Wikipedia:Requests for feedback
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The previous few days of requests are transcluded below. The pages for the past 20 days are: ()
Most Worshipful Prince Hall Grand Lodge of Georgia
Most Worshipful Prince Hall Grand Lodge of Georgia —Preceding unsigned comment added by Jsnow1 (talk • contribs) 15:00, 29 December 2009 (UTC)
- At the moment the tone is not appropriate. It reads like a research paper or essay, not an encyclopedic article. I would suggest that you read articles about other Lodges and see how they are laid out and formatted. It also looks like you have extracted a lot of the source material into the article rather than citing it. Please take a look at WP:CITE for help with citing sources. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 18:33, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Sinus Dynamics
User:JillianHerbert/Sinus Dynamics
This page was drafted to provide information about sinus dynamics. It basically contains general information about the program and a description of the equipment. I plan to add more to it, but for now, I'd like to review feedbacks so I know how to proceed further. --JillianHerbert (talk) 22:55, 30 December 2009 (UTC)
- Hi JillianHerbert. The current version is sourced only to press releases and the subject's own website. What is required for both verifiability (WP:V) and notability (WP:N) is independent third-party coverage. Bongomatic 23:08, 30 December 2009 (UTC)
- Request feedback on additional reference/source —Preceding unsigned comment added by JillianHerbert (talk • contribs) 06:10, 11 January 2010 (UTC)
- Please also take a look at WP:SPAM. At the moment the article reads like a doctor handout. The additional references may help with the notability issue, but they need to be cited in-line, please take a look at WP:CITE for assistance. – ukexpat (talk) 16:45, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis
User:Stefanir/Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis
The Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis is a leading research center at the University of Southern California.
Stefanir (talk) 01:03, 11 January 2010 (UTC)
- At the moment the references do not demonstrate why the subject is notable per Wikipedia's general notability guideline. You will need to find reliable sources that provide significant coverage of the subject. – ukexpat (talk) 20:44, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Hello. I am looking for a friendly user who would like to look at my draft that I created. It is about a computer game. The draft page is there as a link. Any inputs, additions, and a little bit of deletion would be welcome.Georgesh1 (talk) 3:39, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
- You will need to find a few more reliable sources to demonstrate the notability of the game per WP:N. Significant coverage is required and the current single source is not sufficient. – ukexpat (talk) 21:35, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Chris Kovarik
I have juts written my first article on Austrialian mountain bike legend Chris Kovarik and would appreciate any opinions/feeds back on the article. You can find it in my userspace here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:TinaEPO/Chris_Kovarik —Preceding unsigned comment added by TinaEPO (talk • contribs) 15:54, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
- The article is at the moment completely unsourced. You will need to add some references to reliable sources to demonstrate the subject's notability per WP:ATHLETE. I have tagged the article accordingly. – ukexpat (talk) 22:03, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
LocalEats
Summary of new article: Description of website/smartphone app/book series LocalEats, published by Where The Locals Eat.
This is my first article, so any advice is very much welcome! Thanks.
Cathrjohnson —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cathrjohnson (talk • contribs) 17:57, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
- It reads like an advertisement--if you could flesh it out with some additional references that would be helpful. But you do have I think enough decent references for notability. Nuujinn (talk) 12:39, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Bert Morgan
Bert Morgan Bert MorganGrandcraft (talk) 21:29, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
George T. Heery
This is the first full article I've written and wanted to open this up for review. The subject is George_T._Heery, a famous American architect who is most notable for his contributions to the foundation of the Construction Program Management industry. Regarding notability, Heery's first firm Heery International, is an internationally known company and Heery is widely known throughout the design and construction industry. I am continuing to do research to improve the article but felt that the article has reached a point where it might be ready for moving to main space soon. The one outstanding item I've marked for citation is the number of construction projects executed using a particular delivery method developed by the subject; I'm awaiting information from the General Services Adminstration, which apparently uses this process quite often. If I cannot locate information which can be cited to support that number I think that the sentence should be removed. Look forward to your help! --Drewprops (talk) 22:09, 14 January 2010 (UTC)
Update: I've gone ahead and moved the article into mainspace and have updated the link here to point to that article. Look forward to help with reviewing the article!--Drewprops (talk) 18:43, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
David Joseph Marcou
I would like some feedback on the article User:Kayak paddler/David Joseph Marcou. I would like to know if it is neutral in tone, specific details as to notability, and formatted properly. Sincerely, --Kayak paddler (talk) 20:03, 17 January 2010 (UTC)
- In terms of style, I'd suggest breaking it up into smaller paragraphs. It's also structure as two lists--you might consider merging the two sections and rewrite it as a narrative in chronological order. Nuujinn (talk) 11:41, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
Thank you very much for your feedback. I will review the guides you suggested Sincerely, --Kayak paddler (talk) 00:29, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
- No problem, pop me a note on my talk page when you're done if you'd like me to take another look. Nuujinn (talk) 15:27, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
GameSystem
--CubeBean (talk) 22:09, 17 January 2010 (UTC)
- As an unreleased product the subject does not meet the notability requirements of WP:PRODUCT. Please also take a look at WP:CRYSTAL and WP:COI as from your talk page you clearly have one. – ukexpat (talk) 01:36, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
HicCalc
Please review my article, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Msmsshyam/HicCalc
Cheers, Shyam.
Msmsshyam (talk) 14:43, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
- Several problems: the article does not indicate how or why the subject is notable per WP:PRODUCT; the references do not support notability and do not appear to be reliable sources as Wikipedia uses that term, see WP:RS; as an unreleased, beta, product, it probably falls foul of WP:CRYSTAL. Once the software has been released and receive some significant coverage in reliable sources, it may be notable. – ukexpat (talk) 15:46, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
Digital Leather
This request is for review on the Digital Leather article. I submitted the article late last week, and I haven't gotten any review on it as of yet. I look forward to your feedback.
--Azlord (talk) 16:34, 18 January 2010 (UTC)Azlord
- The article looks good overall. There are a few bits that are ad-like, but not too many. You did well demonstrating the subject's notability, which is why it hasn't been deleted.
- Citations should include, at least, the author, publisher, and access date of the page. The easiest way to properly format citations is by using citation templates, such as cite web. It may help to read Wikipedia:Referencing for beginners.
- While you link to great reliable sources at the bottom of the page, the actual references are mainly to Discogs, which contains user submitted information. It would be wise to substitute the Discogs refs with refs to places like Phoenix New Times and Drowned in Sound.
- Speaking of that Phoenix New Times article, it uses the same picture the Wikipedia article uses. Can you edit the photo page and link to the spot where the image has been released into the public domain? Wikipedia takes copyright matters seriously, and the image may otherwise soon be deleted. If you are the copyright holder or represent Digital Leather, consider using Wikipedia:Contact us/Photo submission.
- Thanks for your contributions. If you have any questions related to these suggestions or editing a general, leave me a message by clicking "talk" in my signature and editing the page. Liqudluck✽talk 22:03, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
Chronicles of the Nerds
User:Emb92/Chronicles of the Nerds is an article that I am writing for a web group that creates various forms of web entertainment (like weekly podcasts). I just want to make sure that it will not get deleted for not fitting to the correct criteria. Thanks for your help. Emb92 (talk) 17:16, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
- In case you haven't seen it, the notability criteria for web content is located at Wikipedia:Notability (web). As it is, your article does not meet this criteria and would be quickly deleted. To demonstrate a subject's notability, an article should link to (at least) 2-3 sources independent of the subject and its creators that give the subject a more than a trivial mention. These sources may be from newspapers (excluding school newspapers) or their websites, from published books, or other reliable sources. If the web content has received an significant award or honor, a link to a site stating it has won will also demonstrate notability.
- Otherwise, the article is nicely formatted (nice inline citations) but reads like an ad instead of an encyclopedia entry. Change the opening sentence to a definition of the subject (Ex. CotN is a comedy video website). Words/phrases like "meticulous", "amazing", and "foremost goal is to receive and listen avidly" are inappropriate unless a reliable source agrees. The "foremost goal is to receive and listen avidly" sounds like it should be attributed as a quote from someone.
- Good luck! If you have questions about these suggestions or editing in general, click the "talk" in my signature and leave me a message. Liqudluck✽talk 20:57, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
The Center for Higher Education Policy Analysis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Stefanir/Center_for_Higher_Education_Policy_Analysis
I have gotten no feedback on this article. Does that mean it is ready to go? Please review. Thanks.
