User talk:Fahmad007: Difference between revisions
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[[User:Yuya.As|Yuya.As]] ([[User talk:Yuya.As|talk]]) 05:10, 29 November 2017 (UTC) |
[[User:Yuya.As|Yuya.As]] ([[User talk:Yuya.As|talk]]) 05:10, 29 November 2017 (UTC) |
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==Culture of Afghanistan== |
===Culture of Afghanistan=== |
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Line 127: Remove bullets in the section “traditional” because both paragraphs are about the holiday called Nowruz. |
Line 127: Remove bullets in the section “traditional” because both paragraphs are about the holiday called Nowruz. |
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Revision as of 05:10, 29 November 2017
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Welcome!
Hello, Fahmad007, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 15:37, 27 September 2017 (UTC)
Review from Yuya
Mexico–United States border
Line 8: The paragraph “There are twenty-three … sovereignty of both countries” should not be in the lead section. You may create other sections such as population and economy. You can also give recent statistics that show the increase in population along the border.
Line 102: What is “another treaty in 1884”? Specify it if possible.
"… due mostly to close ties to the United States, (delete comma) and the Mexican government's support"
Line 154: The section “Newly Proposed Wall Along the U.S. Mexico Border” should go under the section “In context of Trump administration.”
Line 210: The section “Impacts of Border Wall on Wildlife” should be under the section “environment.”
“$2.2 billion was allocated to building (delete "ing") this wall”
The paragraph starting with “In 2006, during the presidency…” has no verification.
Make the paragraph starting with “According to a delegation of Arizona park …” shorter. I think the main idea is that a border wall will affect wildlife because it restricts the movement of animals.
Yuya.As (talk) 05:10, 29 November 2017 (UTC)
Culture of Afghanistan
Line 127: Remove bullets in the section “traditional” because both paragraphs are about the holiday called Nowruz.
Add space between “weather good.” and “On the day of Nowruz.”
Place a period between “before Nowruz to prepare Samanak” and “They pour the ingredients.”
"… the dessert then (add "is") served on the day of Nowruz."