Wikipedia:Requests for feedback

"WP:FEED" redirects here. For the essay on vandalism, see Wikipedia:Deny recognition. For RSS and Atom feeds, see Wikipedia:Syndication. For the page rating system, see Wikipedia:Article Feedback Tool.

Requests for Feedback

This page provides comments and constructive criticism about articles that you have drafted, created, or substantially changed. This is not a general help page. To seek assistance or ask a question, see Wikipedia:Questions. If you are seeking an outside opinion about a dispute, please follow the steps in Wikipedia:Dispute resolution. Please note that this page is patrolled by volunteer editors just like you and it may take several days to review your request.

Before you request feedback

There are certain things which come up again and again so it may help if you deal with them before requesting feedback: Does your article have reliable sources? These are important in terms of both verifiability and notability. Do you have a conflict of interest that may harm your ability to produce a neutral article? If you would like a beginner's guide to these sorts of issues, take a look at the article wizard. If you are unsure about how to edit Wikipedia articles, take a look at this tutorial. For a more general discussion of writing your first article, see "Your first article".

How to post a request

Place a Wikilink, with the title of the page inside [[ and ]] - for example, [[User:Example/Lipsum]] or [[Cats]] - in the box below. Click Click To Add Request In the new article, Write a brief summary of your work or what in particular you need help with, but do not post the whole article here. If you have rewritten an existing article, you may wish to provide a diff link from that article's history that shows your changes. Check regularly for responses to your request; they will most often be made here. ↓ Post your request using the box below. Replace "Untitled" with a wikilink to your article - e.g. [[User:Example/Lipsum]] or [[Cats]] ↓

After Receiving Feedback

Check back here often, as you will receive a response here. Respond to the feedback, either with a simple thank you, to ask for help with anything mentioned, or, after you've made some of the improvements, what they think of them. Consider helping out here in the future - anyone can read up on what articles should be like and provide constructive criticism.

Are you providing feedback?

Please consider notifying the user whose article you are providing feedback for by placing a message on their talk page, so they will be able to read it in a timely manner and reply if necessary. You can use.. {{Feedbackreply-sm}} A template asking the user to check back here and consider responding {{Feedbackreply-alt}} A more personal version of the first offering your help with developing, moving to mainspace, etc.

(For help, see Wikipedia:Purge)

The previous few days of requests are transcluded below. The pages for the past 20 days are: ()

• December 15
• December 16
• December 17
• December 18
• December 19
• December 20
• December 21
• December 22
• December 23
• December 24
• December 25
• December 26
• December 27
• December 28
• December 29
• December 30
• December 31
• January 1
• January 2
• January 3

Index of all requests for feedback

Most Worshipful Prince Hall Grand Lodge of Georgia

Most Worshipful Prince Hall Grand Lodge of Georgia —Preceding unsigned comment added by Jsnow1 (talk • contribs) 15:00, 29 December 2009 (UTC)

At the moment the tone is not appropriate. It reads like a research paper or essay, not an encyclopedic article. I would suggest that you read articles about other Lodges and see how they are laid out and formatted. It also looks like you have extracted a lot of the source material into the article rather than citing it. Please take a look at WP:CITE for help with citing sources. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 18:33, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Sinus Dynamics

User:JillianHerbert/Sinus Dynamics

This page was drafted to provide information about sinus dynamics. It basically contains general information about the program and a description of the equipment. I plan to add more to it, but for now, I'd like to review feedbacks so I know how to proceed further. --JillianHerbert (talk) 22:55, 30 December 2009 (UTC)

Hi JillianHerbert. The current version is sourced only to press releases and the subject's own website. What is required for both verifiability (WP:V) and notability (WP:N) is independent third-party coverage. ^Bongo_matic 23:08, 30 December 2009 (UTC)

Request feedback on additional reference/source —Preceding unsigned comment added by JillianHerbert (talk • contribs) 06:10, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

Please also take a look at WP:SPAM. At the moment the article reads like a doctor handout. The additional references may help with the notability issue, but they need to be cited in-line, please take a look at WP:CITE for assistance. – ukexpat (talk) 16:45, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis

User:Stefanir/Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis

The Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis is a leading research center at the University of Southern California.

Stefanir (talk) 01:03, 11 January 2010 (UTC)

At the moment the references do not demonstrate why the subject is notable per Wikipedia's general notability guideline. You will need to find reliable sources that provide significant coverage of the subject. – ukexpat (talk) 20:44, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Georgesh1/Heroes In the Sky (game)

Hello. I am looking for a friendly user who would like to look at my draft that I created. It is about a computer game. The draft page is there as a link. Any inputs, additions, and a little bit of deletion would be welcome.Georgesh1 (talk) 3:39, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

You will need to find a few more reliable sources to demonstrate the notability of the game per WP:N. Significant coverage is required and the current single source is not sufficient. – ukexpat (talk) 21:35, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Chris Kovarik

I have juts written my first article on Austrialian mountain bike legend Chris Kovarik and would appreciate any opinions/feeds back on the article. You can find it in my userspace here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:TinaEPO/Chris_Kovarik —Preceding unsigned comment added by TinaEPO (talk • contribs) 15:54, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

The article is at the moment completely unsourced. You will need to add some references to reliable sources to demonstrate the subject's notability per WP:ATHLETE. I have tagged the article accordingly. – ukexpat (talk) 22:03, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

LocalEats

Summary of new article: Description of website/smartphone app/book series LocalEats, published by Where The Locals Eat.

This is my first article, so any advice is very much welcome! Thanks.

Cathrjohnson —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cathrjohnson (talk • contribs) 17:57, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

It reads like an advertisement--if you could flesh it out with some additional references that would be helpful. But you do have I think enough decent references for notability. Nuujinn (talk) 12:39, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Bert Morgan

Bert Morgan Bert MorganGrandcraft (talk) 21:29, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

Sorry for the delay. I have reviewed and tagged the article with a couple of "issues" tags. The main problem is references - we need more, in-line, citations to demonstrate the subject's notability per WP:BIO. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 20:04, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

George T. Heery

This is the first full article I've written and wanted to open this up for review. The subject is George_T._Heery, a famous American architect who is most notable for his contributions to the foundation of the Construction Program Management industry. Regarding notability, Heery's first firm Heery International, is an internationally known company and Heery is widely known throughout the design and construction industry. I am continuing to do research to improve the article but felt that the article has reached a point where it might be ready for moving to main space soon. The one outstanding item I've marked for citation is the number of construction projects executed using a particular delivery method developed by the subject; I'm awaiting information from the General Services Adminstration, which apparently uses this process quite often. If I cannot locate information which can be cited to support that number I think that the sentence should be removed. Look forward to your help! --Drewprops (talk) 22:09, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

Update: I've gone ahead and moved the article into mainspace and have updated the link here to point to that article. Look forward to help with reviewing the article!--Drewprops (talk) 18:43, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

The National Institute for Metalworking Skills

User:Nims22030/new NIMS - — Preceding unsigned comment added by Nims22030 (talk • contribs)

There are a couple of major problems with the draft as it stands now. First, it does not have any references to reliable sources demonstrating how or why the subject meets the notability guidelines set out at WP:ORG; second, it is rather promotional in tone (see WP:SPAM) and will need to be toned down before moving to the mainspace. – ukexpat (talk) 18:51, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Draft article

The National Institute for Metalworking Skills (NIMS) was formed in 1995 by the metalworking trade associations to develop and maintain globally competitive American workforce. NIMS sets skills standards for the industry, certifies individual skills against the standards and accredits training programs that meet NIMS quality requirements. NIMS operates under rigorous and highly disciplined processes as the only developer of American National Standards for the nation’s metalworking industry accredited by the American National Standards Institute (ANSI). NIMS Stakeholders NIMS has a stakeholder base of over 6,000 metalworking companies. The major trade associations in the industry- the Association for Manufacturing Technology, the American Machine Tool Distributors' Association, the National Tooling & Machining Association, the Precision Machine Products Association, the Precision Metalforming Association, and the Tooling and Manufacturing Association have invested over $7.5 million in private funds for the development of the NIMS standards and its credentials. The associations also contribute annually to sustain NIMS operations and are committed to the upgrading and maintenance of the standards. NIMS Program Accreditation NIMS accredits training programs that meet its quality requirements. The NIMS accreditation requirements include an on-site audit and evaluation by a NIMS industry team that reviews and conducts on-site inspections of all aspects of the training programs, including administrative support, curriculum, plant, equipment and tooling, student and trainee progress, industry involvement, instructor qualifications and safety. Officials governing NIMS accredited programs report annually on progress and are subject to re-accreditation on a five year cycle. As of December 31, 2006 there were 162 NIMS accredited programs in operation. An additional 86 institutions and firms were in the process of completing the accreditation process. There are 105 certified NIMS Team Leaders from private industry who lead the on-site audits. NIMS Competency-based Apprenticeship System NIMS has launched a new Competency-based Apprenticeship System for the nation’s metalworking industry. The NIMS system represents a dramatic departure from the time based system and integrates the NIMS national standards and skill certifications in defining and measuring required competencies. Developed in partnership with the United States Department of Labor, the new system is the result of two years of work. Over 300 companies participated in the deliberations and design. The new National Guideline Standards for NIMS Competency-based Apprenticeship have been approved by the Department of Labor. NIMS has trained Department of Labor apprenticeship staff at the national and state level in the new system. Governance NIMS is governed by a 24 person Board of Directors, the majority of whom are metalworking company executives. The Board also has representatives from training institutions, education, state government and organized labor. NIMS financial operations are audited and reported annually in accordance with the Office of Management and Budget Circular A-133 and the provisions of the Single Audit Act. Homepage: http://www.nims-skills.org FAQs: https://www.nims-skills.org/web/nims/39 [[Category:Articles created via the Article Wizard]]

FAT TONE

(FAT TONE User:Originalrecordz/Fat-Tone)

17:48, 27 January 2010 (UTC)BiggKhrisco (talk)

Navy Hospital Charleston History

Navy Hospital Charleston History User:Garyrg398/Navy_Hospital_Charleston_History Garyrg398 (talk) 18:54, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

Looks pretty good. I moved the article to History of the Naval Health Clinic Charleston, but because it is not just about the history, it should probably be moved again to Naval Health Clinic Charleston. I have done quite a lot of reformatting per WP:MOS and WP:LAYOUT. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 20:12, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Cambridge Innovation Center (CIC)

User:CambridgeQueen/Sandbox Cambridge Innovation Center

CambridgeQueen (talk) 17:46, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

First_Unitarian_Church_of_Memphis

Please review my Wikipedia article; this is the first one I have ever created. Thank you very much.

First Unitarian Church of Memphis

User:RoseyCat/First Unitarian Church of Memphis

RoseyCat (talk) 22:23, 29 January 2010 (UTC)16:21, 29 January 2010 (CST)

I'm new at this, but I think if you drop the "we" and put it all in third person, and get references from outside of wikipedia, you're off to a good start. Where you have references to wikipedia, use the internal link format using brackets, but you need some verifiable sources from newspapers, books, and the like. Nice start! Nuujinn (talk) 02:25, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

I believe that I made the recommended changes. However, I am uncertain about the formatting of my reference and hope that it is correct.RoseyCat (talk) 00:27, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

Good improvements! I took the liberty of working on the references in the first couple of paragraphs, and editing the external links. For internal references to wikipedia, just put the article name in double brackets, and if that doesn't work in the flow of the paragraph, use a bar to separate the article name and the text you'd like to appear, eg." Cats are popular pets." For links to outside sources, see WP:cite, but I put in an example for you. Hope that helps, Nuujinn (talk) 12:07, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Blufeld

Helo everyone, I have just completed an article on an artist named Blufeld (David Hearn) and would appreciate your judgement and feedback on its content and layout. Thank you for your time!

Best Regards, Diana Bauer —Preceding unsigned comment added by Illumini08 (talk • contribs) 23:11, 29 January 2010 (UTC)

Memorial Laws: Laws Dedicated to the Memory of a Victim

Draft text added by Fleibman (talk • contribs) 20:25, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Moved to user subpage: User:Fleibman/Memorial Laws. – ukexpat (talk) 20:29, 30 January 2010 (UTC)

Lindsay Vickery

Lindsay Vickery

Requesting review of the entry on the Australian composer Lindsay Vickery 124.182.21.77 (talk) 08:18, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

Russian battleship Sevastopol (1895)

Just want to see what needs to be done to improve this before CSD can be survived. Have already added infobox based on User:Sturmvogel 66's comment. User:Buggie111/ Russian battleship Sevastopol (1895) Buggie111 (talk) 16:36, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

Oh, it should be 1892, not 95 Buggie111 (talk) 00:19, 1 February 2010 (UTC)

Sherif Sonbol

Sherif Sonbol (Egyptian photographer). Someone else already did a small article in German, so I've been working in the English version and would appreciate someone's opinion to see if I can put this one on up.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Welle_1/Sherif_Sonbol

Thanks, --Welle 1 (talk) 20:51, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

The career section is problematic, that kind of details is not needed nor suitable for Wikipedia. You should avoid words like Unfortunately, and sentences like "he managed to shake the foundations of Egyptian interior photography". See WP:Peacock. Sole Soul (talk) 22:43, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

Thanks will work on it. Will try to re-locate and add some of the Arabic original references (like the interior photography comment). —Preceding unsigned comment added by Welle 1 (talk • contribs) 20:21, 5 February 2010 (UTC)

DarkSpace

I have done extensive copyediting for the article DarkSpace and added over 30 references. The article still needs a few more sources, some copyediting, and maybe an image or two. (large diff link) Any feedback on what else it needs would be appreciated. Thanks! --Culix (talk) 05:00, 2 February 2010 (UTC)

Looks good, nice work! – ukexpat (talk) 20:28, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Lily Adamczyk

HI, I am trying to write about the Artist Lily Adamczyk and I could use some feedback please. I would also like help posting some of her pictures into the article. This is my very first article.

Thanks Oils4you (talk) 21:51, 2 February 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Oils4you (talk • contribs) 08:30, 2 February 2010 (UTC)

Brand Tribalism

Hi I have added more relevant citations for your approval. The article is called Brand Tribalism

Thanks you.