Stefanir (talk) 19:27, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
- "Does that mean it is ready to go?" Unfortunately, not necessarily. We have a large backlog of requests, and a shortage of editors dealing with them, and sometimes it takes a long time for a request to be dealt with. I have had a quick look at your draft article.
- The general style and character of the article is fine: far better than is the case with many new articles, but some work needs to be done, particularly on the references.
- You have clearly put some effort into providing references, but unfortunately some of them do not serve the purpose for which references are intended. For example, http://www.acenet.edu/resources/policy-research/index.cfm just links to an index and search page, which does not contain any information about CHEPA. It may well be that, by searching from there, it is possible to find confirmation of what you say in your draft, but a reference should take us directly to the relevant information, not just point us to somewhere we can search from. Then we have a link to a Google books page about a book which is mentioned in your draft. However, that Google page does not confirm the statement to which the reference is attached, namely "The Center's blog entitled 21st Century Scholar regularly features the work of guest scholars from around the country, including Yvonna Lincoln, co-author of Naturalistic Inquiry". The point of a reference is to show a source which confirms the statement made in the article, not just to give a link to something which is mentioned in that statement. Likewise the statement "The center is run by Dr. William G. Tierney, University Professor and Wilbur-Kieffer Professor of Higher Education at the Rossier School of Education" is followed by a reference to a page which mentions Tierney but does not tell us that the center is run by him, which is what the sentence says to which this is supposed to be a reference. Likewise the statement that Tierney "is the author of more than 16 books on higher education and the editor of more than 40 books, monographs and journals" is followed by a reference to a page which does not mention the number of his publications. So it goes on. Also, some of the information given is of marginal relevance: for example, the fact that Tierney runs the center is clearly of direct relevance to the article, but how many publications he has is of direct relevance to him, but only indirect relevance to an article on the center. Of course there is always an element of judgement as to how direct the connection has to be, but I do not think this information is relevant enough to justify inclusion, and the same applies to some other statements.
- References should establish two things: (1) there is substantial independent coverage of the topic, to show that the topic is notable enough to have an article about it, and (2) the statements in the article can be verified from reliable sources. The requirements for these two purposes are a little different. The second purpose can often be achieved by references from sources from the subject of the article, or sources related to it (in this case sources from CHEPA, USC, etc). However, for establishing notability independent sources are essential, and at present these are lacking.
- I hope these remarks have been helpful. JamesBWatson (talk) 15:03, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
The Challenge Series
The Challenge Series- a seven part book about the sustainable construction of the 2010 Olympic Village in Vancouver, Canada. An overview of the book, including content, contributors and sponsors. The Challenge Series Ashlee Jollymore, January 18 2010 Lunette 18 (talk) 20:38, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
- The main issue here is the "sponsorship" section, which an entire section of external links. Please see WP:EL and WP:NOTLINK for more details. -Reconsider! 05:08, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
SME Dynamic Systems LTD
User:Const mc/SME Dynamic Systems LTD
Hello, this is my first article, I've tried to add information about a ukrainian game development company. Please give some feedback on it. Am I moving in the right direction?
Const mc (talk) 22:14, 18 January 2010 (UTC)
- Not a bad start, you are definitely heading in the right direction. Next step would be to expand the article and find some more references. -Reconsider! 09:03, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
- Please take a look at WP:CORP. At the moment I see nothing in the article to indicate that the subject meets Wikipedia's inclusion criteria for companies. You will need some robust references from reliable sources to support notability. – ukexpat (talk) 17:55, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
Nuzhat J. Haneef
Hello Wiki editors,
I would be really appreciate any feedback on my draft article.
User:Wixnstuff/Nuzhat J. Haneef
Oh! And in the first paragraph of my draft I wrote:
Proper title noted as: Recognizing the Messiah. Assessing Mirza Ghulam Ahmad of Qaadiyaan: His Claims, His Views, His Character, and His Movement (Published September 2004).
How do I link the title of the book to reference link below that I have in the External Links section? Or do I even need to do that?
Thanks for help. Keep up the good work!
Wixnstuff (talk) 07:56, 19 January 2010 (UTC)Wixnstuff
- You could use {{cite book}} and fill in the appropriate fields as specified on the template page. Then put that between a ref and a /ref tag, which i see you already know how to do. You could also use that for other books mentioned in the (would-be) article.
- However, there are larger problems than this.
- One is that you appear to be writing an article about yourself. As you will see in our autobiography guideline, this is strongly discouraged. (If I am mistaken here, my apologies.)
- Another is that the article as written is in form a biographical article but seems to be more about the book than about the author. If the main subject is the book, make it an article about the book.
- A third, and larger yet, is that you need some independent reliable sources about the book and the author. You cite some sources (although how independent and reliable they are I can't judge) about Mirza Ghulam Ahmad, who is the subject of Recognizing the Messiah, but none about the book or about Nuzhat J. Haneef, who is supposedly the subject of this article. Perhaps you should create an article about Mirza Ghulam Ahmad? As far as one can tell from this article Recognizing the Messiah could be a self-published book that no one has heard of. If it is, it doesn't belong on Wikipedia. If it isn't, publication details (publisher, ISBN, etc) and citations of independent reviews or discussions of the book would help establish its notability, and published discussion of Nuzhat J. Haneef would help establish her notability, as suggested in our notability guideline for biographies. Addressing the issue of cited sources is far more vital than any formatting issues for this would-be article.
- I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 15:25, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
Qigong Sensory Training
Any suggestions or feedback on my article would be greatly appreciated. It's my first one!
Krisgab (talk) 23:30, 19 January 2010 (UTC)
Here's a direct link for reviewers- User:Krisgab/QST. Liquidluck✽talk 04:01, 20 January 2010 (UTC)
- Technically this is not a bad start. There is a paragraph duplicated in the introductory section (often called "the lede" on Wikipedia) and the "Theory" section. This should be at lest reworded in one place, or not repeated. One issue is that this seems exclusively positive, particularly for what seems a form of Alternative medicine. Have there been no criticism or negative opinions on this method? If there have been, the should be reported in the name of maintaining balance and a neutral point of view. Another possible problem is that most, perhaps all, of the sources seem to be written or co-authored by L. Silva. Has this method been independently discussed by anyone else? How widely accepted is this method? We need to be particularly careful on medical topics to distinguish between mainstream views, fringe views, one-man theories, and minority but widely supported views. Also, the one web site linked and some of the refernces' titles seem to imply that this treatment method is the proprietary method of L. Silva and those associated with him/her, or is pretty much solely advocated by such people. If so, the cited references are mostly not independent, which lowers there reliability for this purpose. If L. Silva and his/her associates are the sole advocates of this method, that should be stated, for example "Qigong Sensory Training is a specific application from the branch of Chinese Medicine devised and promoted by L. Silva that utilizes..." if there are any truly independent sources that discuss this, they should be added. There should be a clearer statement as to how widely accepted this method is. Good work so far. DES (talk) 17:30, 20 January 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you for the feedback. This is very helpful! I'll work on incorporating your suggestions. Krisgab (talk) 18:21, 21 January 2010 (UTC)
I've made the edits suggested by Liquidluck. If Liquidluck or anyone else could look at it one more time, I'd greatly appreciate it!Krisgab (talk) 20:22, 22 January 2010 (UTC)
- It still seems very promotional, or at least one-sided. There is still no mention of any criticism, nor of reactions of the wider medical community, positive or negative. Six of the eight cited sources have "Silva, L." as an author or co-author. One of the remaining two is published by the "Qigong Institute" which doesn't exactly sound independent of the concept. The concluding statement "Treatments based on Chinese medicine are directed to the cause of an illness rather than the symptoms, and, when given for a sufficient length of time, provide lasting change." should probably be qualified with "according to its advocates" or some such, and in any case cited. DES (talk) 19:34, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
- Also, the first paragraph in the "Theory" section is still very similar in wording to the introductory paragraph, which makes it seem repetitious to a reader. DES (talk) 19:34, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
Jed Riffe
How can I post an article about a PBS filmmakers? Can someone check it out and post it?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Zb12st12/JedRiffe
thank you zb12st12 01-20-2010 —Preceding unsigned comment added by Zb12st12 (talk • contribs) 00:29, 21 January 2010 (UTC)
The National Institute for Metalworking Skills
User:Nims22030/new NIMS - — Preceding unsigned comment added by Nims22030 (talk • contribs)
Draft article
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The National Institute for Metalworking Skills (NIMS) was formed in 1995 by the metalworking trade associations to develop and maintain globally competitive American workforce. NIMS sets skills standards for the industry, certifies individual skills against the standards and accredits training programs that meet NIMS quality requirements. NIMS operates under rigorous and highly disciplined processes as the only developer of American National Standards for the nation’s metalworking industry accredited by the American National Standards Institute (ANSI). NIMS Stakeholders NIMS has a stakeholder base of over 6,000 metalworking companies. The major trade associations in the industry- the Association for Manufacturing Technology, the American Machine Tool Distributors' Association, the National Tooling & Machining Association, the Precision Machine Products Association, the Precision Metalforming Association, and the Tooling and Manufacturing Association have invested over $7.5 million in private funds for the development of the NIMS standards and its credentials. The associations also contribute annually to sustain NIMS operations and are committed to the upgrading and maintenance of the standards. NIMS Program Accreditation NIMS accredits training programs that meet its quality requirements. The NIMS accreditation requirements include an on-site audit and evaluation by a NIMS industry team that reviews and conducts on-site inspections of all aspects of the training programs, including administrative support, curriculum, plant, equipment and tooling, student and trainee progress, industry involvement, instructor qualifications and safety. Officials governing NIMS accredited programs report annually on progress and are subject to re-accreditation on a five year cycle. As of December 31, 2006 there were 162 NIMS accredited programs in operation. An additional 86 institutions and firms were in the process of completing the accreditation process. There are 105 certified NIMS Team Leaders from private industry who lead the on-site audits. NIMS Competency-based Apprenticeship System NIMS has launched a new Competency-based Apprenticeship System for the nation’s metalworking industry. The NIMS system represents a dramatic departure from the time based system and integrates the NIMS national standards and skill certifications in defining and measuring required competencies. Developed in partnership with the United States Department of Labor, the new system is the result of two years of work. Over 300 companies participated in the deliberations and design. The new National Guideline Standards for NIMS Competency-based Apprenticeship have been approved by the Department of Labor. NIMS has trained Department of Labor apprenticeship staff at the national and state level in the new system. Governance NIMS is governed by a 24 person Board of Directors, the majority of whom are metalworking company executives. The Board also has representatives from training institutions, education, state government and organized labor. NIMS financial operations are audited and reported annually in accordance with the Office of Management and Budget Circular A-133 and the provisions of the Single Audit Act.
