Homer Simpson

Homer Jay Simpson (voiced by Dan Castellaneta) is one of the main characters in the animated television series The Simpsons. The father of the Simpson family, Homer is gluttonous, lazy, and rather simpleminded. His behavior is often absurd, childish, selfish, obnoxious, dangerous, clumsy, and insensitive, but he still remains lovable. Over the years, he has evolved into an icon.

Overview

Template:Spoiler Homer works as a Safety Inspector at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant, in Sector 7G, although "working" in this case refers largely to dozing and eating doughnuts. He spends a great deal of his time at Moe's Tavern with his lifelong friends Barney, Carl, Lenny, and bartender Moe. At home he is often found to be sitting on the sofa mindlessly watching TV while snacking on comfort foods and drinking cans of Duff Beer.

Homer Simpson popularized the annoyed grunt "D'oh!" (made memorable through Dan Castellaneta's distinctive voice work), which began as an abbreviated form of Jimmy Finlayson's "Dooooh" from the films of Laurel and Hardy. This modern interjection has found enough popular acceptance to be included in the Oxford English Dictionary. His dress sense is pretty basic. He usually wears a white shirt with blue pants. He only wears a tie when he's at work. He wears blue pajamas at night. Also, when he's reading or consulting taxes and finances, he wears half-moon reading glasses.

Family

Homer was born and raised in Springfield (though one episode suggests he was born in Toronto, Canada; see Age below). Homer is:

• the second son of Abraham "Abe" J. Simpson and first son of Mona Simpson (sometimes referred to as Penelope Olson);
• the husband of Marjorie Bouvier ("Marge");
• the father of Bart, Lisa, Maggie;
• the half-brother of Herb Powell, whose mother was a carnival worker Abe had a tryst with while she was passing through Springfield; and had sex with Grampa.
• the half-brother of "Abbie," the daughter of a woman whom Abe met while stationed in Britain during World War II.

Age

It has been suggested that Homer's age is 38 years old. In one episode, a quiz indicates he will die at 42 and he wails that he has "only three years to live" (it should be noted that Homer or Marge's mental arithmetic may not be reliable). Various episodes have given his date of birth as 12 January, 1956; 12 May, 1956; 10 May, 1955; and 20 March, 1955; and even 17-23-1956 [sic] (Whacking Day is also on May 10, which causes Homer's birthday to go uncelebrated—even by Homer. It should also be noted that in a later episode only he remembers his birthday, claiming it is the same as Santa's Little Helper's; this, however, would contradict how the dog came to be part of the family. In 1969, when his mother became a radical, he is estimated to be about 8 years old, yet, in July, 1969, during the moon landings, he is about 18 years old (estimate due to the song in which he claims to have had his first beer at seventeen.) In another episode, he is shown as a toddler at Woodstock, though this inconsistency, as well as many others regarding Homer's age, probably results from the fact that he has not aged in the entire long run of the series. In "Treehouse of Horror XI", Homer claims his sign is Taurus while reading the horoscope section of a newspaper. This corresponds to anyone born between April 20th and May 20th, which would make any birthdates not between those dates invalid, thus May 12 is most likely the correct date. But in "Homer's Paternity Coot," it is revealed that the letter from Homer's "real" father was written in 1966. Apparently, Homer was still in his mother's womb when this was done, meaning he is 40. But "I Married Marge" notes that Bart was conceived in June 1980, and this is further contradicted by the dating of his time as a member of the Be Sharps in "Homer's Barbershop Quartet" (in both instances, Homer is clearly an adult). In "Lisa the Beauty Queen", he tells the man who is guessing his age and weight that his age is 36 and he weighs 239 pounds. To further complicate things, in the 2006 episode "We're on the Road to D'ohwhere," he exclaims: "I'm 38 years old and... one Snickers pie away from getting my right foot amputated because of diabetes!" He's most likely 36, because in the book 'The Simpsons: A complete Guide to Our Favourite Family it claims he is 36 at the start of the book, when there are descriptions of each family member.