Jozette Heerman (talk) 12:12, 2 February 2010 (UTC)

Portofino framework

I wrote a new article about the Portofino framework. It is currently under my personal page and available for your review.

Portofino is an open-source web application framework written in Java and based on model-driven engineering. It was already mentioned by others in Model-driven engineering, Commercial open source applications, Domain-driven design and Metamodeling, often as "ManyDesigns Portofino".

Predonzani (talk) 10:58, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

Liberty Island

Liberty Island expanded and re-organized articleDjflem (talk) 14:14, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

Aage Giodesen

Aage_Giodesen Article is about the Danish artist Aage Giodesen with a number of references, and includes an example of his work from Wikimedia. --whb123 (talk) 15:05, 3 February 2010 (UTC)Whbonney 2/3/10

Skirmish Paintball

I am requesting feedback for Skirmish Paintball

Skirmish paintball is one of the leading Paintball Networks across the UK, providing thousands and thousands of customers with paintball games across the UK, and so far there is no mention of it on Wikipedia.

Chriscollins405 (talk) 16:12, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

LindaFowler/Princeton Symphony Orchestra

Dear Wikipedia editors:

Would you kindly review the following draft for Princeton Symphony Orchestra? Many thanks and best,

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Lindafowler/The_Princeton_Symphony_Orchestra

Lindafowler (talk) 18:47, 3 February 2010 (UTC)Linda Fowler 2/3/10

Enviralment

User:Weemz/Enviralment

Hello, I'm a new member to Wikipedia and this is my first of hopefully many submissions. I figured I would start with something small and easy like the site Enviralment to ensure that I get the submission process down pat before moving on to bigger and lengthier submissions. The work I'm submitting is a Canadian blog called Enviralment, which is similar to Small Dead Animals and others of that ilk. It has been featured on some predominant Canadian sites, most notably The Green Party of Canada.

I would appreciate some feedback and opinions on my first submission.

Thanks you.

--Weemz (talk) 19:30, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

Mark Collard

I've posted this article about User:In2play/Mark Collard who has been instrumental in popularising and developing the field of adventure education in Australia. He has also written 3 top-selling texts in regards activities used in the field. This is only a start, and I am still looking for more sources to add further information about his accomplishments over the past 20 years. I'm looking for feedback, as this is my first Wikipedia article contribution.

I woudl liek to get some feedback about how to create those boxes which appear in top right-hand side which give vital stats, such as DOB, spouse, kids, etc.

cheers, Will 4 Feb 2010 In2play (talk) 01:55, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

Granary Buildings, Leeds

Granary Buildings, Leeds

Any feedback on this article would be welcome.

This is an important, historic building but there doesn't seem to be any mention of it in the Leeds and Liverpool Canal or Architecture of Leeds articles.

EricPolymath (talk) 09:30, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

Playground (2009 film)

I would appreciate a review of an article on the documentary, Playground, (2009 film) User:Ekso8/Playground (2009 film) which focuses on the child sex trade in the United States and was released last year. The film was directed by Libby Spears and its executive producers include George Clooney, Grant Heslov and Steven Soderbergh.

Ekso8 (talk) 18:42, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

Raptor Conservation

Hello!

I submitted an article about Raptor Conservation concerns as a Conservation Biology class project. Would you please give me some feedback so that I may be rid of the notation above the article?

Thanks!

Mikayla Boche 24.119.206.106 (talk) 05:11, 6 February 2010 (UTC)

Nice work! I have reviewed and made a few, very minor formatting edits. – ukexpat (talk) 20:47, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Xena: Warrior Princess

Xena: Warrior Princess. Touchy article, with strong and differing opinions. I have recently restructured it, improved style, added bits. Require general feedback on how to improve it further, for self and others who regularly patrol it. Would like reclassification to C/B class if appropriate. Bards (talk) 16:11, 6 February 2010 (UTC)

Commotio

Looking for initial feedback, please - first Wiki contribution. Thank you. OxfordSinger (talk) 16:54, 6 February 2010 (UTC)

P.T. Barnum Awards

P.T. Barnum Awards Hello, looking for feedback on this page on a Tufts University awards show for excellence in the entertainment industry. Please let me know if you see any errors or have more information. Thank you Carchi01 (talk) 22:35, 7 February 2010 (UTC)carchi01 2/5/10

Denielle Hann

User:Nlmusicguy/Denielle Hann

New to Wiki. Please provide feedback/edits on Denielle Hann. It must also be posted to wiki by someone who has that ability.

Thanks very much Nlmusicguy (talk) 15:23, 9 February 2010 (UTC)Nlmusicguy 09 Feb 2010

Review LTX-Credence article

LTX-Credence Corporation

Two companies have merged, updating the historical data. Easy review. Ref'ed AP article on the subject, sourced by the newly merged company. Rbenech (talk) 22:21, 9 February 2010 (UTC)

Bill Zadick

I've written a biography article for User:Rosalita923/Bill_Zadick, a US amateur wrestler who has won a world championship. It's the first article I've ever created, so I'd be grateful for any and all feedback regarding anything you feel needs to be added, deleted, or cited differently.

Many thanks! --Rosalita923 (talk) 17:27, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

Blik

I would appreciate any feedback for the post I wrote about blik - a cool wall graphics company in Venice. thanks

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Hkoop/blik

Hkoop (talk) 23:11, 10 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, your citations are malformed, see WP:Cite for more info. Also, I'm not sure you have established notibility, the article could use more 2nd and 3rd party references. And this reads pretty much like an advertisement--making the prose more neutral and less enthusiatic would help. Nuujinn (talk) 23:02, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

Obviously your advice to tone it down has fallen on deaf ears. It still reads like an advertisement so I have tagged it for deletion as spam. – ukexpat (talk) 21:48, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

New Article: American Car Designer Eric Stoddard

Request to review information about Automobile Designer Eric Stoddard. Review resources on related car designs, please.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_Stoddard

Speedstudio (talk) 13:14, 11 February 2010 (UTC) SpeedStudioDesign.com

You have a decent amount of resources. I don't really see anything wrong. Maybe remove some of the duplicate content under "Career."

Aimelise (talk) 13:50, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

Tito in ekšn

Tito in ekšn punk rock group from the 90s

Partizanchek (talk) 17:16, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

Hardys Animal Farm (User:Thestuarthardy/Hardys_Animal_Farm)

User:Thestuarthardy/Hardys Animal Farm is a page I'm looking to submit for promotion to the main wikipedia site, describing a large tourist attraction and the features found on it. I have read all the tutorial articles, and this is my first attempt that I've put together for public consumption. However, I was looking to get some feedback from those of you who are more experienced at this and some pointers to ensure the content of the page is appropriate.

Please have a look through and give me your feedback (however critical!) and I'll do my best to apply your suggestions to the article.

Thanks in advance, Stuart Hardy

Thestuarthardy (talk) 18:01, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

French Bull, LLC

French Bull, LLC http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User_talk:161e61 fb161 2/11/10161e61 (talk) 19:09, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

At the moment the draft is way too promotional in tone (please read WP:Spam) to be moved to the mainspace. It also will need references to significant coverage in reliable sources to support notability per WP:CORP. – ukexpat (talk) 20:02, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

Uyama Hiroto

A beginner here, writing an article about an established Japanese musician and producer who ironically does not have much information posted about him on the web. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Elliotmc (talk • contribs) 22:32, 11 February 2010 (UTC)

[1]

Hi I'm preparing a new article about the Scottish writer, Mark Fleming. I believe he is notable because his work is concerned with promoting a positive image of mental health issues.

Would appreciate feedback about the layout / content of this article.

(When previewed, why do hyperlinks appear as numbers rather than text - is this something to do with hyperlinks needing to be verified?) —Preceding unsigned comment added by ColinKNewman (talk • contribs) 13:16, 12 February 2010 (UTC)

Rather than [http://www.laurahird.com/], try <ref>[http://www.laurahird.com/ this is the laura bird website]</ref>. See WP:CITEHOW. You could temporarily add a {{reflist}} during the preview, if you wanted to see how it would look. Usually only one {{reflist}} is in an article, at the bottom. jmcw (talk) 13:33, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Health Advocate Inc.

I would like to have my article Health Advocate Inc. reviewed.

Thanks for your help, Arianne13 (talk) 09:38, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

Looks like a good start! I've done a llttle cleaning up and editing to make it more wiki-like. I also moved it to Health Advocate, as we don't use the Inc. part of the company's name in the article title. The article could still really use some incoming links. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 10:36, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

Teaching Writing in the United States

Teaching Writing in the United States

I posted this article on Feb 6 and have not yet received feedback. How should I go about getting feedback on this article?

Diana Leddy (talk) 15:02, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

Nice article. I made some minor stylistic changes.

My main observations:

• Two of the sections start in a style that seems more suited to essay writing than encyclopedia writing. One starts "Sensing a serious gap...". The other starts "Emerging from both the Writing Process...". I don't know whether the format is officially discouraged, but I didn't like it.
• The lede is too cryptic. Check out WP:LEAD, in particular "The lead should be able to stand alone as a concise overview of the article."--SPhilbrickT 16:56, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

Rockbridge Rapids Baseball

Rockbridge Rapids Baseball

User:Stogieman/Rockbridge Rapids Baseball

How do I move the draft to the main page? Stogieman (talk) 22:34, 13 February 2010 (UTC)

It's not yet ready for the main page. You need to establish Notability through the use of reliable sources as references. While it looks like you have one reference, it isn't properly formed. Check out footnotes for help, and one will not be enough.--SPhilbrickT 03:18, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

Reconnective Therapy

Reconnective Therapy Reconnective Therapy ```` —Preceding unsigned comment added by Psullivan7 (talk • contribs) 13:03, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

Scientific Anomalies

There is a growing public mistrust of scientific announcements with Global Warming the latest to be under attack. The essay suggests a number of anomalies that should be more widely publicised. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Michael Nettleton (talk • contribs) 16:10, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

Assuming you are talking about this, sorry, but it reads like an essay. See WP:NOT. While you do have some references, these are brought together as a WP:SYNTHESIS, which is not appropriate for Wikipedia. SPhilbrickT 15:57, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

The Bar Method

This article was previously deleted. I never saw the original, but wanted to publish my version of The Bar Method. Thank you. 34pin6 (talk) 17:36, 14 February 2010 (UTC)

I did a quick search in Google [2]. This article seems like advertising: see WP:ADVERT. Try to find some strong third-party source: YouTube is not WP:RELIABLE. jmcw (talk) 14:51, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

• A YouTube video can fall under a reliable source, under two conditions:

1. If it is a convenience link

2. If the video contains information that is deemed a secondary source (see YouTube in the section on reliable sources here)

It appears in this case, the author is utilizing the YouTube videos - which house the original news stories - in good faith. As for advertising, it does not appear, at least to me, that this stub is anymore advertising-sounding than the entry on, say, Pilates. I think it's a good start. However, I would double check the facts here of the article before publish; the first sentence, for example, doesn't have adequate support. Artemis84 (talk) 21:07, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

I found some better sources: KUSA-TV, KUSI-TV, Huffington Post, San Diego Magazine and a couple others, all covering the Bar Method in depth. Please have a look: Bar Method Draft. 34pin6 (talk) 01:35, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Just had a look at Bar Method. It has a better encyclopedic tone and many media references to establish notability. The article would be still better if you could find any reference to support the technical description or a reference from a third-party review of the system. Congratulations! jmcw (talk) 13:29, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Crazy Waiting

user:chasingflowers/crazywaiting A recent South Korean movie that I love. Several of the actors have their own Wikipedia pages already, so I thought it would be notable. Chasingflowers (talk) 01:28, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

Physique 57

Physique 57 Physique57

Please assist me with ensuring this article meets all guidelines for Wikipedia. Thank you.

FitHealthy1 (talk) 05:40, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

I'm concerned about whether it meets the Notability threshold. You do have references, some of which probably qualify as reliable sources, and some of which may not, but the reliable sources mentioning Physique 57 barely mention it. I'm not familiar enough with the sources you cite to know which qualify and which do not - you might be fine, but this is just a heads up that there could be a problem.

You have included references, which is good, as many new editors fail on that score, but please look at footnotes and WP:CITE to see how they should be formatted.

In "Future locations", you say "The first California location will open in May, 2010 at 320 N. Canon Drive in Beverly Hills." Wikipedia has a policy called WP:CRYSTAL, to avoid the problem, you could say "planned to open" or similar wording, and it should have a reference.--SPhilbrickT 17:15, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Feedback requested, please.

Hello,

May I please get some feedback on the following page?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Weatherlands/European_Climate_Assessment_and_Dataset_%28ECA%26D%29

I would like to make it live as soon as possible since our website, eca.knmi.nl, has been updated as well.

Note: All images are intended to be copyrighted as open to the public. They are generated by "using" the website which anyone can do.

Thanks for your time, please respond in "my talk."

Good day, ~WL

Weatherlands (talk) 10:24, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

This post says "our website"; what is your connection with this organization? --Orange Mike | Talk 17:45, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi Orangemike, sorry it has taken me so long to respond. I say "our website" because I sometimes work on the project and they gave me the task of sharing information about the database. It is a database of freely available data that is downloadable on the website so no costs are involved at all. The project was initiated by the European Climate Support Network (ECSN) but is coordinated by KNMI. Do you still consider this a conflict of interest?

Also, can you please explain to me why all of my external links have been broken?

Thanks,

Weatherlands (talk) 10:18, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

New Europe (newspaper)

This is my first article. Any feedback would be appreciated!

New Europe User:Sintechhs/NewEurope

Sintechhs (talk) 12:50, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

A google search[3] show many references to this newspaper. I suggest that you add more information from the other sources so that the article sounds less like a press release.

I would also suggest removing the section 'Media Partnerships' because it contains mainly information that will go out-of-date.

And lastly, consider adding

{{Europe topic|List of newspapers in|title=Lists of newspapers in Europe}}

{{Lists by country}}

[[Category:Lists of newspapers| ]] to the end of the article. jmcw (talk) 15:14, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Please Review- East Meets West Productions

I would really appreciate someone reviewing my article on East Meets West Productions. It was named the Small Business Administration's Minority Small Business of the year. I think the article has good citations and is properly formatted.