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Edwin James (scientist)
Edwin James was the first white person to climb Colorado's Pikes Peak; he is referenced repeatedly in that article, and in the article about the Ojibwe language. Thank you for your feedback.
Aiken1986 (talk) 02:43, 22 January 2010 (UTC)
- Nice work. I removed the tag and made a few minor formatting changes. – ukexpat (talk) 04:31, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
Divorce Fairs
I would like to develop the draft article on Divorce Fairs which are now occurring throughout the world and yet have no information I could find on Wikipedia. I have posted a short history of divorce fairs and information about the first one in Austria (first in the world) and first one in the UK in 2009. I am interested in bringing together more information on this international phenomenon because I myself (as a single mum who went through breakup) created the first ever divorce fair in the UK.
Comments and contributions welcomed.
Suzymiller (talk) 23:01, 22 January 2010 (UTC)
- It is really hard to review this article since there are not inline citations for verification. I honestly expect it to meet the notability guidelines. It really is just inappropriate without the references. One thing that jumped out besides the references:
- You should trim out the end bits regarding the history of divorce. The scope of the article should be the conventions and not divorce in general
- Take the citations used (plus more that are independent of the subject) and write a piece about the organizers and why the media (easiest) has said the fairs are noteworthy. Don't go as far as forcing notability. Just find some independent coverage (a write up in a newspaper for example) and cater the article to general info (not marketing). Feel free to shoot me a message or mention it here if you need a hand on the technical side of using inline citations and expressing notability in a neutral manner. Cptnono (talk) 12:12, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
Trimatrix data warehousing
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sysgentvl/new_article_name_here
This is my first article. Can you please review and tell me how to make this article "encyclopaedic" ? Thanks in anticipation. --Sysgentvl (talk) 08:35, 24 January 2010 (UTC)
- This appears to be a bout a specific software product. It needs more context in the intro paragraph, but most of all it needs references from independent third-party reliable sources that show why this particular software is Notable.
- Statements like "Top management can take policy decisions based on Trimatrix reports." sound like advertising.
- Relevant terms and firm names should be wikilinked, for example "Cognos, Business Objects, SAS (Statistical Analysis System) and such other Business Intelligence (BI) tools" Not also that this sentence confuses tools and the companies that make them.
- Text like "Using the existing systems, the top and middle management teams across the organizations in an enterprise are still not able to review an individual unit’s performance. Managers always want reports to be verified by junior. The reports are static and the supervisor cannot add comments or questions. The junior cannot attach in reply documents or presentations in a report for review. Any new report or analysis or new module takes months for the IT team to get ready." is original research unless these vies can be attributed to a named source in a citation to a published comment.
- the section "more features added" particularly reads like an advertisement.
- The "Triangulation" section does not explain how the three figures are supposed to confirm each other or are checked against each other.
- Also if you work for or with the makers of this product, please read our conflict of interest page. DES (talk) 03:51, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
- Disclosure: I am an employee of Cognos, and apparently the product described here competes with some of the products made by Cognos. DES (talk) 03:36, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
Bumper pool
I have begun to do some copy edits and would like some feedback on the article Bumper_pool. Is this article appropriate in tone and style? Any suggestions for how to improve the quality of the prose would be appreciated,
Nuujinn (talk) 19:46, 24 January 2010 (UTC)
- Looks pretty good to me. I have added some references and used those and the reference sources already present to cite may statemetns previously uncited. A section on the history of the game would not be amiss, IMO. DES (talk) 22:44, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the help. I agree about the history, I'll see what I can find, but I'm really just trying to help out with the copy editing
- Thanks for the help. I agree about the history, I'll see what I can find, but I'm really just trying to help out with the copy editing
Nuujinn (talk) 23:18, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
- There is a history page at the cited vendor site, but much of it is covered by the history sections in the articels on the class of games. DES (talk) 23:29, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
Please ignore - this title seems to be used before and deleted. Will repost under a new page name. —Preceding unsigned comment added by MediaVulture (talk • contribs) 21:50, 24 January 2010 (UTC)
Please review the following wiki page written about the feature film the Beatnicks —Preceding unsigned comment added by MediaVulture (talk • contribs) 21:39, 24 January 2010 (UTC)
- You mean User:MediaVulture/The Beatnicks? Please take a look at our guidelines for the notability of films at WP:NFILMS. As currently drafted it does not appear that the film is notable and therefore does not meet Wikipedia's principal inclusion criterion. – ukexpat (talk) 20:29, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
Sigi Schmid
Hi request for feedback watchers. I sometimes poke around here and noticed that it is usually new articles that get listed. I was considering bypassing GA and going feedback->PR->FA as is mentioned at Wikipedia:Peer review. A handful of editors are going for featured topic with Seattle Sounders FC, and I wanted to get some fresh eyes on an article. Knowing me, there should be plenty of grammatical screw ups. General layout, wikifying, and other fun stuff might also be a concern. Anyone feel like offering some feedback to make Sigi Schmid a quality article? Thanks!Cptnono (talk) 12:05, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
Natalie Wynne Pace
Natalie Wynne Pace
User:HeatherSophia/NatalieWynnePace
````HeatherSophia, 20100125 —Preceding unsigned comment added by HeatherSophia (talk • contribs) 15:28, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
- This reads as rather promotional, a more objective tone would be helpful. Are there no negative facts or criticism that are well sourced? The Manual of Style recommends against curly or angled quotes, i have changed them to straight quotes. That "Every cent you own and every moment you spend is always an investment." is her favorite quote should be cited, and is it her statement originally or a quote from someone else that she favors? "Dr. Gary Becker (Nobel Prize winning economist and University Professor, Department of Economics and Sociology Professor at the Graduate School of Business, The University of Chicago)" is excessive qualification in a parenthesis, i edited to link to Gary Becker, remove the Dr (which wikipedia does not use as an academic title in general), and limit the text to mentioning the Nobel prize, which is quite sufficient to establish his emenince, readres interested in more detail can follow the link. WP:MOSTM says "Do not use the ™ and ® symbols, or similar, in either article text or citations, unless unavoidably necessary for context". I have removed a tm symbol. Who says she is "a trusted source of financial news."? cite needed. I also added several wiki-links, more are probably needed. DES (talk) 02:02, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
User:Gewald/iKnowWare could use some feedback
User:Gewald/iKnowWare Is this close to being ready to go public? What should I add if not? This is my first contribution.
