Talk:Ronnie Wallwork/GA1: Difference between revisions

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GA Review

I'll be reviewing this article at some point today, any additional comments from other reviewers are welcome. -AMBerry (t|c) 12:37, 7 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Lead:

"United loaned out Wallwork to Carlisle United, Stockport County and Royal Antwerp." sounds a bit choppy to me, possibly link this sentence to the following one (i.e. ...Royal Antwerp, where he was banned from football...)?
- Amended this one. Peanut4 (talk) 20:11, 8 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Manchester United

The opening sentence on Wallwork's loan spell at Antwerp could possibly do with rephrasing, at the moment it doesn't quite sound right.

West Bromwich Albion

"The move [to Huddersfield] was prompted by Town's escalating injury crisis." Is there a source for this statement?
- Good question. The only sources I can find [1] and [2] suggest he was brought in for his experience. I'll wait for User:Jameboy, the original nominator, to see what he thinks. Peanut4 (talk) 20:11, 8 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I've removed the sentence. An article on the Huddersfield Town site mentions a couple of players suffering from "illness", which is a bit non-descript. However it is just one of several loan spells he completed and the reasons aren't particularly important IMO. If you disagree then I'll happily pop in a quote from (Huddersfield manager) Andy Ritchie, mentioning (as Peanut4 says) Wallwork's experience. --Jameboy (talk) 22:32, 8 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Apart from those points above I can't see anything that would prevent GA, so it's on hold for now. -AMBerry (t|c) 19:36, 8 September 2008 (UTC)[reply]

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 *"The move [to Huddersfield] was prompted by Town's escalating injury crisis." Is there a source for this statement?
 **Good question. The only sources I can find [http://www.examiner.co.uk/huddersfield-town-fc/huddersfield-town-news/2007/09/27/ron-s-loan-86081-19855603/] and [http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/h/huddersfield_town/7016808.stm] suggest he was brought in for his experience. I'll wait for [[User:Jameboy]], the original nominator, to see what he thinks. [[User:Peanut4|Peanut4]] ([[User talk:Peanut4|talk]]) 20:11, 8 September 2008 (UTC)
+::I've removed the sentence. [http://www.htafc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10312~1121542,00.html An article on the Huddersfield Town site] mentions a couple of players suffering from "illness", which is a bit non-descript. However it is just one of several loan spells he completed and the reasons aren't particularly important IMO. If you disagree then I'll happily pop in a quote from (Huddersfield manager) Andy Ritchie, mentioning (as Peanut4 says) Wallwork's experience. --[[User:Jameboy|Jameboy]] ([[User talk:Jameboy|talk]]) 22:32, 8 September 2008 (UTC)
 Apart from those points above I can't see anything that would prevent GA, so it's on hold for now. -[[User:AMBerry|AMBerry]] <small>([[User_talk:AMBerry|t]]|[[Special:Contributions/AMBerry|c]])</small> 19:36, 8 September 2008 (UTC)