Thank you,

NMR2010 (talk) 17:27, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

No, it was named the SBA's Corpus Christi district office MSB of the year; not the same thing! --Orange Mike | Talk 18:06, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

Philosophic Burden of Proof

Originally there was one Burden of Proof article that attempted to deal with both Legal Burden of Proof and Philosophic Burden of Proof. This proved too unwieldy, and we therefore decided to split the article into two. Philocentric (talk) 18:34, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

It seems like you took some very positive and constructive steps, great work! One thing I recommend you try before another big change is to notify the Wikiprojects listed on the top of the article's talkpage. In this case, Wikipedia:WikiProject Law. In fact as this is a specialized area and there are some great editors over there please post this thread to that project's talkpage and ask if some folks could take a look. -- Banjeboi 19:29, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Douglas M. Johnston

Douglas M. Johnston

LauraICRD (talk) 20:17, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

I have reviewed the article and removed the new article tag. I added some wikilinks and made some other formatting changes. The article does read like a resumé or curriculum vitae so I have added an appropriate tag and it would appear from your user name that you have a conflict of interest. – ukexpat (talk) 20:40, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

French Bull, LLC Revision

French Bull, LLC[[4]]

I've revised this article any feedback would be outstanding

thank you 2.16.10 161e61 (talk) 21:00, 16 February 2010 (UTC)

HS Beavers

HS Beavers

How can I get the infobox to the top of the page?

I used Template:Infobox UK Ultimate —Preceding unsigned comment added by Fuzzybear47 (talk • contribs) 00:26, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

It looks like there is a problem with the template, but it also looks like you created the template. My template skills are limited, but I'll try to see if I can figure it out.--SPhilbrickT 01:22, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

I looked at the template, but I do not see the problem. You might check at the help desk, where there are more volunteers,a nd often some with technical expertise. You might also post here, where editors with interest and expertise with infoboxes can help. BTW, I'm a it surprised they call themselves and Ultimate Frisbee team, most teams I know have dropped the "Frisbee" as the game is often played with other brands of discs.--SPhilbrickT 01:44, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

You have two issues, IMHO. One is the article itself which I'm not sure if you're creating for fun or practice but I posted a welcome template to your talkpage which has some helpful links. The second is the template which as Sphilbrick notes is a bit complicated. I suggest you ask for template help at Help talk:Template, they are very skilled at templates and likely can sort things out. -- Banjeboi 19:41, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

The Atomic Coffee Machine

This article concerns the 1946 'Atomic' coffee machine. It is factual and referenced. In the future I hope to add more information but I have already provided good references for the article. The images are my own work. I would be happy to have it reviewed.

Generally, this is reasonably written. However, references do not establish notability. For instance, blogs (e.g., CoffeeSnobs.org) are not reliable references, and a Google Patent search that shows only the patent abstract and date is dangerously close to original research. Also often surprising to new editors, other Wikipedia articles are not considered reliable sources. Notability requires coverage in reliable sources other than the ones just mentioned, and beyond a commercial web site dedicated to the subject of the article. See Wikipedia:RS and Wikipedia:N for more on reliable sources and notability, respectively. In this case, you might try searching for coverage in art history or art deco publications, like Art Nouveau and the like. One other minor point: Wikipedia's Manual of Style discourages the use of "The" as the first word in an article title. Better to change yours to "Atomic Coffee Machine".Writeswift 17:07, 17 February 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Writeswift (talk • contribs)

SEARCH, The National Consortium for Justice Information and Statistics

Resolved

 – Article deleted and user blocked for promotional editing. They can request unblock, have the article userfied or simply start a non-work related account. -- Banjeboi 19:12, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

SEARCH, The National Consortium for Justice Information and Statistics

I am new to Wikipedia and would like feedback on which parts sound too much like an advertisement. Thanks!

Chrisatsearch (talk) 15:17, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Ravens & Chimes

Hi Wikipedia community. I would like some help/feedback about my new article Ravens & Chimes that I've posted in my userspace. Any constructive input would be greatly appreciated! Thanks, Baileykwilliams (talk) 18:37, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Fixed the link to your article, and responded on the talk page. —Akrabbim^talk 19:05, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Joseph Matheny

New unreviewed article/Joseph Matheny

(````) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Setianson (talk • contribs) 18:43, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Edwin Hodge

New unreviewed article/Edwin Hodge

tjbw (talk) 21:03, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Derrynoel/Roland Carl Backhouse

User:Derrynoel/Roland Carl Backhouse

This is my first article and I am attempting to marshal the information into a standard format. I am almost finished but need to get my text into the proper layout. Many thanks. Derrynoel Derrynoel (talk) 21:47, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

Progressive Death Metal

I've been working on a Progressive Death Metal article in my users page, I'd just like someone to have a look before I publish it.

The problem in the past has been that there aren't enough prog death sources but I think I've found enough. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Chairmaneoin (talk • contribs) 22:00, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

I moved the article off your main user page to a subpage and started a new talkpage ("Discussion" page) just for the article with handy search tools. I also posted a welcome template on your talkpage which has some helpful links. Your goal will be to find a at least a few more sources that don't just mention the subject but actually talk about it. You don't have to source every statement but adding more sources to the first several paragraphs will help. Keep up the good work! -- Banjeboi 23:38, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

History of Hartford City, Indiana

I have added some sections to History of Hartford City, Indiana since it received its initial rating. What does it need to get beyond a "B"? Does it have too much, too little? What is the preferred style of footnotes and references? TwoScars (talk) 01:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Nathan_Winters/Draft_of_MSRRA

I started working on creating an article User:Nathan_Winters/Draft_of_MSRRA and was looking for some feedback. TIA for your time and assistance. Nathan Winters (talk) 02:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

For one thing, it doesn't explain what the bill actually put into law. —Akrabbim^talk 03:16, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Drafts of bills that never passed are not going to pass our tests of notability. This reeks of publicity for the author of the failed bill. --Orange Mike | Talk 03:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

As the article currently stands it is lacking in information and needs to be expanded. You should include what exactly the law does and how it effects spouses. More on the background of the bill would be helpful also, such as, why was the original bill introduced. Additional reliable secondary sources should be included to show notability. The Facebook source should be completely removed. Also just a small point, the Act did pass and President Obama signed it into law on 11 Nov 2009. ~~ GB fan ~~ ^talk 19:57, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Userpages

I notice that a lot of people on here have fancy "user pages" with colorful alignments and great pictures. Wikipedia could save a lot of server space if we just simplify. Western Pines (talk) 07:19, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

The place to propose changes is Wikipedia:Village pump/Proposals rather than here, which is where people can request feedback on articles they have created. Excessively complex user pages are not encouraged, particularly when the content is unrelated to Wikipedia activities, but opinions on appropriate user page content vary considerably. There is guidance on what you can and cannot have on your userpage here. See also WP:PERFORMANCE. Karenjc 12:02, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Tania de Jong

Hi could i please get some feedback on this article?? it's been up for more than 24 hrs but i havent gotten any feedback. anything would be appreciated! thanks in advance :)

Tania de Jong Enyfink135 (talk) 11:52, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

This seems to be your first article – congratulations on a pretty good start, with most boxes ticked. I’ll remove the unreviewed tag. Suggestions: I’d split the current lead section after “in 40 countries” and place the rest of it in a new “biography” section, and expand her personal details a little if relevant info is available (the Morris Kaplan and Lorna Edwards interviews currently cited in “Further links”would seem to be a good source.). The Reviews section lacks checkable citations and is promotional rather than encyclopaedic; it would be better removed altogether. YouTube links are not blanket-banned in Wikipedia but they often involve illegal use of copyrighted material, and videos of shows and newscasts are specifically mentioned as of concern (see guidance here). Unless you can show that your YouTube links don’t breach policy, they are better removed too. The format of some of your Further links needs tweaking, and you need to add categories - I will help out directly with this shortly. Karenjc 12:36, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Jacob Eisenberg (American musician and author)

I would like to get some feedback on this article. I think it's okay, but would just like to run it by the crew here.

This is about a man who was a noted piano author and teacher during the 1920's - 1940's. He was active till his death in 1964. He wrote about 100 articles and a number of books related to teaching piano. He also interviewed a number of world-famous musicians in his day. Because of the era in which he was active, much of his work is hard to come by now, though there are some articles or excerpts on the web and some of his books are available for sale at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and antiquarian sellers online. Of course, I can't use links for Amazon & crew, so I amassed what I could and added the list of his works that I found in his last book, which I own. He also made a very important contribution to another notable person, namely his wife, in that he taught her piano, an act that led to her becoming internationally famous toward the end of her life.

I look forward to any feedback on this article, either here or on my talk page. Thanks in advance! Marrante (talk) 15:26, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

I think it looks pretty good. Nuujinn (talk) 01:45, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Thank you! Marrante (talk) 03:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Making an article 'Live'

I've created an article, but how do I make it 'Live' now? I know it sounds simple, but I can't seem to figure it out... —Preceding unsigned comment added by Newsdoggie (talk • contribs) 17:00, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

If you mean Ross Palombo, it is live.

However, it needs work. It needs proper references - see WP:CITE and footnotes for more info.

Adding references properly looks hard, but it isn't. Come back if you need more help.--SPhilbrickT 17:43, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Michelle Dipp

Can the team review the new article Michelle Dipp?

Holly2305 (talk) 17:18, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

I'm new here, but this looks like a résumé to me. Have a look at WP:SPIP and Wikipedia:RESUME to find out more about Wikipedia's policy on this sort of article. Marrante (talk) 17:43, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

I agree. CEO's of companies are not always notable, and VPs almost never are (on the basis of position). Meeting Notability standards with reliable sources is important. I confess I looked quickly, but I didn't see any evidence of a source sufficient to establish notability.--SPhilbrickT 17:50, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Ok fine but pls dont go tag the article just yet..lets bring this concerns up on the talk page first ...see if your concerns can be satisfied...We cant keep deleting every new article form new editors..we will keep losing them ...! no speed delete needed i think ..if you like a vote perhaps ..Buzzzsherman (talk) 17:56, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

It would help if new editors would create new articles in user space, then we wouldn't have to worry about the possibility of over-zealous deletion. In fact, if Holly would consent, this could be moved to user space, and cleaned up at a leisurely pace. Otherwise, it should meet out requirement and it decidedly doesn't. I did a quick search myself to see if I could find something notable about her, but failed. Doesn't mean it isn't there, but it is more work than just a simple search and add references.--SPhilbrickT 18:48, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Well i like you Sphilbrick...great idea lets PM her and make this suggestion...if only everyone was like you and thinking of the new editors feelings ..no way a new editor will ever know all the 5000 guidelines... !hug Sphilbrick...Buzzzsherman (talk) 19:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

vegetable monsters

vegetable monsters Please give me all the feedback possible - and any comments you may have on content and/or style. Rdeastis (talk) 19:20, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

This page needs a lot of work, and may not meet the criteria for inclusion at all. The article applies the term to all plants of the genus Monstera, whereas there is no reference to indicate that this term is in general use for this genus of plants. The term is attributed to Erasmus Darwin who does, indeed, use the term in his Botanic Garden..., but no to refer to Monstera species specifically, but to any plant which meets his definition (i.e. plants with double flowers). The etymology of the term "monster" is also wrong: monstrum is no "that which teaches" but rather "that which warns" (monere = to warn). (See the etymology of monster at M-W.com.) If the article is allowed to remain, the references must be rewritten to be inline references, so the facts and the references which verify them can be linked. WikiDan61^ChatMe!_ReadMe!! 19:41, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Systemic bias

Question unrelated to the purpose of this page
bg
I am a regular and prolific wikipedia editor. I have on-going problems with POV, incivility and "cabalism" by members of a particular wikiproject. The problem is this: there is a certain class of topics which are interdisciplinary (I will call the fields field A and field B), but the members of the project for field A demonstrate no respect for the contributions of editors in field B. The members of field A greatly outnumber the members of field B, and their attitude seems to be that these topics are solely within thier own province, and that field B is really just, sort of a pretender (as if they think B is like a hobby to them or something, when it actually is a more rigorous and comprehensive study than A is.) Great volumes of legitimate, academically supported, and unique contributions have been deleted. Some of it wholesale, and some of it is the long term, peacemeal activity. Some of it is by a few dedicated editors, and some of it is by one-timers, and newbies. The problem seems to be a pervasive attitude within the field A. I have several questions, but my primary one is this: beyond the mediation services provided in WP, is there some judicial check? If I disagree with a mediated resolution, is there some duly appointed judicial body which is authoritative? My problem is that the "wikipedia consensus" obviously fails in situations like these. Is a mediation committee able to see beyond the rancor of a large group that wrongly sees contributions from field B as "POV pushing" when the reality is that academics from field B actually produce legitimate subject matter. It seems that the problem is respecting legitimate interdisciplinary contributions.Anon12e456 (talk) 19:52, 18 February 2010 (UTC) WP:Systemic bias is a known and recognized problem at Wikipedia. As an organization that generally governs itself by consensus, members of larger groups are going to skew the view of the encyclopedia toward their side. Ideally, the dispute resolution process should address this bias by involving editors who are not involved in either side of the dispute. Unfortunately, it often happens that editors who are not familiar with either side are not well enough informed to make useful decisions, and so they stay away from such discussions. I'm afraid there really isn't a "final arbiter"; the community itself is its own final arbiter. I can only suggest that you exercise patience and try to build bridges between "field A" and "field B" to produce better articles in the common areas. I also suggest that you review the sockpuppetry rules. You claim to be a "regular and prolific" editor, and yet this user name was created solely for the purpose of creating this entry. Creating a new account to avoid the scrutiny of those with whom you have a dispute does not appear to fall under the legitimate uses of an alternative account. WikiDan61ChatMe!ReadMe!! 21:16, 18 February 2010 (UTC) (ec)Sorry, but you are in the wrong place. This is a place to elicit feedback about specific articles. You have a concern, but a very different concern. I urge you to check out Wikipedia:Dispute resolution, and try some of the steps there, and look into mediation or arbitration, as well as discussion at project pages if they exist.--SPhilbrickT 21:21, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

List of Academy Award Winning Families

User:Klantry01/List of Academy Award Winning Families

List of Academy Award winners related to other winners, subdivided into Extended Families, Siblings, and Couples. Started it after moviemom posted trivia that there was only one 3-generation winning family (The Huston's), when in fact there are two others (The Coppola's and the Farrow/Previn/Allen's), and I couldn't find a reference.