Gewald (talk) 16:54, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
- In view of its Forbes thing, the company is probably notable as required by WP:CORP. However, the tone of the article is too promotional and sounds like it was lifted straight out of the company's marketing literature. It will need to be toned down before it is moved to the mainspace. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 18:10, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
This page provides information about the software company developer express. There are references, citations, internal, and external links. I'd appreciate a sanity check before publishing it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Pkimmel/DevExpress#References
Pkimmel (talk) 18:12, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
Paul Kimmel
- There is a referencing problem at the moment. All of your references are to either the company's own web site, to press releases, or to blog/forum posts. To verify an award by SD magazine, you should link to a page from SD that reports the award, or if that is not online, state the issue and date where this was announced. The same for ASP.NET Pro Magazine. References to third-party, independent, reliable sources are vital to establish notability. I suspect that this firm is actually notable, but you haven't yet provided the sources to demonstrate this.
- Also, Wikipedia articles should never be used as references. They can be linked in the body of the article or in a see also section.
- I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 18:24, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
User:Komowkwa/Robert M. Strozier
User:Komowkwa/Robert M. Strozier
This is my first article and it concerns the person for whom the main FSU library is named.
Komowkwa (talk) 01:28, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
- Looks pretty good. I have taken the liberty to format the citations with proper citation templates, and use named references to indicate where a give source supports multiple statements in the article. I also did some minor copyediting.
- There might be more about what Strozier did during his term as president. You might have a look at http://news.google.com/archivesearch?um=1&cf=all&ned=us&hl=en&q=Robert+M.+Strozier (google news archive search)
- The paragraph about the CIA connection is a bit dubious here since there is no statement that Strozier was involved with the CIA aspect while he was a member of the advisory council of the National Student Association, nor that the revelations were connected with him or affected his reputation in any way. What does the CIA involvement with the National Student Association have to do with Strozier? You don't say, nor do your sources.
- Still I think this is ready to be moved to the main article space. Notability seems obvious DES (talk) 09:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
- By the way, there is apparently a different Robert M. Strozier (a son?) who has written severla scholarly books, see http://www.worldcat.org/search?q=au%3A%22Strozier%2C+Robert+M.%22&qt=hot_author
- I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 09:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for spending your time on this. I really appreciate this and will follow up regarding your suggestions.
- I was at FSU from 1964 through the end of 1974. When the CIA stuff came out in 1967, it was a pretty hot topic. I recall that the school planned to drop out of the NSA which they had joined while Strozier was President. However, I looked a little bit for some current references regarding the CIA/NSA stuff and did not find what I was looking for in the newspaper archives. I remember that there were some news reports on the subject and my search did find a reference for one of the statements in another article regarding the CIA. I think I can hold that section out of this article for now and will try to figure out how to "move" this to the main article space.Komowkwa (talk) 02:27, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
- It might well justify an article of its own, but the relevance to Strozier is not established by the cites in the article so far. I see you did the move just fine DES (talk) 14:10, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
- I was at FSU from 1964 through the end of 1974. When the CIA stuff came out in 1967, it was a pretty hot topic. I recall that the school planned to drop out of the NSA which they had joined while Strozier was President. However, I looked a little bit for some current references regarding the CIA/NSA stuff and did not find what I was looking for in the newspaper archives. I remember that there were some news reports on the subject and my search did find a reference for one of the statements in another article regarding the CIA. I think I can hold that section out of this article for now and will try to figure out how to "move" this to the main article space.Komowkwa (talk) 02:27, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
SmartSignal
The article is posted at: User:Jwkerastas/SmartSignal
The name of the article is SmartSignal Corporation.
Jwkerastas (talk) 17:46, 27 January 2010 (UTC)Jwkerastas, January 27, 2010
I apologize if I haven't correctly provided the correct information - this is my first article for Wikipedia!
- A reasonable start. There are several major issues, however:
- Notability. You cite several references but since they are not online (or links are not provided) it is hard to say if these are in-depth coverage or passing mentions. Relevant quotes, if sources are not online can help. Remember that articles should pass the general notability guideline.
- Formatting. Most of the article is now in an outline style. This should all be expanded into prose (or dropped where overly detailed) before the article goes live.
- References. See our citation policy, which supports our verifiability policy. If much of the outline is expanded there will be lots of facts in need of supporting citations from reliable sources. Note that awards should be supported with citations to independent sources, not company pages, documents, or press releases, whenever possible.
- Also, if you work for or with the company, you should read our conflict of interest policy and be very careful if it applies to you and this subject.
- I'm afraid this is a long way from begin ready to go live.
- I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 20:52, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
Thank your for the feedback! I will redouble my efforts to learn how to do this properly. I will a) add links for references, b) transform the outline format into prose, and c) better integrate references. I used to work for SmartSignal, which is how I learned about it's technology, but left in March 2007. Jwkerastas Jwkerastas (talk) 20:50, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
Dear DESiegel|DES,
I've tried to follow your instructions but seem to have goofed up the structuring of my references - can you please help? Jwkerastas 18:49, 28 January 2010 Jwkerastas Jwkerastas (talk) 00:51, 29 January 2010 (UTC)
- Will attempt to assist. DES (talk) 16:21, 29 January 2010 (UTC)
FAT TONE
(FAT TONE User:Originalrecordz/Fat-Tone)
17:48, 27 January 2010 (UTC)BiggKhrisco (talk)
This is just a general request for feedback. I started this page in the fall of 2009 when it became clear that the musical was going to have some life. It's now heading for Broadway and is scheduled to officially open on April 24. Could a few people take a look at the article to offer some suggestions for improvement. I know the plot section is totally unsourced, and I'm working on that. But with a Broadway launch imminent, this article is bound to see a lot more traffic and I want it to be as good as possible before that.
Thanks
Fryede (talk) 19:37, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
- As you said, you need to source the plot section. If you can find a source saying that the musical will follow the plot of the album, the such a source about the plot of the album could suffice. OTher than that, very good article.BillyJack193 (talk) 22:06, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
User:Jhuber08/TeamDynamixHE
--Jhuber08 (talk) 20:31, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
Curotek
This is a new article relating to one of the providers of assisted living technologies.
Alfresearch (talk) 22:41, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
The Balance
Hi, just finished writing an article on a well-known Canadian rock band
The name of the article is called The Balance
User:The Balance Music/The Balance
Thanks for your time, and looking forward hearing from you!!
The Balance Music (talk)User:The Balance Music 10:50 (EST) Jan 27/2010
- It's not immediately clear to me that the band meets the notability requirements set out at WP:BAND, or that either of the albums meets the requirements for albums set out at WP:NALBUM. So before any of these are moved you will need to cite significant coverage in reliable sources demonstrating their notability. – ukexpat (talk) 17:47, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
2009 flu pandemic in Taiwan
2009 flu pandemic in Taiwan 2009 flu pandemic in TaiwanAngelaseh (talk) 08:16, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
Martino Tirimo
User:Jowilson55/Martino Tirimo
This is my first Wikipedia article so I just want to check I'm along the right lines. There are no references because I've only used Tirimo's website for information (with permission), which is posted in the External links section anyway.
Many thanks
Joanna
Jowilson55 (talk) 10:28, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
- The subject's own website is often not a reliable source. You need better sources for most of his claims and assertions. See other tags on the article now. --Orange Mike | Talk 17:36, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
Navy Hospital Charleston History
Navy Hospital Charleston History User:Garyrg398/Navy_Hospital_Charleston_History Garyrg398 (talk) 18:54, 28 January 2010 (UTC)
FGH Security is a new Wikilink I have posted - any feedback wourld be appreciated on it.
Prosec (talk) 12:27, 29 January 2010 (UTC) Prosec 29/01/10
- Couple of major problems: first, the draft does not indicate how or why the company is notable per the guidelines set out at WP:CORP; second, it is too promotional in tone - it reads like a company marketing piece. So at this stage I would not recommend moving it to the mainspace as it would probably be speedily deleted. – ukexpat (talk) 16:20, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
Cambridge Innovation Center (CIC)
User:CambridgeQueen/Sandbox Cambridge Innovation Center
CambridgeQueen (talk) 17:46, 29 January 2010 (UTC)
First_Unitarian_Church_of_Memphis
Please review my Wikipedia article; this is the first one I have ever created. Thank you very much.