Address

Homer and his family probably live at 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Several alternative house numbers on Evergreen Terrace are given in various episodes, including 59, 94, 182, 555, 723, 743, 763, 1042 and 1094, in addition to 430 Spalding Way. Yet it is well documented that the most common address used is 742, Evergreen Terrace. Once, a map showed that East Springfield, where the Simpsons live, was in Louisiana (also confirmed by an episode where Homer is elected king of Mardi Gras), while West Springfield, a massive oil mining facility where Homer and Lenny once ran away to, is in Texas.

The house across the street was a brief home to retired U.S. President George H.W. Bush and his wife Barbara. It was then sold to retired U.S. President Gerald Ford, who may still reside there.

In the 299th episode Homer's email address was given to be chunkylover53@aol.com. The show's writer-producer Matt Selman registered the address before the episode aired. He has since replied to fans who emailed in following that episode.

Personality

Homer's essential personality traits presented themselves early on. He was raised solely by his father after the approximate age of 6. Homer slid through his classes and apparently graduated despite not passing Remedial Science until some 20-plus years later. His senior yearbook reveals a lack of interest in sports and activities, and his quote was "I can't believe I ate the whole thing." In high school, Homer fell in love with Marge Bouvier, whom he would later marry (though both would later learn they had first met while children at summer camp). Following the completion of Remedial Science, Homer entered Springfield Heights Institute of Technology and graduated due solely to illicitly changed grades. His education was further buttressed by Clown College, Bodyguard School, Successmanship 101, Santa training, the Lanley Institute of Monorail Conducting, and mandatory Family Skills courses.

His short attention span complements his intense (albeit short-lived) passion for hobbies, enterprises or causes. Although by nature an exceedingly lazy man, he is capable of exerting tremendous effort toward something, if only for short periods of time. This is described in his own words: "When I'm passionate about something, I see it through to the end." He has converted his garage into a bar, just to spite his local bartender, Moe Szyslak; spent a whole episode studying and emulating Thomas Edison; convinced all of Springfield that the Rapture was imminent; and attempted to uncover a plot to trade Springfield's baseball team interstate by going on a hunger strike. These massively spirited endeavors can be triggered by almost nothing, as evidenced by his short-lived grease collection business.

Health issues

Homer is incredibly lucky to be alive. He once gained an extra 61 pounds on top of his already obese frame to get on disability. He has broken almost every bone in his body, been shot numerous times and received countless cuts and bruises, both major and minor. Homer has also encountered many injuries; the whole list of which is available on the talk page. Homer has been rendered nearly sterile from prolonged exposure to toxic materials at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant.

Homer's brain is cushioned by a unique and eponymous genetic condition: "Homer Simpson's syndrome." This allowed him to take several consecutive punches without falling over. Moe even trained Homer for boxing (with hobos), although Homer's boxing career ended when he was nearly killed by Drederick Tatum (who is much stronger than a hobo).

Homer's brain also has a crayon in it - placed there when he shoved it up his nose as a child. It was later removed by a doctor, but replaced by Moe the bartender ("Yes, I'm a surgeon" says his card). While his crayon was removed, he struggled with his higher intellect (110) and found he was isolated from his social group.

Homer also suffers from several congenital conditions – most obviously male pattern baldness, but also a male "Simpson" stupidity gene, finger stubbiness (abnormally short and thick fingers) and the "Simpson butt" (a rather large rear end, which requires him to wear "balloon seated" pants) – which are genetic and which he has passed on to his children. Homer also appears to have far-sighted vision (on occasion), requiring the use of reading glasses when reading a book or newspaper. He has also been seen putting in contacts which have possibly replaced his glasses.

Homer has bad heart problems from eating too much; he had to have a quadruple bypass operation. This heart problem reoccurs in the series, for example when he is on the tooth chipper.

Height

Homer stands at 6'0" feet (1.83 meters).

Weight

Peak:315 lbs
Current:239 lbs
Although in many episodes, his weight has been 239. He was 261 at one point and decided to shed some pounds. He ended up slimming down to 239 pounds before he went off his strict regimen of diet and exercise due to a snide comment made by Mr. Burns.

