Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/Benjamin Franklin Tilley
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This is an old revision of this page, as edited by 204.218.240.42 (talk) at 09:45, 28 September 2007 (→Benjamin Franklin Tilley). The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this revision, which may differ significantly from the current revision.
- The following discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this page.
this web site sucks I hate it:*"and he was forced to leave to pick up additional coal and supplies at Auckland, New Zealand" how was he forced? How about something along the lines of "and conditions/need for supplies forced him to leave...."
- This is as far as I got, but I still can't support this article as an A quality article. Too many extra words that aren't needed. IMHO it needs to be cleaned up. Even if the changes I pointed out above are made, I don't think this article is A class. I made several other changes in the text myself... see them to see what I mean by unneccessary words.Balloonman 05:04, 24 April 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- To answer you on a couple of points. Tilley oversaw construction while in command of the USS Abarenda, which would eventually (it was intended) also be the station ship. He commanded both posts. (As did Sebree, his successor, until the Navy decided that Commandant was a full time job.) Second, he was in charge of the consulate defenses in Santiago.
- I appreciate your points. What I am considering is expanding the section on Chile a bit, to better describe Tilley's role there. You also don't seem to like the background I'm trying to paint for Samoa because it is a complicated situation and I'm just trying to summarize. (There's a *lot* going on from Pierce to Tilley, including an American civilian setting himself up as effective ruler at one point. All things better put in an American Samoa history article than in Tilley's, but without some summary it hardly seems to make sense that he goes from building a naval station to "surprise! we've taken over your land and I'm now governor". Maybe I can restructure that information to flow better. JRP 10:11, 24 April 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- This is as far as I got, but I still can't support this article as an A quality article. Too many extra words that aren't needed. IMHO it needs to be cleaned up. Even if the changes I pointed out above are made, I don't think this article is A class. I made several other changes in the text myself... see them to see what I mean by unneccessary words.Balloonman 05:04, 24 April 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- Support Carom 18:09, 23 April 2007 (UTC)[reply]
- The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this page.