First Unitarian Church of Memphis
User:RoseyCat/First Unitarian Church of Memphis
RoseyCat (talk) 22:23, 29 January 2010 (UTC)16:21, 29 January 2010 (CST)
- I'm new at this, but I think if you drop the "we" and put it all in third person, and get references from outside of wikipedia, you're off to a good start. Where you have references to wikipedia, use the internal link format using brackets, but you need some verifiable sources from newspapers, books, and the like. Nice start! Nuujinn (talk) 02:25, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
I believe that I made the recommended changes. However, I am uncertain about the formatting of my reference and hope that it is correct.RoseyCat (talk) 00:27, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- Good improvements! I took the liberty of working on the references in the first couple of paragraphs, and editing the external links. For internal references to wikipedia, just put the article name in double brackets, and if that doesn't work in the flow of the paragraph, use a bar to separate the article name and the text you'd like to appear, eg." Cats are popular pets." For links to outside sources, see WP:cite, but I put in an example for you. Hope that helps, Nuujinn (talk) 12:07, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
Blufeld
Helo everyone, I have just completed an article on an artist named Blufeld (David Hearn) and would appreciate your judgement and feedback on its content and layout. Thank you for your time!
Best Regards, Diana Bauer —Preceding unsigned comment added by Illumini08 (talk • contribs) 23:11, 29 January 2010 (UTC)
User:Russell.Shackleton/Sandbox
User:Russell.Shackleton/Sandbox
I would appreciate comments on my article which is Little Smalltalk 3.04 DOS. I would like to link to it from the Little_Smalltalk topic eventually. kta0410 (talk) 08:01, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
- Couple of major problems: first, the draft does not indicate how or why the subject matter is notable as described in WP:N and further in WP:PRODUCT - it will need significant coverage in reliable sources to show notability; second; half of the draft looks like a how-to, and that is not suitable for Wikipedia per WP:HOWTO. – ukexpat (talk) 16:14, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
Marijan Dundek
Marijan Dundek (This is appearing in red so I must be doing something wrong in this link)
Big apologies for posting this twice - I accidentally merged it with someone else's query above mine (User: Mysdaao) which was checked 'Resolved', so I was afraid if I didn't post it again it wouldn't be seen as the editors would think it was all part of that other query. Very sorry for the confusion! My new comments are below, starting with 'Thank you for your prompt feedback'.
Hello,
I have created a new entry which is currently in draft form at
I've tried to find the answers to the following questions but I'm afraid I got lost in the many different help sections. My main questions are:
How do I upload the two images? (public domain)
How do I add the subject category?
There are probably some other issues that need fixing, like the format of the links in References and External Links.
I think that once these issues are resolved, the article is ready for going live.
Thank you for your help. I look forward to hearing from you.
Meechpod (talk) 12:25, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
- You add categories by typing eg. [[Category:1950 births]] at the bottom of the page for each category that you want the article to appear in. It's best not to do this until the article is "live".
- For help formating your references, see Wikipedia:Citing sources. You especially need to make sure that you reference his "claims to fame" so to speak - say who thinks he's an authority, where does it say his book is the top-selling one, the most popular etc.
- By the way, to link to an article or page here, like you have done above, you just need to enclose the name in two square brackets, eg. [[User:Meechpod/new article name here]] gives User:Meechpod/new article name here.
- Hope this helps, --BelovedFreak 13:07, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
- (after edit conflict) I'll leave the upload question to somebody more familiar with that than I am; but are you sure the pictures are public domain? You'll need to demonstrate that. (If you're planning to use the photo of the Lesotho Promise from the Jewellery Outlook article, that appears to belong to Graff Diamonds).
- You add an article to a category by inserting [[Category:<category name>]] anywhere in it - usually at the bottom.
- There are indeed issues which need fixing, so that the article is not ready for going live. The minor point is that the language is not encyclopaedic: please read WP:PEACOCK. The more serious one is that there are no independent, substantial references to reliable sources. While the article does implicitly assert the subject's notability as the author of a significant book, you need to establish his notability, and meet the stringent requirements of WP:BLP or the article will certainly be nominated for deletion as non-notable. --ColinFine (talk) 13:09, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
Thank you for your prompt feedback. I have removed 'peacock' terms such as 'top-selling' and 'popular' ('top-selling' was included on the basis of the book having the top spot in the Amazon ranking of books of this subject matter -- is that allowed to be mentioned?).
I read the section WP:BLP and it seems that the subject meets these criteria, as his book has been judged notable in its field by the organizations mentioned and peer reviews (such as the two cited in references). I'm not clear as to why these two sources do not qualify as independent, reliable references, as they come from independent published sources.
I don't believe I have other source material I can add, so please tell me if you feel the article does not merit inclusion on the basis of the references given so far and I will delete it. Thank you for your help. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Meechpod (talk • contribs) 18:38, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
Meechpod (talk) 19:24, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
Memorial Laws: Laws Dedicated to the Memory of a Victim
Draft text added by Fleibman (talk • contribs) 20:25, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
Moved to user subpage: User:Fleibman/Memorial Laws. – ukexpat (talk) 20:29, 30 January 2010 (UTC)
Lindsay Vickery
Requesting review of the entry on the Australian composer Lindsay Vickery 124.182.21.77 (talk) 08:18, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
Vokab Kompany
Vokab Kompany User:Steviebeatbox/Vokab Kompany
Steviebeatbox (talk) 08:41, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
I can't figure out how to construct the box at the upper right corner of the page with band/musician info. I tried copying another bands from the sandbox, then replacing the pertinent information, but no luck. Would appreciate feedback. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Steviebeatbox (talk • contribs) 16:30, 31 January 2010 (UTC) Steviebeatbox (talk) 06:40, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- Please take a look at Wikipedia's inclusion criteria for bands set out at WP:BAND - the band does not appear to be notable per this guideline. – ukexpat (talk) 15:30, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
The Leeds Look
I would be grateful for feedback on this article.
I was surprised that the "Leeds Look" was not mentioned in the existing Architecture of Leeds article but if my stuff was merged in to this there would be a danger of the article becoming too long especially as I have some other potential bits and pieces about Leeds architectural history that could be added. So should my article remain separate with a link from the Architecture of Leeds article? EricPolymath (talk) 14:41, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- Looking good! – ukexpat (talk) 19:31, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
Dr. Michael C. Ain
User:Jaynamller/new article name here gives general information about the only surgeon in America who is a dwarf. (Jaynamller (talk) 16:09, 31 January 2010 (UTC)Jayna Miller, January 31, 2010) I would appreciate editorial comments on the article. Thank you so much!
- I have reviewed the draft and as you will see I have made some formatting and other layout edits, and added some wikilinks. I have also added some inline tags identifying some issues, but generally you will need to find some sources that support the statements made and further demonstrate his notability. Also, I see you have some references in {{ }} - take a look at WP:FOOTNOTES and WP:CITE for help with formatting references or leave a note on my talk page if you need help figuring it out. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 19:27, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
Russian battleship Sevastopol (1895)
Just want to see what needs to be done to improve this before CSD can be survived. Have already added infobox based on User:Sturmvogel 66's comment. User:Buggie111/ Russian battleship Sevastopol (1895) Buggie111 (talk) 16:36, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
Oh, it should be 1892, not 95 Buggie111 (talk) 00:19, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
Sherif Sonbol
Sherif Sonbol (Egyptian photographer). Someone else already did a small article in German, so I've been working in the English version and would appreciate someone's opinion to see if I can put this one on up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Welle_1/Sherif_Sonbol
Thanks, --Welle 1 (talk) 20:51, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- The career section is problematic, that kind of details is not needed nor suitable for Wikipedia. You should avoid words like Unfortunately, and sentences like "he managed to shake the foundations of Egyptian interior photography". See WP:Peacock. Sole Soul (talk) 22:43, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks will work on it. Will try to re-locate and add some of the Arabic original references (like the interior photography comment). —Preceding unsigned comment added by Welle 1 (talk • contribs) 20:21, 5 February 2010 (UTC)
Realtek Media Player
Hi,
The Realtek Media Player page has been deleted, I created this : User:Bikepunk2/Realtek_Media_Player Since this software exist and is actually installed on a lot of computers, people might want to know what AvRack is about (if the article is ok, I'll make a redirect from AvRack) and expect to find an answer on wikipedia. I just would like to know if it's ok, then I publish it or not. Thanks in advance for your time. Bikepunk2 (talk) 21:26, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- See WP:ITEXISTS section in the essay about the arguments you should avoid in deletion discussions. The article does not cite any independent reliable source. Sole Soul (talk) 22:26, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
Central Church of Christ (Paducah,KY)
Just need someone to look at my article. It's not long, but it's short sweet and to the point. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Grandrivers,ky (talk • contribs) 22:17, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
- It is short and to the point. I think you might consider casting the sentence beginning with "You" to a more neutral phrasing. It would also be nice if you could include some references about the church, from say local newspapers, and perhaps some links to other articles in wikipedia for context (such as any general articles on the Church of Christ). Post a note on my talk pages if you'd like any additional help. Nuujinn (talk) 23:55, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
Ramon Naval Guico
Ramon Naval Guico Ramon Naval Guico --121.1.18.242 (talk) 05:19, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- I have reviewed, removed the tag, cleaned up the text a little and added some categories. I also added project templates to the talk page. – ukexpat (talk) 16:06, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
please make my article exist. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Demonicld (talk • contribs) 13:40, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- Sorry but this individual does not meet Wikipedia's notability requirements - please take a look at WP:N and WP:BIO. – ukexpat (talk) 15:10, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
Freelance Whales
Hello, this is the first article I've written and would appreciate advice of whether it is ready to post as an official wikipedia page (it is currently a user space draft)
User:Ledhotjimipepper/Freelance Whales
--Ledhotjimipepper (talk) 14:38, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- Needs significant work. The band does not appear (from the article) to meet notability guidelines - see WP:BAND. (GregJackP (talk) 03:08, 2 February 2010 (UTC))
Transatlantic Literary Studies
User:English 468/Transatlantic literary studies
This article's purpose is to introduce some of the theories and basic introductory information on the relatively new way of studying literature in a transatlantic context. This was compiled by a college class, and I could use some help with some feedback. Thank you. —Preceding unsigned comment added by English 468 (talk • contribs) 19:10, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- This reads like an essay for a university course, rather than an encyclopedia article. Nuujinn (talk) 01:46, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
HOMER:_Micropower_energy_modeling_software
hi, I would appreciate some feedback on this article: User:Cruciblecom/HOMER:_Micropower_energy_modeling_software . I think this topic belongs in Wikipedia because there are many thousands of people around the world using this free software, and it facilitates the integration of multiple power sources in an energy system, specifically conventional and renewables. The software is available for free and is often used in developing countries.