Mental acuity

Homer has strangled Bart on many occasions

As widely evidenced, Homer's mind is vacuous, but sprinkled with occasional dense packets of knowledge. He has shown small bursts of astonishing foresight, memory, creativity, and fluency with language (including Japanese, German, Chinese, Spanish, and penguin). He has once posed the question "How come China is communist, and yet I see rudimentary free markets springing up everywhere?" to a bemused Chinese adoption agent. These bursts are almost always temporary, constantly changing, and frequently self-serving. He knows the name of every Ayatollah that has ruled Iran, for example, but only to persuade Marge to let him keep a vulgar T-shirt bearing the logo "Ayatollah Ass-a-hole-a" that she tried to get rid of at a yard sale. He can name several historical Chief Justices of the U.S. Supreme Court, but this may well be because one bears the name of a food product (Warren Burger). He once mentioned Frank Lloyd Wright in perfect context while arguing with Lisa, then confessed he has no idea who Wright was. Still another time, while using a knife to pull out a bullet, he identified all the tissue the knife came in contact with. Homer also has completed a college level course in nuclear physics (although he only obtained it the second time around, after cheating the first time.)

Homer has also displayed a startlingly broad vocabulary, having spent several nights asleep with an "Improve Your Vocabulary" cassette playing. Sadly, the cassette was sent to him in error instead of the "Lose Weight In Your Sleep" cassette he had actually ordered. Bart has often been frustrated by Homer's subsequent employment of English which included the observation "Now there's a Machiavellian countenance" (on seeing Bart's face) and "Ooh! A sextet of ale!" (on discovering six cans of Duff beer in his refrigerator). After Lisa explained the mix up, Homer threw the offending cassette away exclaiming "Disingenuous mountebanks with their subliminal chicanery! A pox on thee!"

The nature of this sporadic intellect is manifold and largely useless as well as transient. He also has musical talent, being able to play the piano and trombone. He is also able to touch-type. Much of his mental ability is suppressed by the presence of a wax crayon in the frontal lobe of his brain, the result of a bizarre childhood mishap. The crayon was removed and Homer became super-intelligent, to the extent that no one wanted to be around him anymore. The crayon was re-inserted at the end of the episode, as he had seemingly become too smart to be happy (which suggests Lisa lives in utter despair). Also credited is the Simpson Gene, which almost guarantees that male Simpsons become underachievers. His stupidity may be exacerbated further by excessive alcohol consumption, exposure to radioactive waste, and repetitive cranial trauma. In one episode, Homer acknowledged that his problems with consistency are due to his repeated head injuries (and then went off topic, further proving this).

Homer is inclined to fall into fantasy, often drifting off into his own world (such as riding the nuclear bomb à la Slim Pickens in Dr. Strangelove, fantasizing about primitive black and white cartoon characters dancing to the tune of "Turkey in the Straw", and the infamous land of chocolate daydream) or perceiving reality in a more personally appealing manner. Some of his dreams appear to be violent parodies of Hanna-Barbera cartoons, including Yogi Bear with Ranger Ned and Bart-Bart ("Gee, Homie, it's not very nice to maul Ranger Ned") and Magilla Gorilla. Other bizarre dreams include being an unborn baby and conversations with God (while asleep in church). Notable are the odd conversations he has with his own brain, typically in an adversarial tone. For example, once he began a conversation with his own mind by declaring "Okay brain, you don't like me and I don't like you...". His liver once spoke to him too, cheering "Yay!" when Homer had been banned from Moe's bar and thus (briefly) depriving him of the ability to drink.

Homer is also prone to becoming very emotional, especially when it comes to his neighbors, the Flanders family, or troubles related to his son, Bart. He has rage issues and has been physically and violently abusive, often towards his son, whom he has strangled and fought with on numerous occasions.

Homer also has an IQ of 55, which makes him mentally retarded. This was established in the episode HOMЯ, where Homer says his IQ was raised 50 points, and later on in the episode, he asks if there's any place for a man with a 105 IQ, which is average. Since this was Smart Homer speaking, it makes no sense. Some people have suggested that both numbers were rounded, which is implausible.