Main concern: I can't say for sure I've done the full geneology on every oscar winner. There may be an ex-spouse, in-law, or cousin I've missed. How should I reflect that?

Klantry01 (talk) 21:40, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

p.s. Open to input on an alternate title. Current one, strictly interpreted, could be "the families of anyone who has won an award." List of Multiple Academy Award Winning Families is similarly ambiguous. List of Academy Award Winners Related to Other Winners is clunky. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Klantry01 (talk • contribs) 13:33, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Environmental Law in India: Judicial Activism, Public Interest Litigation and Green Benches

Can someone please help me with formatting and with general comments on this article about environmental law in india Thank you --Ahhjean33 (talk) 23:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Here is a link to the article User:Ahhjean33/new article name here ~~ GB fan ~~ ^talk 23:30, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

Quite good. Some formatting issues:

• Wikipedia generally puts reference citations after punctuation, in particular just after the period that closes a sentence.
• Wikipedia generally uses "logical quotation" meaning that punctuation is palced inside quote markss only if it was part of the original quotation.
• Wikipeida normally uses "straight quotes", not "curly" or "angled" quotes in which the opening quote is different from the closing quote.
• The use of named references (see Help:Footnotes and citing sources allows multiple references to the same paper or source to go to a single footnote, which improves consistence. I have made this change in one case, as an example.
• When a source is cited as a specific reference to a specific statment, it is redundant to include it also as a "general reference" -- that is, to list it in the references section without being attached to a specific citation. Some such sources might be listed in a "Further reading" section.
• You might want to consider the list defined reference format, which separates the detailed reference metadata from the body text. It does have the disadvantage of requiring two edits to add a reference if section editing is being used.
• There needed to be more wiki-links to other wikipedia articles, I have added several.
• I personally recommend the use of citation templates, but this is not required. I have converted the first two references as an example. The reference toolbar gadget (found in the gadgets tab of the preferences dialog) makes adding such references easier, but sometiems manual editing is still needed, as not all options are supported by this gadget.

I hope this is helpful. DES ^(talk) 07:12, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Dora Levy Mossanen

User:Pieraklein/Dora Levy Mossanen

I would like help adding content to this page. There is already a reference to one of the author's books on wikipedia under Harem and then the Fiction Section. I would like to link these pages.

Also this author is a regular contributor to the Huffington Post, has been featured in various media: radio (NPR - National Public Radio: The Politics of Culture), tv, blogs, papers, etc. and has her book translated into more than 10 different languages.

I am still learning how to add content... Any additions are welcome, and notes, or comments.

Best, Pieraklein (talk) 00:12, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Nice work. I can't see any immediate issues, but it would suggest some minor adjustments such as adding categories and expanding the scope of the topic. -Reconsider! 08:37, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Dietary Supplements

User:Healthycare/L-arginine_ethyl_ester
User:Healthycare/Calcium beta-hydroxy-beta-methylbutyrate
User:Healthycare/Guanidinopropionic Acid

I would like to know your opinion on these 3 articles and if they are ready to be moved to the main space. Thank you. J.D. (talk) 13:10, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Regarding User:Healthycare/L-arginine_ethyl_ester

Looks pretty good.

• I didn't like this sentence, L-arginine ethyl ester represents a white powder quickly soluble in hot water in particular, represents. I'm not coming up with a good alternative, but there must be a better way to say this.
• The chemical diagram doesn't show up very well. It would look better as an SVG (see Lysine as an example).
• If you don't know how to create an SVG, you can put in a request at this place, and someone may convert it for you.
• Please add some categories. See WP:CAT if you don't know what this means. See Leucine for examples.--SPhilbrickT 18:51, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Regarding User:Healthycare/Calcium beta-hydroxy-beta-methylbutyrate:

• As above, I don't like the word represents. I also don't like criticising without an alternative, but I haven't come up with a good alternative.
• In Physical & Chemical Properties, this sentence Also small amount of heavy metals is allowed (lead NMT 1 ppm and arsenic NMT 1 ppm) is not very encyclopedic. I'm not quite sure how to rephrase it - possibly and may contains trace amounts of heavy metals such as lead and arsenic or just remove it.
• I don't like the opening sentence in Side effects, which currently reads No side effects were observed during the intake of calcium ?-HMB, though you should always make sure to keep to the prescriptions.. Either remove, or figure out how to fold it into the subsequent sentences, if it arises from the same referenced study.
• As above, the chemical diagram would look better if it were an SVG, although this one is not as hard to read.
• Please add some categories. See WP:CAT if you don't know what this means. See Leucine for examples.--SPhilbrickT 22:23, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

William R. Hawkins

I request feedback on William R. Hawkins The item is biographical note on a conservative writer. Eamonn FingletonEfingleton (talk) 14:29, 19 February 2010 (UTC) (I removed some redundant sections and entries)--SPhilbrickT 18:32, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

I suspect he meets the Notability requirement, but you haven't established that. While you do have some references, I didn't see any that meet the reliable source standard. While the existing references are fine to support the points they are used to support, I didn't see any that help establish his notability. According to his bio, he "has published over 140 articles". Surely some can be linked, but the key is to find some coverage of him in newspapers and other reliable sources.

Assuming you can find those, check out Article Layout to see how an article should be organized, specifically the creation of a WP:LEAD.

Please check out WP:CITE and footnotes, to see how references should be created.

Sorry, sounds like a fair amount of work, but Biographies of living persons are help to a high standard.--SPhilbrickT 23:28, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

metroMAGAZINE

user:spiritofomaha/metroMAGAZINE is about a company in Omaha that does monthly magazine publications. Im asking for feedback on this article. SpiritofOmaha.com (talk) 15:42, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

This sounds like an advertisement and lacks a neutral point of view, and I wonder what your relationship with this magazine is given your user name. I also don't know if this magazine is notable. I googled briefly and can't find any reliable 2nd or 3rd party sources that discuss this magazine. Nuujinn (talk) 00:44, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Rapper Fat Tone

(FAT TONE User:Originalrecordz/Fat-Tone)

17:48, 27 January 2010 (UTC)BiggKhrisco (talk)

(I removed some redundant sections and entries)--SPhilbrickT 18:30, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

International media reaction to Barack Obama's election

I would like to invite feedback on this draft article on the international media reaction to Barack Obama's 2008 election. Please note that images are available to improve the article's look and will be added once the page is published. Please leave comments on the draft's discussion page. Thank you! --Amandaroyal (talk) 19:06, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

User:BufordWrite/Battersea_(Petersburg,_VA)

Hello -

I've created a new page for a historically significant property in Petersburg, VA. I did use the Article Wizard and have tried to include as much info, sources and other details as I can. Any comments or feedback is appreciated as this is my first wiki article. Thanks!!

BufordWrite (talk) 19:37, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, number one, you need to link those references to the actual points in the text of your article. You've got quite a few references there and my brief glance says this is probably okay as a subject matter and the writing looks (from the little I read) to be appropriate. But you need to fix those reference links and check out your categories too. They're all the wrong color. I think it's probably a capitalization problem. Happens to me too -- I'm new, as well. But you look to be off to a good start! In future, it's helpful to put a link to the article in the request itself, too. The title of the request (which becomes a section header) is not linked, so you have to repeat it in the request again, this time, wikilinked. Hope this helps! Marrante (talk) 17:56, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Specifically, check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.--SPhilbrickT 02:08, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

User:UAB Wiki/Underwater Archaeology Branch, Naval History & Heritage Command

I have undertaken my first wikipedia page to draw attention to a very interesting branch of the NHHC which does not get recognized, although there are numerous mentions of UAB in H.L. Hunley and CSS Alabama. I feel confident my page is well written, but I am having a hard time knowing whether I have the necessary references to be considered encyclopedic. Any feed back would be most welcome. User:UAB Wiki/Underwater Archaeology Branch, Naval History & Heritage Command

UAB Wiki (talk) 21:24, 19 February 2010 (UTC)Leachers, 19 February 2010

Decent start, fair amount of interesting information, however, you need some work on references. I assume some of the material came from here, but you need to identify the source of each fact. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.

I also suspect that there are dedicated editors at this task force page who may be interested in providing specific help. Just contact one or more at their talk page.--SPhilbrickT 02:05, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Bungaroosh

I've just written a draft of my first article, User:Shermarama/Bungaroosh, and I'd appreciate some feedback. It's heavily based on one source, which reflects my experience of this peculiar building material very well. Other sources are proving difficult to find, because it's a really specifically regional building material only found in the Brighton area - its obscurity, the fact that most people don't know what sort of mess they've bought, is part of its notability. But does it sound sufficiently notable for wikipedia? Worth carrying on trying to find other references? --Shermarama (talk) 22:03, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

I'm not _sure_ if it's notable, given it's limited usage--but then Clutch is just about as notable. It sounds like an interesting topic tho, and there are a lot of different building materials up here. I did find a couple of references:

http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1P2-5278654.html

http://www.buildingopinions.com/Archive/S/stamford.html

Also see http://www.urbanwords.info/supplement.php?initial=B, there's reference to Rob Fraser in regard to Bungaroosh, you might see if you can track that down.

Nuujinn (talk) 01:35, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for the feedback. The Rob Fraser article (the one referred to on urbanwords is the same single reference I've got) seems to be the only source article anywhere - would adding other references that mention bungaroosh, rather than being about it, help establish its notability? --Shermarama (talk) 19:29, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

It depends on the nature of the source. What you really want are books or newspaper articles, but if you find a reference to a particular aspect of the topic, other sources might work. If you're local to the area, you might contact newspapers or libraries to see if they have any references.

Take a look at this:

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/impact-funding-to-aid-heritage-1428094.html

I think that's a good source, since it's from a reliable newspaper and references a public program designed to cope with the problems related to the building material. Nuujinn (talk) 20:06, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Unknown Sailor of Hindhead, Surrey, England

Feedback on....

Unknown Sailor please

BTP51 (talk) 22:13, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

I have reviewed and made some formatting edits, in particular removing the white spaces cause by the unnecessary hard line breaks (<br />). Apart from that, looks good! – ukexpat (talk) 18:00, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Many thanks. Headings are much tighter now.

BTP51 (talk) 18:41, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

General Paul Johnson

I wrote an article on General Paul Johnson, and I'm looking for some feedback. I found a few sources, and he meets the guidelines for notability, but I haven't found much on his actual career. I'm hoping someone could help with that. Rin tin tin 1996 (talk) 15:32, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

It definitely needs a fair amount of work. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes to see how to add references. (While you listed two external sites that should qualify as references, you didn't include the footnotes to identify the source of information.)

This page is for general help, I suggest that you talk to someone with experience regarding military biographies, as there is a style and format desired for those biographies, and those involved in the project are likely to be interested in helping and know how to find additional sources to help you.

Check out Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/United States military history task force, in general. Note the list of members, along with their areas of interest/expertise. For example, User:Colgator lists US Air Force. Consider leaving a note at the talk page of one or more of the project, and I'll bet they'll be willing to help. If you don't know how to leave a message at a Talk page, click on the word "talk" after their name, then click on "new Section" at the top of the page, and ask them to contact you. They'll respond at your talk page.--SPhilbrickT 01:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Pasquill Cavaliero

Hi folks,

Please provide some feedback on the new page. I'm especially interested in informed or expert opinion from those with a knowledge of early modern literature and theology, if we have such experts on board. Thanks!--BenJonson (talk) 16:56, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

I posted a request here

You are encouraged to contact Ret.Prof yourself, he promises not to bite.--SPhilbrickT 22:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Inclusion in New Jersey page

Is there a way to include magazines in the New Jersey page? I'd like to include New Jersey Business magazine, the oldest business magazine in New Jersey. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Vinlynne (talk • contribs) 17:17, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

There is a section on media, but it isn't perfectly clear where it belongs. I suggest you think about where it belongs (perhaps changing Newspapers to Newspapers and Magazines, but post your proposal at the Talk Page, in case someone has a better idea. If there are no objections or better ideas, go for it.--SPhilbrickT 22:00, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Anthony Lombardi

Anthony Lombardi

Arlombardi (talk) 19:03, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, your userid id suggests you may not be able to maintain a neutral point of view, and the article reads like an advertisement. Until the TV episode is shown, I'm not sure this Antony Lombardi is notable, and I think the article also needs additional reliable sources to establish notability. Nuujinn (talk) 20:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

Please read WP:COI. While it may seem odd that you would be discouraged from contributing to an article when you probably know more than any other editor, it actually makes sense in the context of the Wikipedia goals. All is not lost, though, if someone else creates an article, you are permitted, even encouraged, to post information to the related Talk Page, suggesting corrections, addition, or relevant sources, but other, uninvolved editors should make the changes.--SPhilbrickT 22:07, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

TARGIT, a novel technique for delivering radiotherapy in the operating theatre.

I've drafted a page on this in my userspace: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Norman21/TARGIT Please have a look and let me have your comments before I move it into mainspace. Thanks. Norman21 (talk) 19:41, 20 February 2010 (UTC)

I would recommend reviewing our guideline on citing sources, and specifically i would suggest the use of {{Cite journal}}. Specifically, it is not helpful to use abbreviated names of journals on Wikipedia, no matter how common that may be in other publications. Providing a link to an online version of a cited source is very helpful when possible. If the journal has an article on Wikipedia, wiki-linking the name of the journal in the citation can be helpful, but is not required.

Normally I would be inclined to doubt that an experimental technique not yet in general use was notable, but there does seem to be several reliable sources here. Are there any sources that are independent of the group that developed this technique? If not the articel might seem a bit promotional.

There needs to be a clearer explanation for non-technical readers what this technique is, what it does, how it is an improvement on other techniques, and how it fits into a larger context.

