Talk:Alex Parrish/GA1: Difference between revisions

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Reviewer: Numerounovedant (talk · contribs) 16:51, 29 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]

You could avoid repetiton of American in the opening paragraph.
Same with FBI, I believe the the "FBI recruit" can simply be "recruit" as the mention of the "FBI Academy" makes it obvious.
"U.S intelligence"
I prefer "on and off relationship" as it is lest colloquial.
"as a completely white character" - completely seems to be an odd choice of words.
Not sure what a "talent holding deal" is.
"For her performance as Parrish" - odd phrasing, also, be consistent with use of "Alex" or "Parish" in the article.

@@ Line 18: / Line 18: @@
 *"For her performance as Parrish" - odd phrasing, also, be consistent with use of "Alex" or "Parish" in the article.
 Looking at the rest. <small><span style="background:#132639; padding:2px">[[User:Numerounovedant|<font color="white">Numerounovedant</font>]]</span><span style="background: #FFD200;padding:2px">[[User talk:Numerounovedant|<font color="black">Talk</font>]]</span></small> 16:47, 3 August 2017 (UTC)
-::*{re|Numerounovedant}} Done.[[User:Krish!|<span style="font-variant:small-caps;color:Red">'''''Krish'''''</span>]] &#124; [[User talk:Krish!|<span style="font-variant:small-caps;color:Black">'''''Talk'''''</span>]] 20:48, 4 August 2017 (UTC)
+::*{{re|Numerounovedant}} Done.[[User:Krish!|<span style="font-variant:small-caps;color:Red">'''''Krish'''''</span>]] &#124; [[User talk:Krish!|<span style="font-variant:small-caps;color:Black">'''''Talk'''''</span>]] 20:48, 4 August 2017 (UTC)