Homer's mental ability is best summed up by this conversation, held with Marge:

Homer: Every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain! Remember when I took that home wine-making course and I forgot how to drive?

Marge: That's because you were drunk!
Homer: And how!

Diet

Homer is particularly fond of doughnuts (especially LardLad Brand) and pork chops, but also pie, bacon, Krusty Burgers, pizza, seafood, American cheese, and especially salt doodles and pork rinds and most of all Duff Beer. He once spent weeks eating a gigantic hoagie long after it went bad, making him deathly ill.

In his gluttony, he has acquired more exotic tastes, such as flowers, Play-Doh, Vaseline, dirt, Lego, pure flour, some novelty plastic lobsters from a salad bar, toxic waste, buttered up bacon, a badly spoiled 12-foot sandwich, dishwashing liquid, the decorative bride and groom from a wedding cake (which he mistook for candy), a lubricated rubber stopper that had been inserted into his mouth just before receiving electroshock, fancy soaps, Marge's lipstick, a package of dry gravy mix he found in a parking lot, men's slacks and as a bet for 50 dollars with Bart, baking soda from the family refrigerator, that according to Marge, "came with the house". He also once was forced to eat all of the memorabilia attributed to his biker gang, the Hell's Satans. That included a jacket, a hat, frisbees, and Pogs. When Homer needed to get a present for mother's day for Marge, he got a carnival candy maker and made a life size ball of pure cotton candy smothered with caramel and deep fried and ate for weeks while it was rotting.

The poor example of his diet is frequently noted. Homer typically responds to food with copious drool and exuberant postures, or saying "mmm... ______" of whatever food he's about to eat or thinking about (not always necessarily food though). A good example of this is when Homer once drooled over Mr. Burns' golf advice for getting his ball out of the sand trap, which was an obvious pun of a popular deli item.

Burns: Use an open-faced club. A sand-wedge! Homer: Mmmm, open-faced club sand-wedge...

He also has his own experiment called "out of this world moon waffles" consisting of waffle batter, caramel candy and liquid smoke baked and wrapped around an entire stick of butter.

Homer drinks large quantities of Duff brand beer, both at Moe's Tavern and at home. He has occasionally experimented with Fudd Beer too, when no Duff is available. In his youth Homer apparently drank a brand called Billy Beer. In one episode he finds a years-old can in the pocket of an old jacket and, of course, drinks it.

Enemies

Being "a people person who drinks," Homer has garnered more than a few lasting enemies. His next-door neighbor, Evangelical Christian and super-nice-guy Ned Flanders, has long provoked Homer's seemingly endless rage and hostility, apparently innocuously. Most notable is deceased co-worker Frank "Grimey" Grimes, whose death was caused, albeit indirectly, by Homer's antics. This naturally resulted in the rancor of the aforementioned's illegitimate son, Frank Grimes, Jr.

Other adversaries of note include:

• Sisters-in-law Patty and Selma Bouvier, whom reciprocate Homer's dislike.
• The Society of No Homers (formerly the Stonecutters)
• Employer Charles Montgomery Burns
• Mobster "Fat Tony."
• Artie Ziff - Marge's old boyfriend
• Springfield University Dean Bobby Peterson (Homer dislikes all college deans, thanks to his misconceptions that such administrators are evil, as portrayed in college movies).
• Former president George H. W. Bush (the two disagreed on Homer's methods of rearing a naughty Bart).
• The Emperor of Japan.
• "the fat little Dixie Chick."
• New York City.
• Springfield Candy Convention
• Springfield A & M
• Shelbyville
• PBS, because Homer failed to make good on his $10,000 pledge, just for the sake of ending the drive.
• The State of Florida.
• Sean Hannity.
• The Hell's Satans biker gang (a parody of the Hell's Angels biker gang)
• Public Transportation
• An "Inanimate Carbon Rod" from "Deep Space Homer," because the stick of carbon, not Homer, was credited for saving a space mission Homer was participating in from disaster.
• A Krusty the Clown killer doll (in the "Treehouse of Horror III" segment "Clown Without Pity," where a Krusty talking doll murderously stalks Homer, but acts normally when anyone else is around. The segment itself was a parody of a "Twilight Zone" episode, "Living Doll.").
• Frank "Grimey" Grimes
• Frank Grimes Jr.
• The Plow King (friend/temporary business adversary Barney Gumble)
• Waylon Smithers
• Rod and Todd Flanders
• Principal Dondelinger
• General Sherman
• Surly Joe
• Rex Banner
• The Queen of England after crashing her coach.
• Britain as Homer attacked the Queen.
• Springfield Sanitation Commissioner Ray Patterson
• The nation and government of Australia
• The French
• "The Boy!" (Bart)
• God