If I can figure it out I'm going to add some pictures to the story.
Many thanks! Lili —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cruciblecom (talk • contribs) 23:53, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- I have done a little reformatting per the Manual of Style. Also at the moment the article is a little promotional in tone (for example, use of the circle-R, which I have removed), and will need to be toned down accordingly. A few more cited sources would be good too. – ukexpat (talk) 19:10, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
Microscan Systems, Inc.
Microscan Systems, Inc. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Tstraws/Microscan_Systems,_Inc.
Tabitha Straws 2/1/1010Tstraws (talk) 23:56, 1 February 2010 (UTC)
- Two major problems: first it is very promotional in tone - the opening sentence is right out of the Marketing 101 handbook; second, you need to cite some significant coverage in reliable sources to demonstrate notability per WP:CORP. If you don't fix these issues soon, the article will, I am afraid, be tagged for speedily deletion. – ukexpat (talk) 19:03, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
User:Junemillom/Ambrose Hotel, Barrow-In-Furness
hi, my first page (hopefully of many as I plan to do a serries of pages on local pubs/hotels that are of note), can I have some feed back please. User:Junemillom/Ambrose Hotel, Barrow-In-Furness — Preceding unsigned comment added by Junemillom (talk • contribs)
- I moved the article to Ambrose Hotel as there is no need for the "Barrow-in-Furness" disambiguation. I also tidied up the text, fixed some typos, added some wikilinks, and some categories. You will need to find some more sources to support notability - at the moment the article is not showing the significant coverage in reliable sources required, hence the maintenance tags that I have added. – ukexpat (talk) 02:00, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
- I also found a suitably licensed image at the Geograph project (an excellent source by the way), so I uploaded it to Commons and added it to the article. It's a little small and a higher resolution one would be much better, but it will do for now. – ukexpat (talk) 02:53, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Prince EX03 Red Racquet
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Zach_emory/Prince_O3_Red
Prince EX03 Red
This is an article about a racquet from the EX03 Prince series and lists specs, professional players who have used it, etc. It is not meant to be an advertisement, but rather a source of information for those who are interested in the racquet. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Zach emory (talk • contribs) 03:24, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
- The article does read like an advertisement--you've got a large quote in there from the manufacturer, and your references are the manufacturer and a vendor website. I suggest dropping the quote, and getting some references into the article from sources not associated with the manufacture or sale of the racquet. If this racquet is notable, there should be some interviews or magazine articles about it.Nuujinn (talk) 12:55, 5 February 2010 (UTC)
- As it is "fairly new" it is unlikely to meet the notability requirements. – ukexpat (talk) 18:57, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
DarkSpace
I have done extensive copyediting for the article DarkSpace and added over 30 references. The article still needs a few more sources, some copyediting, and maybe an image or two. (large diff link) Any feedback on what else it needs would be appreciated. Thanks! --Culix (talk) 05:00, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Spoke fund
To Whom It May Concern,
I would like feedback on my drafted article. This is about a new investment option model, called a "spoke fund". The article contrasts spoke funds from mutual funds, hedge funds, and separately managed accounts.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Islainvest/Spoke_fund
Islainvest (talk) 06:52, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Lily Adamczyk
HI, I am trying to write about the Artist Lily Adamczyk and I could use some feedback please. I would also like help posting some of her pictures into the article. This is my very first article.
Thanks Oils4you (talk) 21:51, 2 February 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Oils4you (talk • contribs) 08:30, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Brand Tribalism
Hi I have added more relevant citations for your approval. The article is called Brand Tribalism
Thanks you.
Jozette Heerman (talk) 12:12, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Article on Enzo Mucci
Hello I am created a page on the British Coach Enzo Mucci, I would like any feedback on this before I publish it. The URL is as follows - http://en.wikipedia.org/enwiki/w/index.php?title=User:Rossomonte/Enzo_Mucci&oldid=341291280 —Preceding unsigned comment added by Rossomonte (talk • contribs) 14:08, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
- Have a look at WP:BIO, it will give you some pointers as to what is expected of a biography article. At the present time their is no indication of why the gentlemen is notable and there are no independent third party references to back up the information. Paste Let’s have a chat. 15:37, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
Dr. Chris E. Stout
User:Global initatives/Dr. Chris E. Stout This article discusses some of the awards and contributions of Dr. Stout. It focuses mostly on his newest project, the Center for Global Initiatives. --Global initatives (talk) 16:54, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
- Please read WP:NPOV and WP:BIO, you would also seem from your username to have a close affiliation with the subject, indeed your username could be considered promotional, please see WP:USERNAME. Happy to help with any questions. Paste Let’s have a chat. 17:12, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
André Fernandes
I wrote and article on André Fernandes, a Portuguese composer (for film and tv) and musician, I'd like to have some feedback.