Overall this is an excellent start, IMO. DES ^(talk) 06:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for your helpful comments, which have been incorporated. The result is called TARGIT. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Norman21 (talk • contribs) 17:16, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

There is already an existing article on Intraoperative radiation therapy, and the new article just appears to be an expansion of that stub, so why not merge the content of TARGIT into Intraoperative radiation therapy? There is no reason to have two articles (albeit one a stub) about the same thing. – ukexpat (talk) 17:37, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Battle of the Argesul

I was just wondering if this is ready for launch, so if any comments are available, either voice them here or update the article itself at User:Buggie111/Battle of the Argesul. Pretty fun working on it. Buggie111 (talk) 00:50, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

It would be helpful to explain what is notable about this battle. I don't know enough about the rules for military notability; if all battles are deemed notable, then this will qualify, but even if true, it would be helpful to explain what is special about this battle - was it important to either side in any particular way?

You have a couple references, but the citation style could be improved. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.

You might check in on this task force page. There are editors hanging out there who may be able to give you more specific feedback.--SPhilbrickT 02:53, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Tom Laughlin

Last year, I did substantial work on this article over a period of several weeks. I then submitted it for a Good Article nomination, which it failed. I now know that this was indeed not a "good article". I have been a little busy lately, but yesterday and today I have managed to fix many of the problems the GA reviewer said were wrong with the article and am basically if I get a good response here, I will submit it for a peer-review and eventually good article status. If you look at the article's history you will see that this article was a mess before I began editing it last year.BillyJack193 (talk) 06:00, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Been waiting since last night. I actually expected this to take longer, but please look at articles that have been posted first. Most of what has been posted under me has received comment. And check this out for the version of the article directly before I made my first edit in April of last year. [5].BillyJack193 (talk) 22:13, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

I've looked at the article (it looks good), but I've been mulling over how to respond. I created a few articles, and edited many, but have not gone through the GAN process, so I'm not up to speed on the fine points of what is acceptable and what is not. Frankly, this page is more focused on very new editors (mostly because article wizard creations are directed here. I won't speak for the others who stick their nose in on occasion and respond, but I think most are expecting to help with more basic needs such as adding references. I checked out Wikipedia:Good articles to see if they have a process, but it appears (after a quick read) that you get feedback by submitting it. I gather you are trying to get informal feedback to decide whether you are ready to submit a formal request.

In short, I don't have the requisite experience to help. My suggestion is to visit Wikipedia:Good articles, pick out a couple editors who seem like regulars, and ask them for an informal review. Or you can wait here, and maybe someone will come along and offer thoughts, but requests such as yours are rare (I can't recall any) so it might not happen. Wish I could give you a better answer.--SPhilbrickT 23:48, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Thank you.BillyJack193 (talk) 00:23, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

I'll try to do a copyedit soon. For the moment I've done a massive references overhaul, fixing the dates for everything, adding isbns, changing citation templates to specific (everything was cited using cite journal) etc.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 13:35, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Mark W. Moffett New page to post

I would like to post a new page about the Sociobiologist/National Geographic Top Photograher/Ant expert/etc. Mark Moffett. Below is the draft of the article. I hope that someone will offer feedback before I post it. Thanks. Never did this before. -Roc Ordman

Mark W. Moffett, Ph.D. “Mark has developed a career that combines science and photography, in spite of being a high school dropout. Although his family was not academic, encouraged by his parents he sought out biologists by the age of 12. “ [1] Moffett received his BA in Biology at Beloit College in Wisconsin in 1979. He received his PhD from Harvard University where he studied with E. O. Wilson, who developed the field of sociobiology. Mark was the first PhD candidate that Wilson had accepted in about a decade, but Mark was so fascinated by ant behavior that Wilson agreed to accept him as a student. Moffett taught himself novel photographic techniques for his 1989 Ph.D. on ants. National Geographic magazine published these novel photographs. Moffett went on to be the curator of ants at Harvard, and then to direct Harvard's Museum of Comparative Zoology. His research concerns insect social behavior and the structure and dynamics of forest ecosystems, particularly their canopies. He travels the world studying different insects and ecosystems. He has investigated canopies of the Amazon rain forest, where he operates a research station in Peru. He also has worked on the supertall coniferous forests of the Pacific Northwest, for which he led the first ever ascent and study of the world's tallest tree, known as the National Geographic redwood. In 1993 Harvard University Press published Moffett's book, The High Frontier: Exploring the Tropical Rainforest Canopy. He has a new book coming out in early 2010. Today his research and National Geographic photography are interspersed with writing and public lecturing about rain forests. In 2010, he is Research Associate, NMNH, the Smithsonian Institution, Associate Curator, the University of California, Berkeley, and Contract Photographer, National Geographic Magazine. He also operates a research station in the Amazon Rainforest in Peru along the Amazon River. A photomural he produced there can be seen at Olbrich Botanical Gardens in Madison, WI.

A web search of his name reveals a host of books, photos, articles, prizes, TV appearances, and other achievements of this remarkable explorer who began with a devotion to learning.

Top photographer for National Geographic

First of all, let me welcome you here.

I think what you may want to do to get started is use the new article wizard to walk you through creation of this article. This page is not intended for posting of drafts--rather, you should create an article in your user space or elsewhere and then post a request for feedback here. That being said, this is a nice start--the prose is somewhat rough, but that's not unusual for a draft. What you really need, though, are some verifiable and reliable sources to help you establish Moffett as a notable person, such as newspaper or magazine articles. It's not really sufficient to say that a web search will reveal these, what you need to do is put citations within the article. Nuujinn (talk) 15:34, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Mitchmarx1/Grad_Associates

User:Mitchmarx1/Grad_Associates Mitchmarx1 (talk) 16:06, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Not bad as a start, but additional references are needed to establish notability. One source that is a 4-paragraph story is not really enough. Also, there should be more about what this firm actually did -- mentions of notable buildings or projects on which they worked for example, or innovations that they introduced. None of that should be overly hard to add, i would hope. DES ^(talk) 16:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

TuneVibez

Link: User:Charliebobgordon/TuneVibez Charliebobgordon (talk) 16:16, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

This needs more citations, particularly to independent reliable sources, both to support the facts stated, and to establish notability. Your current citations are to "The Year's Best Small Business on Twitter" which seems to be a user-voted award award thus not a reliable source at all. Your further reading section currently lists writings by two people involved with this project, which are therefore not independent, and a you-tube link which is highly unlikely to be considered a reliable source --youtube almost never is. The external links are no better: sites by involved people, blogs, twitter, youtube, facebook and a forum. Not a reliable source in the lot, by Wikipedia standards. You need independent, published comment. I advise that you consult WP:CITE, WP:RS, and WP:WEB. Mind you, with better sources, this isn't a bad start on an article. The main issue is establishing notability. I hope this is helpful. DES ^(talk) 17:01, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

I'll add that this all seems to be an advertisement. I see that you are a new member of wikipedia, but you might read up on Wikipedia and conflict of interest. From your userid and the TuneVibez web site, can I assume that you are the DJ and webmaster for TuneVibez? If so, I congratulate you on the effort that you and your friends are putting into this endeavor, but wikipedia is not an appropropriate place to promote your business. I agree with DES that the article is pretty good, but you will definitely need better sources. Nuujinn (talk) 17:11, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Vukovi Beograd

Vukovi Beograd article Vukovi_Beograd --Alexbgd83 (talk) 20:07, 21 February 2010 (UTC)Aleksandar Andjelkovic 21.2.2010

Ir looks very good and is well--written, subject seems notable enough. However, there are no inline citations. I'm sure that since you were able to write such a good article on the subject, you got your information from somewhere. Simply credit your sources. Hope this helps.BillyJack193 (talk) 21:55, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

References can be tricky, but check out WP:CITE and footnotes, which should help you. Come back if it isn't clear, and we can provide an example.--SPhilbrickT 22:20, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

Mehgan Heaney-Grier

The name of the article is Mehgan Heaney-Grier. The wikilink is Mehgan Heaney-Grier or [[6]] - (not sure which link will work).

I authored and posted this article for wikipedia. It is about freediver Mehgan Heaney-Grier who, in 1996, established the first-ever freedive record for both men and women in the United States. Additionally, she is an actress, model and has hosted, been featured in and produced many television shows.

This article was done in conjunction with Mehgan for fact verification and with her permission. She has also given permission (in writing) to Wikipedia to use the images that are included in the article and on/in Wikipedia Commons.

Lastly, I saw the clean up tag requesting fewer photos in the article - thus we removed two of them.

Please give us any other feedback that might help us better the article.

Thank you, Petey Jones and Mehgan Heaney-Grier 2/21/2010 Mhg165 (talk) 21:50, 21 February 2010 (UTC)

I don't think this is too bad, but it comes off as promotional, and although she's clearly notable, the article needs additional 2nd and 3rd parties references. I don't think it quite reaches neutral point of view. The lede says she's a naturalist, and I see that she's working towards graduation, but the article would be better if it listed her work in this area beyond hosting tv shows and giving talks, especially if she has any publications. The http://sanctuaries.noaa.gov/news/features/0107_ecocenter.html link doesn't mention her, so I think it may not be relevent. As for the pics, I think the face shot and the shot of her deep diving are the only pics you need for this purpose. She's an attractive women, but my thought is that a picture should add to the content in a substantial way. The mermaid shot isn't explained--I'm guessing she worked with Weeki Wachee, if so, why not mention that? Also, I'd suggest dropping the last two external links--linking to her facebook and youtube pages suggest the purpose of the article is promotional in nature. Nuujinn (talk) 00:26, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

The Prometheus Institute

The Prometheus Institute

Dlasker88 (talk) 00:11, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

not a bad start. It needs more details if possible, and more references, particularly from news sources, if possible. References should not be just bare links, but should include such metadata as the name of the work, the title of the articel or story or web page, the date of publication, the author when known, etc. If the reference is a bare link, all data can be lsot if the link goes bad, and a user looking at the list of references needs to follow each one to see what sort of sources are being used. I recommend the use of the citation templates, although this is not required.

I have adjusted most, but not all, of the references to use citation templates.

Oh the last reference, the one to http://www.statehousecall.org/ doesn't seem top mention the subject at all. Perhaps the story is now in the archives?

my error, the site is run by the organization.

Nice work so far. I hope this is helpful. DES ^(talk) 02:42, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

hello design

Hello Design

Helloscott99 (talk) 00:27, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

A bit on the dubious side for notability as it stands. Many of the references appear to be to passing mentions of the firm, not significant coverage, and several seem to be to blogs or other sources that are not reliable sources. The articel needs to expand on why the firm is different from the run of the mill design agency, or why it is significant and important, adn it needs more substantial independent coverage. Still it could be worse for a start. DES ^(talk) 21:15, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

User:HealthGal/Tracey_Powell

This is an article about Tracey Powell, a healthcare entrepreneur who is highly-recognized in the industry as having produced the first and only FDA-approved at-home kits for anonymous HIV and Hepatitis-C testing. By de-stigmatizing STD testing and providing an online, confidential forum for risk evaluation and expert test recommendations, he has enabled thousands who otherwise would not have sought out such information to receive anonymous STD testing, and subsequent treatment as applicable.

HealthGal (talk) 01:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Sun Yat-sen's prayer at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor

Hi

This is my first article (lot of fun). In fact I have never edited a page either. I was going through the page on Sun Yat-sen trying to find out about this prayer that he made at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor. I had seen a reference to the fact that Sun Yat-sen had visited and prayed at the tomb three days after he took power in a book on the Forbidden city. I got very curious as to why he, who had been trying to overthrow the Qing dynasty, would visit the tomb of the founder of the Ming dynasty. In any case one thing led to another and I managed to find the original prayer mentioned in a book published in 1912.

I would like to add a reference to this prayer in Sun Yat-sen's original article and as such would like to add the prayer itself as an article which can be then be linked.

User:MalikFeb2010/Sun Yat-sen's prayer at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor

MalikFeb2010 (talk) 04:49, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

For starters, welcome to Wikipedia. Please continue to edit here. Looking at the article on Sun Yat-Sen, I see no reason for this to be a separate article. But it is very well written and sourced and probably belongs within the article if it is indeed notable enough. Unfortunately, I do not know enough about his life to tell you if it is notable or not, but regardless, it does not need its own article.BillyJack193 (talk) 04:58, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for the quick feedback. I think this was a very graceful tribute by Sun Yat-sen to the Ming Emperor and as such should be part of the page on him - also points to the centuries long conflicts that have taken place between the Chinese Han race and the Eastern and Western Tartars. I presume (not sure how it gets determined if it is notable enough or not) that it will be okay for me to go ahead and figure out the appropriate place and add it into the original Sun Yat-sen article.MalikFeb2010 (talk) 05:43, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

From what you have said, it is notable enough, so go ahead and add it. If you put it in the wrong place, I am sure some of the other editors of the article will help you out. Good luck.BillyJack193 (talk) 06:04, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

I am going to have to disagree with the above comments. The place for the complete text of the prayer is Wikisource - the text can be posted there and linked to in the main article. Large chunks of source material like this should not be added to a Wikipedia article. – ukexpat (talk) 20:40, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

I have no problem putting it in Wikisource. However can you point out which category you think is appropriate? Please do consider that this is not a "religious prayer" in the strictest sense of the word. I checked Wikisource and am not sure where you would like to see it placed. Any recommendations? MalikFeb2010 (talk) 03:43, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Miaohui

Literally Temple Fair, this is a festivity common in China during the Chinese New Year. A lot of materials are already present on Chinese WP. I wonder if anyone wants to have a look and make some translations if possible. It is amazing that no article exists yet about this tradition.Btmachine333667 (talk) 09:52, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Johnnie Bassett

I created a new article, which was nominated for speedy deletion under section G12. Eventually I had the item returned to my user page, here - User:Derek R Bullamore/Johnnie Bassett. I have had several trial attempts at re-writing it, but always seem to end up back in the same place. Correspondence on my user talk page, here - User talk:Derek R Bullamore, may give you more background. Basically I am stuck, and would much appreciate another pair of eyes to try to knock this into shape. Please do feel free to sub-edit the 'draft' article itself, if this is easier for you. Maybe it is me that needs knocking into shape, not the article ! Many thanks,

Derek R Bullamore (talk) 14:39, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Council of Residential Specialists

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Council_of_Residential_Specialists I have created an article about the largest subsidiary for the national association of realtors. They are a non for profit council that has several different functions in the real estate market. Thank you for your time!