Along with the rest of his family, he is banned from every state in the United States, except North Dakota and Arizona, rejecting the latter because of its perceived funny smell. Despite being banned from those states, Homer and Marge went into all 50 states and Province of Ontario in Canada during the episode Catch 'em If You Can.

Sexuality

He has been kissed by at least two other men (his brief personal assistant Karl, and his openly gay temporary housemate in one episode) and has later wondered whether Marge's kiss is the best he has had that day. During his brief career as an artist he paints Lenny and Carl in the showers, unconvincingly claiming that it is for "art." That said, Homer has also displayed mild homophobia complaining that homosexuals have taken all the toughest American names such as "Bruce and Lance and Julian" and attempting to ensure Bart grows up "straight" by taking him on an unsuccessful deer hunt. He has once expressed an unwillingness to enter one gay bar, but only out of self-consciousness for his appearance. In another episode Homer finds Bart and Milhouse dressing up as girls, and angrily demanding a "non-gay explanation" is delighted to discover that it is because they are drunk. He becomes violent when Bart mentions being "a little attracted to Milhouse." On the other hand, he has also disco danced at another gay bar with his two gay housemates, enjoying it so much that he has taken his shirt off and waved it around his head in rhythm with the music (which prompted a female bystander to remark "I think that made me even more lesbian than before."), as well as been found in a lesbian bar (which he left due to its lack of fire exit) and another time when he was banned from Moe's Tavern. In the episode "Last Exit to Springfield", Homer, who mistakenly believes that Mr. Burns is making sexual advances at him, rejects this by stating: "Sorry, Mr Burns. I don't go in for these backdoor shenanigans. Sure I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious. But the answer is no!" Homer has also fantasized about marrying himself, or replacing Marge by wearing a wig that looks like her hair. In another episode Homer is skiing and tries to remember his lessons but all he remembers is Flanders shaking his butt wearing his skin tight suit and saying "It feels like nothing at all" then Homer says "Stupid Sexy Flanders". He has also admitted to wearing ladies' underwear, which he discussed with Marge to be 'purely a comfort thing.' In spite of all Homer is credited with the creation of the word Homersexual.

Names and aliases

Homer has gone by many names and aliases. While in the Witness Protection Program, the family assumed the surname "Thompson" (which he had a hard time understanding at first). After a crooked PI framed Lisa for a crime, Homer took the alias "Rock Strongo". When he tried to rent a room, the desk clerk asked for his real name, so Homer instead called himself "Lance Uppercut". Homer legally changed his name to "Max Power", which he got off of a blow dryer, for a time to escape public ridicule. He also attempted to change his name to Hercules Rockefeller. He has also been known by many nicknames, including "Homey", "Homina", "Home-boy", "Ho", "Chad Sexington", "Colonel Homer", "Commander Cool", "Dancin' Homer", "Mr. Plow", "Mr. Sparkle", "Hungry, Hungry Homer", "El Homo" (a resemblance of Bart's graffiti "El Barto"), "HomeRun Homer", the "Brick Hit House", the "Southern Dandy", and "Bottomless Pete, Nature's Cruelest Mistake", among others. He once ran a gossip website under the alias "Mr. X." and briefly became a pie-touting super hero called "The Pie Man," and once owned a false driver's license which stated that he was Brian McGee. "Angry Dad", which was based on Homer, was the name of an internet comic character that was created by Bart. Homer's lack of creativity is on display at the Kwik-E-Mart, where a list of banned check-writers includes the names Homer J. Simpson, Homer S. Simpson, H. J. Simpson, Homor Simpson, and Homer J. Fong.