--Udenied (talk) 17:55, 2 February 2010 (UTC)
kaiserbahnhof halbe
Collapsing draft article text
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New article name is Kaiserbahnhof Halbe Background The town of Halbe is about 40 km south east of Berlin. Northeast of the town is a level crossing from the main street which leads to the train station for Halbe. Parallel to the railway track about 10 meters apart from each other to the north is the Public Station Building and to the south the extraordinary and historic listed property, the Royal train station building, also known as the Royal reception building. In older sources and on postcards the station is also known as the Emperor Station or is designated the Imperial Hunting Seat for the Hohenzollern family. History The history of Halbe station is closely linked with the development of the Prussian railway system. After 1838 the first Prussian railroad track had already been opened from Berlin to Potsdam. In the following decade further fast connections to the capital Berlin were developed. A second rapid development phase of the railway began in the 1860’s. In little more than a decade the number of the tracks emanating from Berlin doubled. The Cottbus from Görlitz line The first new building of this second phase was the Berlin connection with Cottbus from Görlitz. A royal decree of 1858 smoothed the way for the line's construction. Bethel Henry Strousbergs, the railway king of this time, formed the Berlin Görlitzer Railway Company. A cabinet order of May 1864 approved the building of the railway by Strousberg's corporation. The initial distance to Cottbus was completed in 1866, and to Görlitz the 1867. The main station in Berlin was designed in 1866-68 by August Orth. The Halbe train station on this line was used from 1866 until just before the First World War in 1912 when the building was adapted for other uses, primarily by reducing the installation of partitions and with the height of the rooms being reduced with false ceilings. Furthermore a single-storey porch was added to the structure to the south and the goods sheds to the north were extended. The Architect August Orth The Royal reception building was designed by the renowned Berlin architect, August Orth. The building, probably a gift of the railway company to the kaiser, served as starting point for his hunts in the extensive forests surrounding Halbe. The kaiser and later emperors used the Royal reception building, which was administered by a house yard master, on only three occasions. August Orth was one of the most important architects in Berlin in the second half of the 19th Century. Beside numerous churches (e.g. the 1865 Zionskirche in Berlin) he was particularly famous as the architect and planners for the rapidly developing railway network. He is regarded as one the founding fathers of Berlin's metropolitan railway. From the 1860s he was the preferred architect of the railway tycoon Bethel Henry Strousbergs, for which he sketched in 1867/68 a splendid palace and from 1868 the large cattle and slaughterhouse in Berlin's Wedding district. The buildings for the Berlin Görlitzer railway, which also developed from the Strousberg's connection, are an outstanding example of Orth’s work. The most important building was thereby the 1866-68 established large representative reception building in Berlin. SHis most famous was the Gorlitzer railway station, which was destroyed in World War Two. The site has a small cafe in the remaining building and is a large park. The Royal reception building in Halbe is an important example of Royal train stations by this the architect August Orth. The architecture of the Station Building That Station reception building the station Halbe is a red building of exposed bricks, whose wall surfaces are highlighted with horizontal strips by yellowish clay bricks. It consists actual reception building adjacent to the single-storey goods shed to the north directly with a ticket hall, restaurant and official residence as well as other facilities. The simple decoration of the building is completed by ornaments such as round windows. The exterior of the Royal Train Station building Royal reception building is a rectangular, single-storey building of exposed red bricks with four towers and a entry extending into the large freestanding area to the east of the building. The towers each open in in each case five arched arcades to the free standing area to the east and to the railway tracks to the west. At the track side there were formerly two entrances. From the free standing area the entrance was possible by those on horse and carriage. It was crowned by an eagle carved out of red stone. The wall surfaces consists of red clay bricks horizontally laid and broken by bands of yellow clay bricks. All joints are mortared with red joint mortar. Straight-lineness and regularity of the brick-work are emphasized by a joint line. The upper evel is surrounded by a parapet wall, which incorporates the remaining window and wall openings. The interior of the Royal Train Station The inside of the Royal receipt building comprises three complex curved rooms with magnificent painted ceilings. In the design drawings these are called 'Vestibul', 'Waiting rooms of the Kaiser' and 'Salon for the Attendants'. Finally there was a 'Toilet & closet' as well as an area for the servants. With the 1912 changes partition walls and an intermediate ceiling were inserted, the original space remaining hidden above the intermediate cover. Golden painted stucco ribs with narrow bundle staffs are visible comprising oak leaves and shells. A spiral staircase in the northeast tower gives access to the first floor. The Halbe Station Buildings - an ensemble With the Station reception building and Royal reception building Halbe ensemble of station buildings is unique in Brandenburg. First both buildings are important examples Prussian railway buildings in the second half of the 19th Century. Other comparable Royal reception buildings Royal reception building in Halbe documents the railway company's enthusiasm for assisting the Kaisers. The building is the earliest example of a building reserved for the Kaiser and his guests in Brandenburg. Comparable buildings are the later Kaiser stations in Zehdenick Neuhof (1888) and Joachimsthal (1899) and Potsdam (1906). [edit] References Bidlungswerk Brandenburg der Deutschen Gesellschaft e.V. |
—Preceding unsigned comment added by Petermacky (talk • contribs) 01:14, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
Draft at: User:Petermacky/Kaiserbahnhof Halbe
N.G.J. Ballanta
New article: N.G.J. Ballanta about an early 20th century West African composer and music scholar. User:Becky Brock Kiel/N.G.J. Ballanta Becky Brock Kiel (talk) 06:51, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
Portofino framework
I wrote a new article about the Portofino framework. It is currently under my personal page and available for your review.
Portofino is an open-source web application framework written in Java and based on model-driven engineering. It was already mentioned by others in Model-driven engineering, Commercial open source applications, Domain-driven design and Metamodeling, often as "ManyDesigns Portofino".
Predonzani (talk) 10:58, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
Liberty Island expanded and re-organized articleDjflem (talk) 14:14, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
Aage Giodesen
Aage_Giodesen Article is about the Danish artist Aage Giodesen with a number of references, and includes an example of his work from Wikimedia. --whb123 (talk) 15:05, 3 February 2010 (UTC)Whbonney 2/3/10
Skirmish Paintball
I am requesting feedback for Skirmish Paintball
Skirmish paintball is one of the leading Paintball Networks across the UK, providing thousands and thousands of customers with paintball games across the UK, and so far there is no mention of it on Wikipedia.
Chriscollins405 (talk) 16:12, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
LindaFowler/Princeton Symphony Orchestra
Dear Wikipedia editors:
Would you kindly review the following draft for Princeton Symphony Orchestra? Many thanks and best,
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Lindafowler/The_Princeton_Symphony_Orchestra
Lindafowler (talk) 18:47, 3 February 2010 (UTC)Linda Fowler 2/3/10
Enviralment
Hello, I'm a new member to Wikipedia and this is my first of hopefully many submissions. I figured I would start with something small and easy like the site Enviralment to ensure that I get the submission process down pat before moving on to bigger and lengthier submissions. The work I'm submitting is a Canadian blog called Enviralment, which is similar to Small Dead Animals and others of that ilk. It has been featured on some predominant Canadian sites, most notably The Green Party of Canada.
I would appreciate some feedback and opinions on my first submission.
Thanks you.
--Weemz (talk) 19:30, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
Mark Collard
I've posted this article about User:In2play/Mark Collard who has been instrumental in popularising and developing the field of adventure education in Australia. He has also written 3 top-selling texts in regards activities used in the field. This is only a start, and I am still looking for more sources to add further information about his accomplishments over the past 20 years. I'm looking for feedback, as this is my first Wikipedia article contribution.
I woudl liek to get some feedback about how to create those boxes which appear in top right-hand side which give vital stats, such as DOB, spouse, kids, etc.
cheers, Will 4 Feb 2010 In2play (talk) 01:55, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
Global Samaritans
Check this article on the non-profit Global Samaritans.
User:Sporter85/Global Samaritans
Sporter85 (talk) 02:26, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
- The article may not meet the notability criteria of WP:CLUB. Please provide some more third party references to substantiate the notability of the organization. Thanks. -Reconsider! 07:37, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
Granary Buildings, Leeds
Any feedback on this article would be welcome.
This is an important, historic building but there doesn't seem to be any mention of it in the Leeds and Liverpool Canal or Architecture of Leeds articles.
EricPolymath (talk) 09:30, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
Playground (2009 film)
I would appreciate a review of an article on the documentary, Playground, (2009 film) User:Ekso8/Playground (2009 film) which focuses on the child sex trade in the United States and was released last year. The film was directed by Libby Spears and its executive producers include George Clooney, Grant Heslov and Steven Soderbergh.
Ekso8 (talk) 18:42, 4 February 2010 (UTC)
Micro-mega rule
I am asking your response to my article 'Micro-mega rule', which was posted on January 25, 2010. It was posted as "this page is a new unreviewed article", but I cannot see it now in Wikipedia. Is it accepted? Can I receive some feedback?
Josep Colomer February 5, 2010
<e-mail redacted> —Preceding unsigned comment added by 83.54.199.217 (talk) 09:42, 5 February 2010 (UTC)
- I cannot find any trace of an article called Micro-mega rule. Are you sure that was its title? What user name did you use to create it? Thanks. – ukexpat (talk) 01:55, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
Summer Leadership Initiative
I have written an article: User:Tschweizer/new article name here I would appreciate any feedback before I go live. This describes a not for profit organization that provides youth leadership programs. Thank you.
Tschweizer (talk) 01:10, 6 February 2010 (UTC) Tom February 5, 2010
- The article says the group was "founded by Tom Schweizer"—is that you? If so, you should read up on Wikipedia's best practices for editors with conflicts of interest and its FAQ for organizations. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 02:40, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
Raptor Conservation
Hello!
I submitted an article about Raptor Conservation concerns as a Conservation Biology class project. Would you please give me some feedback so that I may be rid of the notation above the article?
Thanks!
Mikayla Boche 24.119.206.106 (talk) 05:11, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
Xena: Warrior Princess
Xena: Warrior Princess. Touchy article, with strong and differing opinions. I have recently restructured it, improved style, added bits. Require general feedback on how to improve it further, for self and others who regularly patrol it. Would like reclassification to C/B class if appropriate. Bards (talk) 16:11, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
Commotio
Looking for initial feedback, please - first Wiki contribution. Thank you. OxfordSinger (talk) 16:54, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
North of England Education Conference
North of England Education Conference
My first article - looking for some general feedback and if it needs appropriate tag for improvement.