216.21.37.146 (talk) 15:08, 22 February 2010 (UTC)Rob Kairis 02/22/10

There are a number of problems

• All of the references are bare hyperlinks, and need to be converted to include the relevant metadata, either manually or by use of citation templates, I would favor the latter. See WP:CITE and Help:footnotes for more details.
• Most of the citations are to parts of the organization's own web site, or to press relatives or directory entries. Few are to independent reliable sources, and more such are needed. As it stands the citations do not establish notability, see our guideline on notability of organizations.
• The article violated our style guideline on trademarks which advises "Follow standard English text formatting and capitalization rules even if the trademark owner considers nonstandard formatting 'official'" and "Do not use the ™ and ® symbols, or similar, in either article text or citations, unless unavoidably necessary for context". I have fixed this issue, buyt please note it for the future.
• The article is written in a rather promotional tone. Phrases like "seeking the knowledge, tools and relationship-building opportunities needed to maximize their income and professionalism in residential real estate." are marketing-speak.
• The "Mission Statement and Objectives" are apparently direct quotes, but are not formatted or explicitly attributed as such.

I hope these notes are helpful. DES ^(talk) 20:39, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Alpha, Washington

Sorry if I'm asking for feedback too often, but I would like to know what is left before I launch User:Buggie111/Alpha, Washington. I've nearly knocked myself insane finding info about this, and I'd like to move it to it's namespace home as part of my unannounced de-redlink the Lewis County, washington tempalte campaign. Constructive critiscisim would be appreciated.

Buggie111 (talk) 17:09, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

I've done a revamping of the references and formatting. It could certainly use some more detailed information and sources, though my searches turned up nothing.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 18:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, I could not find anything else in searches, and I do not want to pay for a flight to Seattle to reasearch. I'd say that this is as far as I could go. Buggie111 (talk) 19:24, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Visionlearning.com

I just created the article Visionlearning.com User:Neopropism/Visionlearning.com and would love some feedback on the tone, etc. I've tried to be as unbiased as possible, but am not sure if some of my descriptions seem too favorable.

Thanks! Neopropism (talk) 17:22, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Wendy K. Wilkins

Hello,

I am looking for feedback on my first Wikipedia article on Wendy K. Wilkins. I know the Wikilink will not work, so here is the link to the page itself: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CLEARllh/Wendy_Wilkins

Does anybody know how I can change the Wikilink so it links correctly? There is already an article on Wendy Wilkins, but not the one this article is about, so I've changed my article to Wendy K. Wilkins, but only in title. How do I change it so that when you search for Wendy K. Wilkins it comes up with my article?

I have a request out to Ms. Wilkins for her birthdate and as soon as I hear back I will change the dummy text in my article to that date. I am working on uploading a photo of her for the article, but doing everything on here for the first time seems a little overwhelming and confusing at best. I'm working on it, though! Any feedback would be greatly appreciated. CLEARllh (talk) 17:41, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi CLEARllh,

You can link to the article in its current location using User:CLEARllh/Wendy Wilkins. To move an article, you can click on the move tab at the top of the page.

I think your page should be the Wendy Wilkins page, since it refers to a real person, but perhaps that is an issue best left for another day. Your article seems pretty well referenced and ready to move to article space so if I were you I would click on the move tab and where it says "User:CLEARllh/Wendy Wilkins" change it to say "Wendy K. Wilkins". On the Wendy Wilkins page, you will need to add a disambiguation hatnote pointing to your article. If you are not sure how to do that I can help.

In terms of the actual article, it doesn't have to have the date of birth so I would remove the place holder. It is generally well researched. My main concern is that a lot of it is just a big list, which isn't really the style you would expect from a biography article. Perhaps it should be cut down to the more interesting things. Maybe other editors have some suggestions.

I don't think you have violated WP:BLP. I'm no expert on this, but I think a "Provost and Vice President for Academic Affairs" meets WP:Notability (academics) but it might be a good idea to find a reliable independent source that talks about her so that your article meets the standard of WP:GNG. What counts as an independent source is a contentious issue in Wikipedia, but I would suggest that it shouldn't come from either her or the University of North Texas.

I hope that is helpful.

Yaris678 (talk) 18:48, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

treezy musician

please dont delete my page —Preceding unsigned comment added by Money561 (talk • contribs) 20:29, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

It has been deleted. Please a look at WP:MUSICBIO for the notability guidelines for music people. It would appear that the subject is not notable per these guidelines. – ukexpat (talk) 20:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello Design

Hello Design

This is an article about design agency Hello Design, in California. Please review this article.

Helloscott99 (talk) 20:32, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

See comments at #hello design, above. DES ^(talk) 21:20, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

David Newman aka Durga Das (Chant Artist)

Hello,

I posted an article about musician David Newman a few months ago in my userspace. At that time I was advised to wait until his next album came out on the Nettwerk label since he would then meet notability requirements. That album is coming out in a few weeks so I've made a few edits and would like to get the ball rolling again. If anyone has any input, thanks in advance!

Here is the article: David Newman aka Durga Das (Chant Artist)

AmaruKR (talk) 23:07, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Having an interest in the world of chant generally, I read through the proposed article and checked for Newman and Durga Das on line. The text of the article is pretty much all based on personal websites and social media. I was unable to find a third-party source beyong the one Yoga magazine and it seems to be more pr than anything else. Until there are reviews of the albums or the studio in WP:RS, which might occur after the new album which is still in the porudction process, this appears to be a local musician/entrepreneur looking for WP publicity. I would say certainly not yet; the subject needs to have more more prominence than he has right now. If you have a careful read through Wikipedia's guidelines for notability in musicians, you will see that this individual meets none of the tests as far as I can tell. Bielle (talk) 23:22, 22 February 2010 (UTC)

Hi Bielle,

Thank you for taking a look and for your feedback.

One of the guidelines for notability is "Has released two or more albums on a major label or one of the more important indie labels (i.e., an independent label with a history of more than a few years and a roster of performers, many of which are notable)" which I believe is applicable here since Newman's new album is being released through Nutone/Nettwerk, as was his last. The latest album was produced by a Grammy-award winning producer, who is also listed on WP. In addition, though chant is certainly a niche genre that will never get mainstream air time, there are other kirtan artists on WP who are also now making music through Nettwork/Nutone.

Would it help to have more review articles referenced for past albums? I did not do so since a lot of the information was repeat or strictly reviews of albums.

A few more points that might help the case: Newman has been putting albums out since 2003. In 2004 his second album was reviewed on NPR. In 2008 he was mentioned in an article called "Yoga Rock Stars" in Yoga+Joyful Living Magazine.

In any case thanks again for taking the time. I won't say the impetus for this article is devoid of promotional considerations but I have tried to make it objective and do want to respect the WP guidelines. I wouldn't submit an article if I didn't believe the person belonged here. However, if the consensus is to wait, I will.

Best,

AmaruKR (talk) 16:59, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

I appreciate your work and your interest, AmaruKR. However, I am still not seeing notable here as WP defines it for musicians; "at least" ia an absolute minimum standard. If there is some press in a major publication about the person, that might be helpful; the Yoga magazine is more pr than news, I think, and so is much of the writing still. As for the albums, if they get significant coverage, they might warrant an article with a paragraph on the musician, but I am not even seeing the grounds for that yet. This is just my opinion. Others' opinions are welcome. Bielle (talk) 17:05, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

oscar's grind

Please review oscar's grind Goodgrant (talk) 00:22, 23 February 2010 (UTC)goodgrant

I started a copyedit but then discovered that the page was a copyright violation of this website. Please see the message I left on your talk page.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 01:27, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

VertiKa

I started the page VertiKa and revised it after first review and seek another. --Ewikiwriter (talk) 13:07, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Just read through your article, and I think it's pretty good. There's plenty of references and reliable sources in there, and the structure makes it really easy for me to read and find out the important information. However, I would say with the 'history' section that you could perhaps put the dates in bold and separate the sections a bit more. Apart from that, I think it's a really well written article! Please ask if you require any more opinions on the article. Chevymontecarlo (talk) 16:18, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA)

This is my first posting to Wikipedia and I'd appreciate your feedback. I've read the tutorial and many of the other help pages, so hopefully I've got it right.

A great deal of the reference material is personal knowledge, having been involved with the association for the past 14 years as Membership Chair and Secretary. I was involved in coordinating the 50th anniversary celebration and used some of the information gathered from members and former members for the historical data.

Please check out the Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA) Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA) Wikipedia entry.

Thank you for your time,

Coolorie (talk) 16:29, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Your conflict of interest is obvious, and is reflected in the advertising-like, promotional nature of the current draft. --Orange Mike | Talk 20:33, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Tera-play

Would appreciate feedback on a new article that I'm working on at User:JessicaTLV/Tera-play. I'm a new editor, this is my first article, so I have done the tutorial and read numerous articles on how to write articles. I'd appreciate any help or advice on both improving my article and ensuring that it is not at risk for deletion. I've also created a talk-page for the draft at User_talk:JessicaTLV/Tera-play Thanks for your help! JessicaTLV (talk) 17:28, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Unfortunately, it is replete with problems.

• You probably see the banner noting it has no references, and you might think that it does, with two entries in the reference section. However, both are link within Wikipedia. Such links are highly encouraged, but not as references. References are always external to Wikipedia. It may seem odd, but Wikipedia does not qualify as a reliable source, Again, internal links are fine, but not in the form of references.
• You need to establish that the term "Tera-Play" is used by reliable sources. I did a quick search of news outlets here and came up with nothing. Doesn't mean there aren't any, but they need to be found.
• I agree with the banner noting is sounds like and advertisement. It isn't always easy to put a finger on exactly what that means, but phrases like "Tera-play is the next generation of connectivity" sounds more PR than encyclopedic.
• "corld" should be "world" (fixed)
• "Triple-play" shouldn't be Wikilinked, as it doesn't appear to be related to baseball. Perhaps you meant Triple play (telecommunications). (I'll fix it, as it is easier to fix than explain, but look at what I did, so you see how to do it.)
• Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for more help on referencing. --SPhilbrickT 23:01, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

Edgar Blazona

Edgar Blazona Hello, I welcome all feedback on this new article I created. Please let me know where and how I can improve. Thanks! Taramelinchuk (talk) 18:09, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

WIkipedia on DJ Enuff

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dj_enuff Missgigi (talk) 22:29, 23 February 2010 (UTC) please let me know if this reads correctly and is properly done..want to avoid it getting deleted again —Preceding unsigned comment added by Missgigi (talk • contribs) 21:36, 23 February 2010 (UTC)

• You need to establish Notability with reliable sources. None of your references are formed properly, see WP:CITE and footnotes for help.
• The first item in your list of references is a bad link.
• I only looked at some of the entries in your reference section, I didn't see any that appeared to qualigy as reliable sources. --SPhilbrickT 00:50, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
• You'll also want to check out Wikipedia:MUSIC, which lays out the specific criteria of notability for musicians.--SPhilbrickT 00:53, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Thank all issues have been corrected ie notability, links fixed and references. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Missgigi (talk • contribs) 01:48, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

[ACEC California] "ACEC California" Request for Feedback

[ACEC California]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ACEC_California

content
bg
The American Council of Engineering Companies of California (ACEC California) is a statewide of engineering and surveying firms dedicated to enhancing the consulting engineering and land surveying professions, protecting the general public and promoting use of the private sector in the growth and improvement of California.[1] The ACEC California membership provides engineering, surveying, construction management and environmental consulting services for all project phases. As of February 2010 the membership includes nearly 1100 civil, structural, geotechnical, electrical and mechanical engineering and land surveying firms. The member firms provide services for all types of public works, residential, commercial and industrial projects. In November 2000 the California voters by a wide margin approved Proposition 35, a landmark measure sponsored by ACEC California. Prop 35 was endorsed by hundreds of organizations representing taxpayers, seniors, schools, local governments, business, labor, and engineers and almost unanimously by California’s newspapers. This measure authorized state and local governments to engage in public/private partnerships with qualified engineers like those represented by ACEC California to speed up the delivery of transportation, water, education, energy, housing and many other public works projects.[2][3] Since the passage of Prop 35 ACEC California continues to work with California officials to develop new, more ways to deliver vital new infrastructure quickly, efficiently and cost effectively. Members of the public can find California based engineering and surveying firms through an online, searchable database at www.acec-ca.org. [edit]References ^ www.acec-ca.org/?pid+39 ^ www.smartvoter.org/2000/11/07/ca/state/prop35/ ^ www.fkassociates.com/prop35.html

—Preceding unsigned comment added by AndrewNeilly (talk • contribs) 00:28, 24 February 2010 (UTC) 

Your references are not properly formed, see WP:CITE and footnotes for help.

You need to establish why this organization is notable. YOu can read Notability which will suggest finding references to the organization in reliable sources.

Remember, the organization may seem obviously notable to you, but it isn't so obviously notable to others. Sometimes, similar sounding organizations might have very different levels of notability. You have to help us by showing that it is notable.--SPhilbrickT 01:04, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Might need to take a look at WP:SPAM as well. -Reconsider! 01:21, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Rob Snyder (Robert Lloyd Snyder)

Rob Snyder (Robert Lloyd Snyder)

Biography of Rob Snyder.

Brendasimpler (talk) 14:15, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Mr Snyder is not really well known except for his leadership of Stream Energy - at least the article as it stands does not say anything else he is notable for. So instead of creating an article about him, you should add a paragraph on him to the Stream Energy article. This is common practice in business-related articles. I hope you are not part of any attempt to use the encyclopedia to promote the company. If you aren't, please accept my apologies. Itsmejudith (talk) 14:26, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Laimes

A new page on Laimes a venacular building type of Upper Silisia --AnnaSomerset (talk) 16:23, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

You mean Laimes (User:AnnaSomerset/Laimes), not Laimes. If your article turns out to be acceptable, we'll work out how to avoid the confusion, for example, the article you are working on might become Laimes(building).--SPhilbrickT 17:15, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

User:Bass500/Shallcross

Shallcross is a town in Derbyshire. Named after an ancient stone cross, it was once a stop on the Cromford and High Peak Railway line. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Bass500 (talk • contribs) 18:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

A good start. Spelling: scenery. Are you sure that the area was settled by Danes after the Norman Conquest? This point really needs a reference, anyway. You shouldn't reference Wikipedia in the way you do in your final reference. Your sources should be independent ones. Links to WP articles can go in the text as internal links, or at the end in a See also section. Itsmejudith (talk) 13:15, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Astro Solo

The Astro Solo is a new vehicle mentioned on several automotive blogs. I've put together some basic facts and a link to the company website.