Homer's middle name, "Jay," is a tribute by Simpsons creator Matt Groening to the work of cartoon producer Jay Ward, creator of Bullwinkle J. Moose and Rocket J. Squirrel. At one time Homer knew that his middle initial was "J", but did not know what it stood for. The meaning was revealed to him on a mural that had been painted by his hippy mother when he was a child—the joke being that, in speech, "J" is indistinguishable from "Jay". Abe, Homer and Bart all share this middle initial, though not the name. Groening has stated that he named the core of the Simpsons family (except Bart) after members of his own family (Homer was his father's name). He also acknowledges that Homer Simpson happens to be a character in Nathanael West's The Day of the Locust.

Homer also went by the name Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar when he first met Marge, fearing she would lose interest in him if she were to find out his real name.

Religion

When it comes to religion Homer can’t seem to make up his mind. He’s presumably been a Protestant (Presbylutheran), hedonist, born-again Protestant, Stonecutter, Movementarian (a parody of the Raelians and Scientology) and Catholic — and that was just in his late thirties.

At one point, he was the founder and sole adherent of his own religion, albeit only as a stratagem to avoid going to church on Sundays. This also allowed him to avoid going to work on "religious festivals" such as "The Feast of Maximum Occupancy". However, his new religion was short lived; the Simpson house caught fire and he recanted in fear of an angry God.

He also briefly became a minister after registering on the internet, in order to perform gay marriages for $200 each.

Once, he even proclaimed, "Jesus, Allah, Buddha — I love you all!" and "Save me Jebus!" Furthermore, Homer has had many interactions with God himself, and while developing a flat tax proposal, even accidentally proving God doesn't exist. Furthermore, Homer has extensive knowledge of Iranian theocratic politics and has strong faith in the existence of both Batman and Superman, as well as calling for the aid of Aquaman.

After seeing the movie Left Below, a parody of the novel "Left Behind," Homer tried twice to correctly predict the time and place of the Rapture. The first time, after getting all the citizens of Springfield to believe him, his prediction fell flat. The second time he is right; unfortunately, no one believed him. Homer goes up alone, leaving the rest of his family behind to suffer. When Homer realizes that he was going to have to spend the rest of eternity without his family, he began causing problems by kicking over trashcans in Heaven and interrupting games of tennis, until God finally promised to delay the Rapture in order to get Homer to stop.

Homer also knows that karma can only be portioned out by the Cosmos, and has demonstrated knowledge of Buddhism (if only to elsewhere display ignorance of the first two noble truths of the Buddha).

Bart once threw a waffle up at the ceiling of the Simpsons' home, and as it was covered in maple syrup it stuck to the ceiling for a considerable period of time. Homer was known to stare upwards at the waffle and shout at "God" as he was looking at it. Marge then explained to him that it wasn't "God", just an old waffle, and pulled it down. Homer then proceeded to commit deicide by eating "God", which—to his credit—he admitted to be "sacrilicious".

Rap sheet

Homer has been arrested several times in the duration of the series. Offences range from, speeding, drunk driving, triple-parking in a handicap space and removing an officer's hat, attempted murder of Mr. Burns, bootlegging, tax fraud, kicking a can five times (illegal transportation of litter), bad parenting and grand theft auto. He has also managed to be incarcerated in three different continents. Homer had also framed Marge for a DUI by sliding her over to the driver's seat.

"Pulling a Homer"

The phrase "pulling a Homer" describes "the act of succeeding despite idiocy", created after Homer, with the push of a button, averted a nuclear meltdown that would have destroyed all of Springfield. However, he didn't actually know which button to push, and picked one randomly using 'eenie, meenie, meinie, moe.'

