Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Red-backed Fairy-wren: Difference between revisions
m OK Giggy, happy with this? |
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That's just from the lead. ''[[user:giggy|giggy]]'' <sub>([[user talk:giggy|:O]])</sub> 10:42, 18 June 2008 (UTC) |
That's just from the lead. ''[[user:giggy|giggy]]'' <sub>([[user talk:giggy|:O]])</sub> 10:42, 18 June 2008 (UTC) |
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::<s>Right, you'll get yours</s> thankyou for the constructive comments, keep 'em coming. Cheers, [[User:Casliber|Casliber]] ([[User talk:Casliber|talk]] '''·''' [[Special:Contributions/Casliber|contribs]]) 13:01, 18 June 2008 (UTC) |
::<s>Right, you'll get yours</s> thankyou for the constructive comments, keep 'em coming. Cheers, [[User:Casliber|Casliber]] ([[User talk:Casliber|talk]] '''·''' [[Special:Contributions/Casliber|contribs]]) 13:01, 18 June 2008 (UTC) |
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*'''comment''' Interesting read, nice range map ;), couple of items [[User:Gnangarra|Gnan]][[User_talk:Gnangarra|garra]] 10:23, 19 June 2008 (UTC) |
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:#the lead with two long paras maybe break it into 3 or 4 for ease of reading. |
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:#this subspecies section, ''hybrid from a broad hybrid zone in North Queensland. Here, in an area bounded by the Burdekin,'' is difficult prose also the sentence starting ''Here'' has 6 comma's? |
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:#Also in the predator section why no taxonomical name on goannas when when all other identified predators are? |
Revision as of 10:23, 19 June 2008
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I'm nominating this article for featured article because I feel it meets the criteria. As far as I know, I have scoured all published material so it meets comprehensiveness. I feel the prose has been massaged to a point that it is the equal of other Featured Articles, the image has a suitable licence and the referencing is formatted correctly. I will attempt to address any issues highlighted. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 05:52, 16 June 2008 (UTC)
Comments
Current ref 20 Webster, MS Varian CW et al is lacking a journal title, and page numbers and volume and issue number
- Otherwise sources look good. Links all checked out with the link checker tool. Ealdgyth - Talk 13:41, 16 June 2008 (UTC)
- Got it. Some formatting glitches. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 13:59, 16 June 2008 (UTC)
- Comment Remove extra spaces before references per WP:FOOTNOTE, such as at "hatching. [23]" and "hatchlings. [23] Adults". Gary King (talk) 15:22, 16 June 2008 (UTC)
- I fixed these, couldn't see any others jimfbleak (talk) 16:44, 16 June 2008 (UTC)
- Support
Comment(note that I reviewed this at GA, so possible CoI)
Two alongs and two brightly coloured in the opening sentence (done both)preferring moist grassy areas. It prefers wet, grassy tropical or sub-tropical areas more repetition(gosh, how did I miss that one? done)- It is sedentary and locally nomadic, and leaves its territory after breeding season. This is confusing, nomadic, leaves territory, but sedentary?? (tricky - the point i am trying to make is that the species doesn't migrate as such, but that large changes in vegetation cover by season and bushfire cause it to be locally nomadic (move around a bit) in northern Australia, often after breeding. You're welcome to have a play to word it beter or I can tweak later if yuo still find it clunky. either way is cool)
- Have a look and see if you are happy with tweak jimfbleak (talk) 10:19, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
- Yes - describes it exactly. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 10:23, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
- Have a look and see if you are happy with tweak jimfbleak (talk) 10:19, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
IUCN species page shouldn't be an external link since it is also used as a reference.(done)
- "in the fairy-wren family Maluridae." - could this be reworded... perhaps "in the Maluridae family of fairy-wrens"?
(This is the sort of thing that has yo-yo'ed back and forth. Essentially, the Fairy-wren family is the Maluridae and vice versa. I have had it the other way (i.e. the Maluridae fairy-wren family) and been asked to swap it to this way. Saying it over in my head a few times I feel it is emphasised better this way, in essence saying "fairy-wren family (which is known as) Maluridae" )
- Hmm... I dunno, it's not as clear to me (or someone who's never heard of Maluridae, etc.) this way. Perhaps if you use a few more words to make it clear that fairy-wren is Maluridae? I dunno... I'm just not a fan of the current wording. giggy (:O) 23:35, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
- OK, it is worded as simply Maluridae family in 3 other FAs, so I have left it like that as fairy-wren can be linked a bit further down. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 02:21, 19 June 2008 (UTC)
- "It is endemic to Australia and can be found near rivers and coastal areas along the northern and eastern coastlines of Australia" - the 2nd Australia could be "the country" or something like that.
- (Actually easier just to remove that 2nd one. How'd I miss that one?)
That's just from the lead. giggy (:O) 10:42, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
Right, you'll get yoursthankyou for the constructive comments, keep 'em coming. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 13:01, 18 June 2008 (UTC)
- comment Interesting read, nice range map ;), couple of items Gnangarra 10:23, 19 June 2008 (UTC)
- the lead with two long paras maybe break it into 3 or 4 for ease of reading.
- this subspecies section, hybrid from a broad hybrid zone in North Queensland. Here, in an area bounded by the Burdekin, is difficult prose also the sentence starting Here has 6 comma's?
- Also in the predator section why no taxonomical name on goannas when when all other identified predators are?