robert A. Brooks: Difference between revisions
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:::* (additional note) I've added an image to the article, which we could probably add to the DYK. Would you be open to that? |
:::* (additional note) I've added an image to the article, which we could probably add to the DYK. Would you be open to that? |
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::: Thanks, --[[User:Elonka|El]][[User talk:Elonka|on]][[Special:Contributions/Elonka|ka]] 02:34, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
::: Thanks, --[[User:Elonka|El]][[User talk:Elonka|on]][[Special:Contributions/Elonka|ka]] 02:34, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
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* '''ALT1''': ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur '''[[Robert A. Brooks]]''' built his corporate headquarters (pictured) in [[St. Louis]], the building's windows spelled out the name of the company in [[Morse code]]? [[User:Elonka|El]][[User talk:Elonka|on]][[Special:Contributions/Elonka|ka]] 03:32, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
* '''ALT1''': ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur '''[[Robert A. Brooks]]''' built his corporate headquarters ''(pictured)'' in [[St. Louis]], the building's windows spelled out the name of the company in [[Morse code]]? [[User:Elonka|El]][[User talk:Elonka|on]][[Special:Contributions/Elonka|ka]] 03:32, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:0.5em;"> |
<div style="float:right;margin-left:0.5em;"> |
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[[File:BFP_Morse_windows.JPG|100x100px|Windows in a Morse code pattern]] |
[[File:BFP_Morse_windows.JPG|100x100px|Windows in a Morse code pattern]] |
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</div> |
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* '''ALT2''': ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur '''[[Robert A. Brooks]]''' had his corporate headquarters ''(pictured)'' built in [[St. Louis]], the arrangement of windows spelled out the company's name in [[Morse code]]? |
* '''ALT2''': ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur '''[[Robert A. Brooks]]''' had his corporate headquarters ''(pictured)'' built in [[St. Louis]], the arrangement of windows spelled out the company's name in [[Morse code]]? |
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:* Thanks for doing the QPQ, but you also need to check for paraphrasing/copyvio, regardless of it passing GA. I've tweaked your ALT1 to create an ALT2, which I feel is clearer. I think you need to reword that sentence, and your seeming reluctance might suggest that there may be other paraphrasing/copyvio issues. Is it possible to find an online source for the frist source, his obituary, as it cited seven times? I'm not sure if the image licence is suitable for it to appear on the front page. [[User:Edwardx|Edwardx]] ([[User talk:Edwardx|talk]]) 18:15, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
:* Thanks for doing the QPQ, but you also need to check for paraphrasing/copyvio, regardless of it passing GA. I've tweaked your ALT1 to create an ALT2, which I feel is clearer. I think you need to reword that sentence, and your seeming reluctance might suggest that there may be other paraphrasing/copyvio issues. Is it possible to find an online source for the frist source, his obituary, as it cited seven times? I'm not sure if the image licence is suitable for it to appear on the front page. [[User:Edwardx|Edwardx]] ([[User talk:Edwardx|talk]]) 18:15, 27 July 2014 (UTC) |
Revision as of 21:34, 10 August 2014
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Robert A. Brooks
- ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur Robert A. Brooks built his corporate headquarters in St. Louis, he spelled out the company’s name in Morse code through the shapes of the windows?
- Reviewed: Edward Porter Alexander
Created by Elonka (talk). Self nominated at 15:17, 26 July 2014 (UTC).
- New enough. Long enough. Hook tweaked - subject must be in bold. Article appears well cited. The hook idea is good, but the hook does not quite match up with the article itself, "the building featured the company's name spelled out in morse code in the southern facade of the windows", and the second ref (first one does not mention Morse Code) states "a fenestration pattern spells out the name of the company in Morse code". QPQ needed. Dup detector shows up close paraphrasing such as "cencom cable associates and brooks fiber properties both of which were sold for billions of dollars in" compared to "cencom cable associates and brooks fiber properties two companies that he sold for billions of dollars in" in ref 1. I don't understand why there are seven bare URLs at the end of the References section? Edwardx (talk) 00:29, 27 July 2014 (UTC)
- That was quick! Thanks for the review. To answer your questions:
- Fenestration pattern means "arrangement of windows across the facade of a building". I chose a more common-language interpretation of this. I also added another source (Post-Dispatch) with simpler wording, "the windows in the back spell out ..." but if you'd like to rework the hook, I'm open to that?
- For the dup detector, I think the sentence is okay as-is, but am open to suggestions if you feel strongly that it should be reworded.
- For the bare URLs, that was just because the article was in-process. They have been fixed. :)
QPQ in-process, I haven't forgotten!QPQ done: Edward Porter Alexander. --Elonka 04:11, 27 July 2014 (UTC)- (additional note) I've added an image to the article, which we could probably add to the DYK. Would you be open to that?
- Thanks, --Elonka 02:34, 27 July 2014 (UTC)
- ALT1: ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur Robert A. Brooks built his corporate headquarters (pictured) in St. Louis, the building's windows spelled out the name of the company in Morse code? Elonka 03:32, 27 July 2014 (UTC)
- ALT2: ... that when telecommunications entrepreneur Robert A. Brooks had his corporate headquarters (pictured) built in St. Louis, the arrangement of windows spelled out the company's name in Morse code?
- Thanks for doing the QPQ, but you also need to check for paraphrasing/copyvio, regardless of it passing GA. I've tweaked your ALT1 to create an ALT2, which I feel is clearer. I think you need to reword that sentence, and your seeming reluctance might suggest that there may be other paraphrasing/copyvio issues. Is it possible to find an online source for the frist source, his obituary, as it cited seven times? I'm not sure if the image licence is suitable for it to appear on the front page. Edwardx (talk) 18:15, 27 July 2014 (UTC)
- Regarding the image, it is freely licensed, relevant, and already in the article. It appears to comply with everything at Wikipedia:Did you know#Images?
- Regarding the cited obituary, I'm not aware of any freely available online version, but there are some behind registration, such as here.[1] I found a copy through Newsbank, if you have access to a library database, or I can email you a copy if you want.
- Regarding the challenged sentence, I reworded the lead paragraph a bit.
- Thanks for the suggestion of alternate hook, ALT2 is fine with me. --Elonka 20:52, 27 July 2014 (UTC)
- Thanks. Agreed, the image is fine for the front page. As for the obit, I found a free one in under a minute, and have added the URL to your reference. Dup detector: WP article and obit compared raises copyvio issues such as "a founding director of onecomm communications which later became part of nextel communications" which is identical to the source. My earlier concerns were justified, and I think you need to go through the whole article checking for copyvio/close paraphrasing. Edwardx (talk) 10:20, 29 July 2014 (UTC)
- Thanks for the link. I have reviewed the dup detector's list, but I'm not seeing any copyvio issues. Regarding the Onecomm sentence, it would seem to fall under WP:LIMITED. I checked several sources and they were all stating the OneComm involvement in pretty much the same way.[2] It's not a crucial fact for the article, so I just went ahead and deleted the sentence. Will that be sufficient to clear the article for DYK? --Elonka 01:44, 30 July 2014 (UTC)