Musical predilection

Homer became a Grammy Award-winning singer as a member of the Be Sharps, as depicted in the episode Homer's Barbershop Quartet (but Homer does not consider the Grammy to be a prestigious music award at all, as shown in many episodes).

Homer is a great fan of The Who, Grand Funk Railroad, Jefferson Airplane, Iron Maiden, Jefferson Starship and The Alan Parsons Project (which he believes is a type of hovercraft), his favorite song is It's Raining Men with The Weather Girls and is usually aghast at others who either don't know or like them. He was once a great fan of Starland Vocal Band, going so far as to get a tattoo to commemorate them, but years later he holds the belief that "they suck!" Homer also appears to enjoy BTO, though only ever wants to hear their hit single Takin' Care of Business. Homer also wrote a highly popular hate-song about Ned Flanders, during the creation of which, he demonstrates his talent for playing the Piano. The piano playing talent also becomes apparent in times of adversity, ie. being whipped by a police officer, and at gunpoint from a skeleton sheriff. And once used the last batteries in their blacked-out house to play a Spice Girls song on his boombox.

Fears

Homer's greatest fear is of sock puppets. He also has frequent night terrors in which he dreams he's being attacked by cobras. He is also scared of Turkish snow cones and spiders.

Past jobs

Further information: List of Homer Simpson's jobs

Guns

Homer owns a wide array of weapons (to Marge's dismay), in numerous episodes he produces a shotgun (once to fight off the boogeyman) that he (apparently) keeps behind the cistern of the toilet in his upstairs bathroom. He also had a gun cabinet near the kitchen in which an M16 and various other rifles presided, he also owned a revolver in one episode (where he claimed it was his first gun). His daughter Maggie also owns a rifle, and has saved Homer on many occasions, though he has never shot anyone. He also had a bolt action rifle on two occasions, one was when he took Bart hunting, and another when he went turkey hunting.

Memorable quotes

• Why do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts.
• Kill my boss? Do I dare to live out the American dream?
• Hey, look at this! I am a weiner. Heh heh, he sure is!
• Kill myself? Killing myself is the last thing I'd ever do. Now I have a purpose. A reason to live. I don't care who I have to face, I don't care who I have to fight, I will not rest until this street gets a stop sign!
• D'oh!
• I AM SO SMART! I AM SO SMART! I AM SO SMART! S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
• (After being caught trying to smuggle a baby panda) But he loves me! (Panda bites him) OW!! Why you endangered little... (begins to strangle the panda)
• Operator! Give me the number for 911!
• Marge, let me handle this. Drunken hicks of the jury...
• It's true...I'm a rageaholic! I just can't live without rageahol!
• (getting into the car after a heavy night at Moe's) I'm in no condition to drive. Wait -- I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk!
• So what're you gonna do now? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths so that when they bark they shoot bees at you?
• Shimatta bakame! (subtitled "D'oh!") (after folding a million-yen note into a origami crane and watching it get blown away by the wind)

Awards and honors

• First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence, 1992 (after sterilization)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Toxic Waste Handler of the Month, 1990
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Employee of the Month, 1991 (after saving Springfield from a nuclear meltdown)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Medal for Bravery, 1995 (after physically plugging a radioactive gas leak)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Belching Contest Winner, 1995 (award later yielded to Jay Sherman)
• Springfield Nuclear Power Plant Children's Model-Building Contest, 1997
• Grammy Award for Outstanding Soul, Spoken Word, or Barbershop Album of the Year, 1987 (Be Sharps)
• Greaser's Café Dance Contest, 1999
• Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor, (Dr. Haing S. Ngor or Don Ameche)
• Springfield Bowling Championship, 1996 (PinPals)
• P.J. O'Harrigan's "Sir Drinks-A-Lot," 1999
• Pulitzer Prize for Journalism, 2000 (as "Mr. X")
• Springfield Olympic Mascot Contest, 1999 (Springy)
• High school reunion awards: "most weight gained," "most hair lost," "most improved odor,","person who travelled the least distance to get here"