Talk:Albert P. Halfhill: Difference between revisions

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Albert P. Halfhill has been listed as one of the Agriculture, food and drink good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: October 7, 2020. (Reviewed version).

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A fact from Albert P. Halfhill appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 7 June 2017 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:

Did you know... that Albert P. Halfhill is considered the father of the tuna packing industry and was the first to use the slogan "chicken of the sea" as a sales gimmick?

A record of the entry may be seen at Wikipedia:Recent additions/2017/June. The nomination discussion and review may be seen at Template:Did you know nominations/Albert P. Halfhill.

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Albert P. Halfhill/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 14:45, 6 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Taking this review for the GAN October 2020 Backlog Drive. MWright96 (talk) 14:45, 6 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Lead

Mention Halfhill was American in the first sentence of the lead

Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 21:36, 6 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Early life

"and Lydia Halfhill (née Kingman)." - The Template:nee is better off being employed on the text highlighted in bold

Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:55, 7 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"Halfhill had two brothers. He was educated in the public schools of Mercer and St. Mary's, Ohio." - consider merging these two sentences together

Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 09:55, 7 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Career

"He was a partner with August Decker for a few years in a dry goods business in St. Mary's." - how many years exactly?

Done No sources say.

"He then moved to Van Wert, Ohio. There, in 1875, he purchased a grocery store that he operated with Lester Paterson." - considering merging these two sentences together

Done

"like olive or cottonseed oil." - such as

Done

"Albacore was unattractive and called the "hog of the sea"[1]" - a comma is missing between "sea" and the citation

Done

"called the "hog of the sea" - called by whom?

Done

"with a texture like chicken.[14][2][15]" - refs in numerical order please

Done

" he sold 250 cases (packaged in three-quarter pound cans) of cooked" - cases packaged in 3⁄4 pound cans of cooked

Done

"to a grocery store owner in Los Angeles named H. Jevne.[19] Jevne's employees and customers" - try not to start the beginning of the following sentence like this

Done

"Halfhill used the tagline "chicken of the sea" to promote sales,[20][14][21]" - refs in numerical order please

Done

"The product did not sell well at first," - for what reason?

Done

"It became a successful seller in New York before doing so in California." - it was in California.

Done

"for gathering tuna 200 miles out" - the convert template will need to be used on the text in bold

Done

Later life

"Halfhill is considered the father of the tuna-packing industry." - considered by whom?

Done

"Captain Halfhill (an honorary title bestowed on him by his competitors) retired in 1922." - the text in bold doesn't need to be in parentheses

Done

"His sons Charles and Harry took over the operations" - business

Done

"which then sold about 200,000 cases of tuna," - subsequently

Done

"Halfhill died at the age of 76 on May 7, 1924." - where did he die and what from?

Done

Citations

All mentions of newspapers.com should begin with a capital letter

Done

The name of reference 4's work should be fully wikilinked

Done

Reference 18's page number is B3 not 11

Done

Reference 20 contains the error "Smith 2012, pp. 277ndash;28." which needs to be fixed

Done

Reference 22 is missing the page number

Done

Reference 23 is missing the access date

Done

Will put the review on hold to allow the nominator to address or query the points raised above. MWright96 (talk) 17:05, 6 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Working --Doug Coldwell (talk) 17:12, 6 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@MWright96: All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:48, 7 October 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Doug Coldwell: Now promoting to GA class. MWright96 (talk)

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-{{GA nominee|14:47, 22 September 2020 (UTC)|nominator=[[User:Doug Coldwell|Doug Coldwell]] ([[User talk:Doug Coldwell|talk]])|page=1|subtopic=Agriculture, food and drink|status=onhold|note=}}
+{{GA|18:57, 07 October 2020 (UTC)|page=1|topic=Agriculture, food and drink|oldid=982321104}}
-{{WikiProject Biography|class=C|importance=mid| living=no|listas=Halfhill, Albert P.}}
+{{WikiProject Biography|class=GA|importance=mid| living=no|listas=Halfhill, Albert P.}}
-{{WikiProject United States|OH=yes|class=C|importance=mid}}
+{{WikiProject United States|OH=yes|class=GA|importance=mid}}
-{{WikiProject Food and Drink|class=C|importance=mid}}
+{{WikiProject Food and Drink|class=GA|importance=mid}}
 {{Did you know nominations/Albert P. Halfhill}}
 {{DYK talk|7 June|2017|entry= ... that '''[[Albert P. Halfhill]]''' is considered the father of the [[Tuna#Canned|tuna]] packing industry and was the first to use the slogan "chicken of the sea" as a sales gimmick?|nompage=Template:Did you know nominations/Albert P. Halfhill}}