Jwakeman (talk) 19:33, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Interesting. The pictures in the two references do not appear to be the same vehicle. One clearly shows solar cells, the other does not. The side panels are shaped differently. Any thoughts?--SPhilbrickT 20:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

Kathryn Wallace

Kathryn Wallace is an American film and print journalist. Please review and let me know if this person is notable enough and what else I might need to move to mainspace. Link to article is here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Joeistaller/Kathryn_Wallace

Joeistaller (talk) 01:06, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Not a bad start, although I would suggest a review of the external links and the in-text links. Also, the "Inside Guantanamo" section does not appear to be entirely relevant. -Reconsider! 01:32, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Glencadia

My town had a nice name, Glencadia. I wanted to set up a place to clear up why the word is floating around the area but is no longer the name of the town. Apologies if I did not follow all guidelines.˜˜˜˜ —Preceding unsigned comment added by Willpflaum (talk • contribs) 02:36, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

You would need to add reliable sources to establish notability. I think a better solution would be to merge this info into Stuyvesant, New York and then redirect it there. If you do merge this info it will need to be established through reliable sources that Stuyvesant Falls was once called Glencadia because at this point the external links do not establish this. The article at this point does not even establish that this name is notable or that the hamlet of Stuyvesant Falls is notable. ~~ GB fan ~~ ^talk 02:50, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Create Synchronicity

Hello world!

I've just created the Create Synchronicity Wikipedia article, describing briefly the backup application bearing that name. Since I'm it's developer, it may not be totally objective, although I tried to be as Neutral as I could. The application is growing int terms of user base, and I thought it deserved its entry on the List of backup software page. As the software needed to have its own article to appear on the list, I created the article to.

Create Synchronicity has been written about by many sources, in many different languages. It was recently updated to version 3.0, and already appears in the French Wikipedia.

Could you please review this article? I'm pretty new to creating fully new articles.

Thanks a lot! CFP. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cfpcompte (talk • contribs) 14:30, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

There is at least one mistake in the article it curently says, "Its development started in June 2010." I am not sure what date belong there.

Currently the article does not explain why it is significant it just states the software exists and what features it has. I would suggest you read through the notability guideline, Wikipedia:Notability. The main thing you will need to do is add references from reliable sources to the information in the article so that it can be verified. It looks liek you have a good start on the article, it just needs to be expanded with references. Hope this helps. ~~ GB fan ~~ ^talk 15:34, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

[[[GB fan]] has indeed commented a lot on this article. Could somebody please review the changes that I made to satisfy his demands? Cfpcompte (talk) 00:34, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

I am sorry if you feel like I demanded you do anything. You asked for an opinion on the article and I gave it. Orangemike has also reviewed it and felt it was lacking enough that the article should be deleted. ~~ GB fan ~~ ^talk 01:40, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Sorry for my previous comment, I basically missed your answer. It is nice to suggest ways to improve the article. I've corrected the date problem, and added other references. What do you think of it now, and what remains to improve? Cfpcompte (talk) 08:55, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

I suggest you remove the links in the article that go back to the projects sourceforge site, it's release notes, or any web pages that automatically collect and publish data about the code. What you need are more links like the karp review (although that one's not a great reference, it's better than the others). Not all software packages are notable--I think you have a tough row to hoe here. I think you would be best off to start by adding this project to the List of backup software article. Nuujinn (talk) 21:17, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

Hamilton Bradshaw

I have created a page about the UK private equity firm Hamilton Bradshaw. Here is the link to the page I have made in my userspace: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CodyJDick/Hamilton_Bradshaw

I believe the page has the quality required to go live. However I would REALLY APPRECIATE if the page could be reviewed. I will gladly listen to suggestions and accept edits. Thanks for your time.

CodyJDick (talk) 15:08, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

E-Z Pack Manufacturing

Please let me know if the article: Tkincolorado/E-Z Pack Manufacturing, meets your criteria for publishing to Wikipedia. Thank you for your time. -Tom Kennedy (tkincolorado) 2/25/2010 Tkincolorado (talk) 19:04, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Sorry, but it comes across as too promotional.

Please see WP:CORP for guidelines on what is needed for an article on a company to be included.--SPhilbrickT 22:08, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Shallcross

Shallcross Shallcross is a town in Derbyshire, England Bass500 (talk) 19:05, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

i like your show

i feal that you cover teens having babies great although i am a male father who was with my girlfriends and tryed raising my children , you should also look into having a show on the male side when a woman tryies to allienat you has a father from your child this has happen to me three times i want to show peop[le what i go threw on the male side <redacted> tree —Preceding unsigned comment added by 71.20.46.225 (talk) 19:05, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

Hello. I suspect, based on your question, that you found one of our roughly three million articles, and thought that we were directly affiliated in some way with that subject. Please note that you are at Wikipedia, the free online encyclopedia that anyone can edit, and this page is a help desk for asking questions related to using the encyclopedia. Thus, we have no inside track on the subject of your question. You can, however, search our vast catalogue of articles by typing a subject into the search field on the left hand side of your screen. If you cannot find what you are looking for, we have a reference desk, divided into various subject areas, where asking knowledge questions is welcome. Best of luck. --SPhilbrickT 20:05, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

The Invisible Thieves

The Invisible Thieves is a description of a case of attempted extortion, bombing, and murder that occurred in Madison County, Illinois, in January of 1901. Three men were eventually tried and one convicted.

MarshaEns (talk) 19:43, 25 February 2010 (UTC)Marsha L. Ensminger, 25 Feb 2010

Fascinating.

• It will no doubt not surprise you that Wikipedia articles rarely rely solely on references that are not available online, but it is not a requirement that they be online. (Sorry about the multiple negatives). One worry I had was how to confirm the basic story, but this (sort of) online link from the Atlanta Constitution will both help satisfy that concern and add to your point about widespread coverage.
• Wikipedia articles except for stubs, are not generally written as a single section. I don't have a lot of useful advice beyond breaking out a WP:LEAD, but check out Article Layout and see if there is a natural way to have a lead followed by two or three sections.
• I didn't like the phrasing "said that" (used twice). Is it really necessary, or can it be written in a more straightforward way.
• The External Link was a placeholder in the Wizard for you to add any if you had any. I removed it,
• I made a tiny grammatical change.
• Nice work, I won't be surprised if this article is challenged for inclusion, but I hope it survives.
• I fixed the link to the article --SPhilbrickT 21:35, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

The Little Lost Child

Please review The Little Lost Child. Thank you, Peter (talk) 04:26, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

I like your article, the pictures you have added are great and there's plenty of citations and references to what you've stated. However, I think you should organise the article a bit more, especially in the second paragraph, such as a section about each of the writers, and another section about the history. The first paragraph is great though, it sums the article up really well. Hope my review helps. Chevymontecarlo. 16:58, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Gamma Phi

Was hoping to get some feedback on my new article, Gamma Phi. This is my first article to write, and while the information is all from the same source, the purpose was to consolidate a lot of information into one relatively small article. No rush on the review, but I'd be glad to have it looked over, especially for any violations or other potential warnings.

To whomever reviews this--thanks in advance for your time. :-) --Warbirdadmiral (talk) 05:23, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Slobodan origins

I am trying to research the Family surname Slobodan. From what I have found, it was dirived from the word Sloboda which ment freedom or Peace. I know that the name Slobodan is a very comon firts name but from what I read and understand from speaking to people in the so called "Old Country" the name Slobodan is rare as a last name. My family came over from Galicia, Austria in 1909 and setteled in Canada. Can someone please more information on the last name Slobodan and where it may have originated. Thanks, Terrill Slobodan —Preceding unsigned comment added by Slobodan1 (talk • contribs) 15:13, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

That's not really the purpose of this page, which is to review draft articles created by editors. You may do better by asking at one of the Reference Desks, where they specializing in answering questions like this. I'm not quite sure which on is best, you might start with Wikipedia:Reference desk/Humanities, and I suspect they'll let you know is another one is better.--SPhilbrickT 18:38, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Please check this article for publication

Jo Hamilton (musician)

Hello

I have comprehensively referenced this article, as well as adding a photograph of the artist.

I need the thumbnail to be accepted as I have reduced its size considerably.

Please contact me regarding this

Thanks

Shelley Atkinson —Preceding unsigned comment added by Artsdeville (talk • contribs) 16:18, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

Dice.com

Hello, I just created an article for Dice.com. Dice is the leading IT recruiter in the United States and has also provided industry reports that have been published by Reuters. The article is here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Athard/dice.com. Please look at it and let me know if this is good enough for Wikipedia. Thank you.

Athard (talk) 18:47, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Jordanmakesmusic/Faces_On_Film

I made a page for the band Faces on Film. Since it's my first page, general feedback would be appreciated. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Jordanmakesmusic (talk • contribs) 21:45, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

p-derivations

A map type of map in differential algebra that is used to prove diophantine results. Anyone with a background in abstract algebra can review it. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 97.123.25.21 (talk) 21:56, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

• I made a couple small fixes.
• Someone has added tags noting that the article has no WP:LEAD and needs a better introduction. A good lede could solve both issues.
• The external link is subscription only - not having a subscription, I cannot determine whether it should be in here, but per WP:ELNO (see item 6) probably not.
• Many mathematical articles do not follow current practice regarding referencing. Presumably because many of them were created years ago, before referencing guidelines were written. I don't know whether they have been grandfathered, and new articles should comply, or if the community accept that math article will not be properly referenced. If I find discussion of this point, I'll pass it along—at this time, I'm just noting that it doesn't meet my referencing standards.
• You said An example such lift could.... Did you mean An example of such a lift could...
• Your reference (Buium) lists 1998 as a publication date. Are you sure it isn't 2005?
• Did you consider mentioning the quotient field in your second example?
• My algebra is very rusty. I hope someone else will take a look. --SPhilbrickT 01:58, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

Akhil Bharat Vivekananda Yuva Mahamandal

Please review my article on Akhil Bharat Vivekananda Yuva Mahamandal which is an Indian youth organization with about 250 centres in several States of India and drawing thousands of Indian young men every year to the ideals of self development and national reconstruction put forward by the Patriot-Prophet of modern India, Swami Vivekananda. This organization has been working since 1967 and did a considerable amount of educational and philanthropic work. It has been blessed by the respected senior monks of the Ramakrishna Math and Ramakrishna Mission. I have used the website of the Akhil Bharat Vivekananda Yuva Mahamandal for most references.

The Voice of the Mahamandal (talk) 16:45, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

In other words, this is an advertisement for an organization, written by an advocate for the organization, and sourced to the website of the organization! Wikipedia is not here to tell the world about your noble cause! --Orange Mike | Talk 18:39, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

Jim Lord, Singer/songwriter

Jim Lord, Singer/songwriter Jim Lord, singer/songwriter requesting feedback on article. Lord is considered by many to be "one of the best artists you hear little about" (source: CHIC Magazine, Music Notes, January 1983 Issue, P.9). He was a singer/songwriter in the 70's/80's, influenced by the British folk scene, recorded a couple of successful albums but changed career tracks in the mid-80's to pursue a career in photojournalism, where he was a very successful, award winning, wartime photojournalist particularly known for his work in Nicaragua and Guatemala during the civil wars in those areas on the 1980s (the information on his photojournalism career is NOT included in his musicians bio page, but for your edification). Lord returned to his singer/songwriter roots in early 2000's and is currently working on an album, scheduled for release later in 2010.

Thanks for taking time to review Lord's singer/songwriter bio.

