Talk:Jack Hobbs (footballer)/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Kosack (talk · contribs) 21:01, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

I'll take this one, will post review shortly. Kosack (talk) 21:01, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

Lead

• Scunthorpe United is a redirect, pipe to club page.

 Done

• "and to get him more first team opportunities", language used is a bit informal I feel, perhaps "gain first team experience"?

 Done

• Nottingham Forest linked twice in the opening two paragraphs, remove the second link per WP:OVERLINK.

 Done

• "has made three appearances for England U19", drop the has, he's not gonna play for them again.

 Done

Lincoln City

• Matthew Bloomer redirects to Matt Bloomer.
• Ref 4 states that he took the youngest FL player record from Shane Nicholson. I think this would be worth including.

Liverpool

• Refs 5 and 6 are the same link.

 Done

• Hughie McAuley is a redirect, pipe link to correct page.

 Done

• Football League Cup and Cardiff City links are both redirects, pipe to the correct pages.

 Done

• Reading linked twice, remove second link.

 Done

• Bolton > Bolton Wanderers.

 Done

• "He made his first start for the team a week later", specify that this was a league match as he's mentioned as having made his full debut at the start of the paragraph.

 Done

• Scunthorpe > Scunthorpe United.

 Done

• "Manager Nigel Adkins said that Hobbs is a composed player", a little untidy, perhaps "Manager Nigel Adkins described Hobbs as a composed player"?

 Done

Leicester City

• Championship is linked in this paragraph but is also mentioned in the Liverpool section, move the link to the first mention and drop the link here.

 Done

• More clarification is needed over his club debut and his competitive debut, both the Kettering pre-season game and the MK Dons match are listed as his debut at the moment.

 Done

• Aleksander Tunchev >Aleksandar Tunchev

 Done

• Unlink Bristol Rovers, already linked previously.

 Done

• "penalty shot", I don't think shot is necessary here, penalty shot is more of an American sports term.

 Done

• "manager Nigel Pearson commented that the decision was unfortunate, as he believed the foul was not intentional" > change to "the red card was unfortunate." A foul can be unintentional, the red card was given for a deliberate last man foul which is what Pearson questioned.

 Done

• "besides winning the League One and winning promotion to the Championship", bit of repetition there and they're made to sound like separate achievements. Perhaps "besides achieving promotion to the Championship after winning the League One title"?

 Done

• Young Player of the year > club's Young Player of the Year. Some clarification needed there that it was only the club's award and not the league's. A capital Y is also needed for year.

 Done

• Unlink Premier League, already linked previously.

 Done

• "Playing along with Wayne Brown" > Playing alongside?

 Done

• "Failing to break in the first team " > Failing to break into...

 Done

• "On 23 July", add the year after the date.

 Done

• "victory over Bristol City heading", comma after Bristol City.

 Done

• "heading a Robert Koren cross from the penalty box", this sentence is a bit confusing. If the cross was from the penalty box then it should be "heading in", if the header was from the penalty box then it needs clarifying where in the penalty box it was.

 Done

• "He was substituted by debutant Sonny Bradley", is this relevant to Hobbs?

 Done

• Again, is the final sentence about Dudgeon and Chester being out relevant to Hobbs?

 Done

• Peterborough > Peterborough United.

 Done

• Alex Bruce link needs a comma to avoid being a redirect.

 Done

• "After this match, he started in a match against Huddersfield Town", is this notable?

 Done

• "after not playing eight months" > after not playing in eight months

 Done

• Hull Daily Mail > the Hull Daily Mail.
• Removed this.
• Unlink Premier League at the end of the section.

 Done

Nottingham Forest

• "Hull City was" > Hull City were.

 Done

• Unlink Huddersfield Town, Derby County and James Chester, already linked.

 Done

• "In an interview given by him on 10 March, he said that he was doing well with his rehab, and was hopeful of resuming training from the next week.", is this notable? Seems like basic sports reporting rather than encyclopaedic content.

 Done

• Unlink Huddersfield Town again.

 Done

• Is the final paragraph about being linked with a loan move to Ipswich notable?

 Done

International career

• Football > football.
  • Reconstructed the para.

Career statistics

• Pipe Football League Trophy to EFL Trophy.
  • at that time, it was known as Football League Trophy
• Football League Trophy > the Football League Trophy.
  • "the"is not used in this context (you can check other articles)

References

• Refs 9, 40, 45, 46, 47, 52, 54, 57, 58 and 65 need authors.

 Done

• Where does Ref 13's author come from? I don't see Tony Barrett listed in the link.

 Done

• Most refs use simply BBC but ref 16 also lists BBC Sport. Is there a reason? If not, keep to one style to maintain consistency.

 Done

• Is Winner Sports in ref 34 a reliable source?
  • Reliability of a source depends on context, the claim made here is not contentious. Also the website is not a self publishing website.
• All Forest website links use Nottingham Forest as the publisher but ref 57 includes F.C. Keep to one style to maintain consistency.

 Done

• Ref 10 is a dead link.

 Done

• Ref 29 is a dead link.

 Done

• Ref 41 is a dead link.
  • Removed
• Ref 66 is a dead link.
  • Paragrapraph reconstructed.

Categories

• The page is included in the "People educated at Spalding Grammar School" category but this is not mentioned, and therefore not referenced, in the article.
  • Information added and referwnced.

That's my initial review, placed on hold for seven days. Kosack (talk) 21:29, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

Comments

I have more or less addressed all the issued except the ones on references and categories. I will resume my work tomorrow. RRD (talk) 16:41, 9 March 2018 (UTC)

@Kosack: All the issues have been addressed. RRD (talk) 08:48, 12 March 2018 (UTC)