Jdlongshot2 (talk) 18:21, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

NatalieWynnePace

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:HeatherSophia/NatalieWynnePace

```` HeatherSophia February 27, 2010

FYI: I haven't put in her rock and roll years yet, but I plan to once I find more links to support her work there. —Preceding unsigned comment added by HeatherSophia (talk • contribs) 00:35, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

Well, I personally don't think she herself is notable, and the article doesn't contain very good references. Links to personal home pages, to youtube, and esp links to a site owned by the subject of a biographical article are not good sources, see Biographies of Living Persons for more information. Mere lists of interviews and speaking engagements do not really establish notability and do not really contribute much information to the article. The link to http://www.womensfoundca.org/site/pp.aspx?c=aqKGLROAIrH&b=4993029&printmode=1#LADC might help if it mentioned her, but I do not see any information about her located there. What you need are articles from reputable magazines and newspapers, books, or the like. The article is also very promotional in tone, and lacks a neutral point of view. Sections also appear to be directly copied from press releases on external web sites, eg: http://vanguardpress.net/book.php?isbn=9781593154912, http://www.everythingfinanceblog.com/2009/01/book-review-put-your-money-where-your.html. I'm pretty sure that's a violation of copyright. I'm sorry I can't think of anything good to say about this article, but I can't. Nuujinn (talk) 21:08, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

Joey Allcorn

Page for indie alt-country artist Joey Allcorn[7], singer/songwriter from Columbus, GA who's collaborators include Hank III, Don Helms, Lloyd Green and Johnny Hiland. This is my first attempt at Wikipedia authoring; let me know what you think. Thanks, Dr. Magnifico

Village Roots Garden

Thank you in advance for your time and consideration. I've just completed my 1st Wikipedia aricle ever, on community gardening at User:VitusKonter/VillageRoots. Please let me know how it looks. VitusKonter (talk) 07:27, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

It looks really well done, nice organization nice pictures, nice layout, so it pains me to report that it may not meet the Notability requirements. I hope it does, but you should search for more examples of coverage in reliable sources.--SPhilbrickT 16:14, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

If it doesn't meet notability, see esp WP:LOCAL, then perhaps it should added to the Bay View, Milwaukee article. Nuujinn (talk) 20:50, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

User:NotableCheckertools/Sarey (singer)

How can i improve this article any help? Feel welcome to change the article to improve the quality. (NotableCheckertools (talk) 19:15, 28 February 2010 (UTC))

/User:Wikiwhackjack/KSM_Guitars

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Wikiwhackjack/KSM_Guitars

I would like to publish this article and would like to know if there are any reasons that it would be denied.

Wikiwhackjack (talk) 20:53, 28 February 2010 (UTC) Chris Lott, 2/28/10

You haven't established why these guitars are Notable. You need to show that they are discussed in multiple reliable sources. So far, you have zero sources.

It will help (but not be sufficient) to show that notable musicians use the guitar. While you have listed two, you've haven't cited any references to verify that they do own the guitars.--SPhilbrickT 23:47, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

One Step Away (band)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One_Step_Away_(band)

One Step Away (band)

Please give feedback on the article written on One Step Away band. They are a Pop Rock band hailing from Boston Massachusetts. They have been around since 2007 and will be around for many years to come. We really appreciate your help in this!

Musicroad (talk) 02:52, 1 March 2010 (UTC)musicroad Feb 28, 2010

Great Melbourne Telescope

User:Rgillespie/Great Melbourne Telescope

Rgillespie (talk) 03:56, 1 March 2010 (UTC) Richard Gillespie 1 March 2010

First, I'll note this is the type of article I enjoy seeing added to WP. However, there are some challenges to overcome.

You've provided references, but not in the required format. See WP:CITE for help. Additionally, it is not sufficient to merely list the references, you have to provide footnotes to identify which references support which claims. See footnotes.

I'm surprised at the claim that this was the second largest telescope at the time. While it was obviously smaller than the Rosse, it may also have been smaller than Herschel's telescope. (Here, we may have to do some sleuthing, as 40-foot telescope identifies it as a 48 inch, but List of largest optical telescopes historically identifies it as 49.5 in. This is one reason why it would help to see the specific reference, to help sort this out.

I wikilinked a few terms.--SPhilbrickT 00:16, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Smoked Bear

Please provide feedback on a short article describing a public education campaign called Smoked Bear. Once I find the text or an MP3 of the radio spot(s) mentioned in the article, I will also include them on the article page.

Thanks in advance for any reviews. TnCom (talk) 04:59, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

You linked to one article about the campaign, but I've found no other mention of the campaign, so I'm worried that it would not survive a proposal to delete on the basis of lack of Notability. Are there other discussions of this campaign in reliable sources?

Please do not copy the entire text of the campaign, as it is almost certainly a violation of Copyright. You may be able to use excerpts, but even that has to be done with care. An MP3 of the campaign is also almost certainly a copyright violation. You are free to investigate getting permission, but let's see if you can satisfactorily establish Notability first.

Sorry I can't be more positive.--SPhilbrickT 00:29, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

I agree with SPhilbrick, I only found the one reference on google. It sounds like this is the personal mission of one indvidual at this point. Nuujinn (talk) 00:34, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

24SevenCart

24SevenCart Shomikz (talk) 06:16, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

You need to establish Notability, by showing this product is discussed in multiple reliable sources, which you support with references.--SPhilbrickT 00:34, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Green Horizon Magazine

I'd be interested in having this article reviewed Green Horizon Magazine

Stevewelzer (talk) 08:13, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

You need to establish Notability, by showing this product is discussed in multiple reliable sources, which you support with references.--SPhilbrickT 00:39, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Sven Windahl

Hi, Just created a page on Swedish professor of communications Sven Windahl. This is my first Wikipedia article, so I hope someone out there will be able and willing to provide some constructive feedback.

Brainfu (talk) 10:32, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

FANTASTIC MAN magazine

Hello I created an article for Fantastic Man magazine last week and it does not seem to be live yet. I suppose it still needs feedback. I'm having a hard time with the whole Wikipedia submission process -- it is very convoluted if you ask me -- but from what I can tell, my article still needs to be reviewed. I'm eager to get it live so if someone can help me out, I would really appreciate it...

Thanks!

Matthew Stewart Matty stewart (talk) 12:54, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

It is live as Fantastic Man (magazine). I made some minor edits. When you reference a website you need to provide a brief title for the website, not just a link. See what I did with the New York Times reference. Anyway, a good start and OK as a stub article. Itsmejudith (talk) 13:58, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

Alex Hibbert

User:TinTin7/New article name here

hiding draft text

Hello, Below is the updated version of Alex Hibbert's wikipedia page. I would much appreciate some feedback and hope all is adequate before it goes live. Thank you very much! Alex Hibbert is a polar expedition leader, outdoor photographer, athlete and zoologist. In 2008 he broke the record, along with his teammate George Bullard, for the longest unsupported polar expedition in history. At 21 years old Alex led the 1374 mile, over 113 day Tiso Trans-Greenland Expedition. Alex Hibbert wrote the story of his expedition in his book The Long Haul which will be published by Tricorn Books on March 15th, 2010. [edit] References <http://www.tricornbooks.co.uk/menu-reviews} <http://www.londonspeakerbureau.co.uk/alex_hibbert.aspx] <http://www.wideworldmag.co.uk/features/alex-hibbert-s-polar-expeditions} [edit] External links [www.alexhibbert.com ]

TinTin7 (talk) 13:15, 1 March 2010 (UTC)March 1st, 2010

Claire Buchar

I would appreciate any feedback on the following article

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Claire_Buchar

Many thanks —Preceding unsigned comment added by TinaEPO (talk • contribs) 15:09, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

Mark Moffett

This is my first article (though someone kindly did an article about me), an article about a distinguished explorer/photographer/expert on insect behavior, who is a top photographer for National Geographic and distinguished former student of E. O. Wilson. User: Rocordman/Mark Moffett is not currently on wikipedia but has given me permission to post an article about him. I also would love to know how to put a photo or two in the article. Feedback/suggestions are welcome. You can reach me directly at ordman@beloit.edu Thanks

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Roc Ordman March 1, 2010---- —Preceding unsigned comment added by Rocordman (talk • contribs) 16:13, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

It's a good start but needs work. I would say that the subject meets the notability guidelines for professors as a former director of the museum at Harvard. That should go in the first sentence. Not "wonderful man". See WP:PEACOCK. Itsmejudith (talk) 12:46, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

User:Tjarrett/Veracode

(Also posted on the New Contributors' Help Page, where they suggested I post here.)

I am an experienced editor with a conflict of interest on an article in my userspace--the article is about my employer. I have made a few passes through it for peacock terms etc and have done my best to establish notability, but would appreciate new eyes on the article to help me weed out any other issues. I'd like to request a review of the article to see if it can be moved to the main article namespace. -Tjarrett (talk) 17:12, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

PeerPong

PeerPong

Please give a general review of newly posted PeerPong Wiki entry. I am looking for ways to improve it.

Thank You! Lforrest11 (talk) 19:20, 1 March 2010 (UTC)Laura Forrest 3/1/2010

The big problem here is notability - as the site is still in private beta it is most unlikely to meet the notability guidelines at WP:WEB nor does the company appear to meet the guidelines at WP:CORP. The website/company may meet the guidelines at some time in the future, but they do not at the moment. I have tagged the article for speedy deletion. Sorry. – ukexpat (talk) 18:53, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Jack Garson

Jack Garson

If anyone could review the above article it would be greatly appreciated!!

Jack Garson (born December 19, 1960) is the founder of Garson Claxton LLC and leads the firm’s business and real estate practice groups. Jack serves as a legal advisor for numerous local, regional and national companies, focusing on business transactions, commercial real estate, commercial leasing, and construction law. He is also a US author of How to Build a Business and Sell It for Millions published by St. Martin’s Press in March 2010.

Thanks!

MegOTMM (talk) 22:06, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

User:Eriktb/Ala Moana Bowls

User:Eriktb/Ala Moana Bowls

Hello, this is my first wikipedia entry. Please give me feedback. Eriktb (talk) 03:40, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Tongal

This article is about the crowdsourcing company Tongal. I'd appreciate any constructive criticism. Thanks for the help.

Fightonfortroy (talk) 04:03, 2 March 2010 (UTC)Fightonfortroy

Edward W. Estlow

Hello, please review [W. Estlow] for inclusion LSClark (talk) 07:56, 2 March 2010 (UTC)LSClark March 2, 2010

It's coming along nicely. In the headings, only capitalize the first word. The Manual of style helps with such things. Make sure you refer to the subject as "Estlow" throughout; avoid chatty phrasing like "Ed and his wife". Don't include the names of his children unless any of them are notable in their own right. Include links to relevant firms and institutions, especially University of Denver, on first mention. When you say "internal university documentation", that may be all right, but we prefer to use sources that other people can check. If you are referring to university web pages, give the URLs. Itsmejudith (talk) 12:41, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Portland (communications)

Portland (communications) (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

Dear All,

I would greatly appreciate it if someone could review this article have written on a PR company. Not the most interesting I know, but the consultancy has links to a fair few British politicians so I think it is of notable interest.

Many Thanks. --Adam Wildman (talk) 09:55, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

I'm not sure the company meets notability requirements, since it appears that the sources cited focus mostly on the people rather than the corporation. See WP:CORP for some more detail. Nuujinn (talk) 23:24, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Robert "Bob" Olszewski, Miniature Figurative Artist (Born: May 2, 1945 - )

User:ROlszewski/Robert Olszewski —Preceding unsigned comment added by ROlszewski (talk • contribs) 15:30, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

This appears (based on your user name) to be an autobiography. Creating an autobiography is strongly discouraged as it is hard to write about yourself from a neutral point of view. The draft is very promotional/non-neutral/unencyclopedic in tone and will need a lot of toning down and rewriting before it can be moved to the mainspace. It will also need more references to reliable sources to demonstrate notability per WP:CREATIVE. If you are the subject, I would suggest that you abandon the draft but ask for it to be created by posting at articles for creation. – ukexpat (talk) 18:32, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Montana Justice Foundation

Montana Justice Foundation

I have recently updated the Montana Justice Foundation page to include links on and to the page. I am hoping for someone to review the article again with these changes in place.

The Montana Justice Foundation is a non for profit organizations that uses IOLTA funds and donations to fund legal aid initiatives around Montana.

Lauren Asprooth (Lauren Asprooth 16:53, 2 March 2010 (UTC)) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Laurenasprooth (talk • contribs)

Before we worry about links, there is a more serious problem. The article needs citations to reliable sources that demonstrate how or why the organization is notable per the guidance at WP:ORG. Without such references, the article is destined to be nominated for deletion. References to the Foundation's website do not qualify as reliable to show notability. There are some formatting issues too: please take a look at {{Infobox non-profit}} to see how to use infobox code correctly; the tables for the executives and directors are not necessary, bulleted lists will do. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 18:45, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

International League of Conservation Writers

International League of Conservation Writers

PattyMaher (talk) 22:38, 2 March 2010 (UTC)Patty Maher

Music_Teachers_Association_of_California

Hi, I would like feedback on my article about the Music Teachers' Association of California, MTAC, at [MTAC]. My article is very similar to the article [MTNA]. When my page is accepted, then a new entry needs to be made in the [MTAC disambiguation] page. Thanks, Lowellwebster (talk) 22:40, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Ramekin Counterpane

Thanks for reviewing my new article on Ramekin Counterpane, the '70s art-rock band from the Southern California desert.

I appreciate your help.

Rememberthe60s (talk) 02:21, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Saying that the band's popularity is comparable to 10cc does not reflect reality. You should have another look at this statement. Also, the quote needs attribution.

Brhodewalt (talk) 03:06, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Carl Moyer Program

Carl Moyer Program

Please give a general review of this recently posted Wiki entry. I want to make sure it is clear and that all citations are noted.

Carl Moyer Program

--Riezebos Holzbaur (talk) 02:37, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

As a preliminary review, right now the article is almost entirely sourced using primary sources. You need secondary sources (also called third party sources) in the article—reliable newspaper articles, documentaries, books, magazine articles—written by people unaffiliated with the program. This type of subject is necessarily going to have to rely to some extent on primary source material but it should not rely on them entirely. Because of the way it's written, it reads like a brochure. When the subject of an article is a person or a company and it reads like this the impression is much worse because promotional on such subjects smacks of self-aggrandizement, wheraes this is a government program—but it still sounds like ad-copy. We strive for neutrally written, balanced articles, giving voice to positive and negative criticism where appropriate. I also imagine you have a conflict of interest; that you are in some way personally involved with this topic, which makes writing a balanced article not only difficult, but usually it is not something the writer wants to do. Right now I could see it being nominated for deletion as promotion.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 03:58, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

The Real Estate Investment Securities Association (REISA)

The Real Estate Investment Securities Association (REISA)

This is original information about a real estate industry trade group. There are currently about 30 of these type of groups listed in Wikipedia, but nothing on REISA. Errors pop up related to the references and am not experienced enough to resolve it. I tried to be neutral and only state the facts. Help me to not make this an advertisement, but an informative piece on what the association is about.

(Investmentconnector (talk) 05:47, 3 March 2010 (UTC))

To Whom This May Concern,

Hello, this is my first real contribution to Wikipedia. Please feel free to edit this so it meets the encyclopedia standard, or help teach me so I can do this myself.

Thanks! —Preceding unsigned comment added by Robsmyth40 (talk • contribs) 07:23, 3 March 2010 (UTC)

Hamilton Bradshaw

The Wikipedia page Hamilton Bradshaw was recently created. Much thanks to the help that has been provided by my peers editing the page. However, as can be noted when viewing the page, there is still work to be done. Specifically, I need help removing the "advert" designation at the top of the page. It was added when the page was more biased than it is now, but I think almost all of the bias has been eliminated. Can someone please review the page and help me to make it sound completely neutral? I would really like to get the "advert" designation removed.

Additionally, to get the page legitimized, the page states that "This page is a new unreviewed article." I would like for a verified Wikipedian to review the site and remove this designation when reviewed. I would love for the site to be legitimized. Thanks for your time.

CodyJDick (talk) 11:17, 3 March 2010 (UTC)