Many thanks
Davidburnell (talk) 16:59, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
- First, I want to note that this is a very fine effort for a first article.
- While I have some observations, most fall into the optional areas for improvement, as opposed to requirements.
- I was looking for the overall purpose of the conference, and didn't find it clearly stated in the lede or as its own section. Those not familiar with the conference, might reasonably guess it has something to do with education goals, but it isn't obvious whether this means pedagogy, proposed legislation, or what. The best hint is in a section titled "Speakers" but that isn't the place I would look to find a purpose. Consider a separate section to cover the purpose or goals. It probably also belongs in the lede, but be aware that a lede section summarizes the article, so it is not only acceptable to be in both places, it is virtually required.
- On a related point, I wondered if there were some notable deliverables - proposed legislation, proposed organizations or reorganizations of the educational system, white papers, or something else.
- Please check out referencing. You nicely included some references, but the citation style could be improved.
- Please examine the capitalization in the last sentence of your Delegates section (and you can refer to WP:MOSCAPS for help.) In some cases, e.g. Directors of Education, I assume the term is formal and requires capitalization, but I wonder if "Headteachers", "Higher Education", "Health", "Police", and "Voluntary Sector" should be capitalized.
- You have a major heading "Since 2004" and discuss each conference since that date. Is there something special about 2004, or is that simply when you starting an annual summary?
- The annual conferences are a secondary heading (which is fine) but the 2011 conference has a different level heading and a different title structure. I don't see a good reason for this, and would use the same format as for the other conferences.
- In the section on the 2007 conference , you refer to "14 - 19 Learners". I don't know what this means.--SPhilbrickT 22:58, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
War Of Love
I created the article for Christian Singer Sheila Walsh's album User:Hermeyjdi/War Of Love and was looking for feedback on it. Is it ready to post on the main site and if so how do I do that? Hermeyjdi (talk) 18:35, 6 February 2010 (UTC)
- I am afraid that it is not ready to me moved to the mainspace yet. At the moment there are no references from reliable sources to demonstrate that the album meets the notability guidelines set out at WP:NALBUM, and without those it would be quickly nominated for deletion. – ukexpat (talk) 18:50, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
Richard O'Brien (author, collectible toys expert)
Hi - If possible, I'd like some feedback on a collectible toys expert in this article: Richard O'Brien (author/collectible toys expert). It's my first article and I want to be sure it's okay. Anyone who likes toys or comics might be interested in reading it. Thanks AlisonMarek (talk) 01:43, 7 February 2010 (UTC)
- I have moved it to Richard O'Brien (author) which is in line with Wikipedia's naming conventions. I have also reviewed it and made some formatting changes. The main issue is with references - you should try to use in-line citations from the references you are using - please take a look at WP:FOOTNOTE and WP:CITE for assistance or leave me a message on my talk page. Hope this helps. – ukexpat (talk) 02:01, 7 February 2010 (UTC)
- It has now been tagged for deletion as a copyvio of the author's bio on amazon.com. – ukexpat (talk) 18:51, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
P.T. Barnum Awards
P.T. Barnum Awards Hello, looking for feedback on this page on a Tufts University awards show for excellence in the entertainment industry. Please let me know if you see any errors or have more information. Thank you Carchi01 (talk) 22:35, 7 February 2010 (UTC)carchi01 2/5/10
new Article: List_of_countries_by_greenhouse_gas_emissions_per_unit_area - feedback requested
Perhaps an issue is that because the page is based on another list of GHG per capita, some of the text is repeated from the original page.
On the other hand, these lists of countries can get out of hand if too many different lists are put in the same article and, in any case, the whole point of this article is that there are other ways to rank countries other than total GHG emissions or GHG per capita - which are the generally quoted yardsticks.
- Nick —Preceding unsigned comment added by 2SickNick (talk • contribs) 06:14, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
- Sorry, but I don’t feel it is appropriate as an article, which is unfortunate, as you’ve obviously gone to a fair amount of work to create it.
- As you correctly note, there are multiple ways of measuring GHG emissions. I don’t see the value of GHG/area. I read your explanation; it didn’t persuade me, but I’ll emphasize, it isn’t particularly important to try to persuade me. What is important is to find reliable sources discussing GHG as a ratio to area as a meaningful measure. Short of that, the article is Original Research which is strictly prohibited.
- As an alternative, if you are convinced that it has value as a measure, you can persuade a reliable source to publish your research. If it catches on, it will then be appropriate for Wikipedia.SPhilbrickT 16:38, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
- Could it be relevant to the idea of ecological footprint? In any case, you do need to explain exactly why such an article could be useful. Itsmejudith (talk) 18:02, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
I don't entirely see your point about it being "original research" All I've done is to take existing tables of data that are themselves encyclopaedic and combine them together. maybe I've combined it in a new way, but it doesn't seem so unusual to me. Seems as if I need to learn more about the purpose and style of Wikipedia, anyway. Thanks for the feedback. 2SickNick (talk) 00:39, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
OK, I've now read "What Wikipedia is not, and the no-original-thought clause is clearly valid Wikipedia:NOT#Wikipedia is not a publisher of original thought. I'll use the page somewhere else and maybe one day it's results will be posted back here by a third party! —Preceding unsigned comment added by 2SickNick (talk • contribs) 00:31, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- Glad you understand. Sometimes it seems odd to some that original thoughts would actually be discouraged, but it does make some sense. Good luck getting it published elsewhere. --SPhilbrickT 03:58, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
Joseph M. Sabol--Request for review
User:Picman6500/Joseph M. Sabol
This article is about Joseph M Sabol. An American Videographer who produced a documentary video on the 3 Mile Island Steam Generator Transport. This over land hauling project was the largest in US History. To do what he did was next to impossible. Joe did this entire production by himself at the request of KMX International, the company responsible for the over land transport.
From what I understand , he shot this video covering 70 miles in 30 days, film style. If you were able to see the obstacles in this job, you would appreciate this. The companies that were involved have been nominated for awards in their respective industries for the highest achievement possible using the video Joseph shot. Joseph did an amazing job and since he is a product of Parma Ohio, we (the authors ) feel he is notable.
We request a review so that we can correct any problems so it is published on Wikipedia and the other reason is that we feel not only that this article is worthy of publication but if it were not for the Security Issues involved, the media would have picked this up much sooner than it did. As it was, there was a News Media Center established in the same place as they used during the nuclear accident. Joseph was the only one allowed to videotape this entire project from the actual off loading on the Deleware to the arrival at 3 Mile Island. This is unprecedented.
Thank You
Siduanil (talk) 15:36, 8 February 2010 (UTC)Sidu Anil, Author, 2/08/2010
- The article, which is currently at User:Picman6500/new_article_name_here, has a number of issues, most importantly notability. There is no clear assertion as to why Mr. Sabol or his company meet Wikipedia notability criteria. You could make a case for the notability of the transport of the steam generators, if it was the largest overland transport in US history (citation needed though), but that fact would not confer notability on the person who filmed it. The documentary itself may be notable enough for an article, if it attracts sufficient interest and media attention. It is conceivable that J & J Video Productions meets the criteria through its work, so the article might stand a better chance of sticking if it was about J & J rather than its owner. In any case, you will need to assert notability clearly, preferably in the lead section, before this article is ready to go live, and support it with reliable independent third-party citations. If you believe this is about a unique and unprecedented person or event, you need citations to confirm this.
- Once notability is established, the tone of the article needs some work. The present version reads in parts like Mr. Sabol’s resume and in parts like promotional literature for his company. Phrases like “being somewhat of a visionary” are POV. Individuals should be referred to by their surnames (“Sabol” rather than “Joe” or “Joseph”) (see WP:MOS). Where specific assertions are made, such as the “national recognition” of J & J, the uniqueness of the steam generator transport etc., these should be supported with inline citations. Finally, you currently have external links embedded in the text, which is incorrect for Wikipedia. Many of these need to be changed to internal Wikilinks (such as Kutztown State University and Pat Garrett). Some others should be replaced with inline citations that confirm specific assertions, and any remaining relevant external links, such as the link to J & J’s official website, should be placed in an External links section at the bottom of the article.
- NB: You describe yourself as the "authors", but the article appears to have been created by User:Picman6500. Please read WP:Multiple accounts and WP:Role account to ensure you are editing according to Wikipedia policy. Karenjc 11:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Raleigh Downtown Live
User:DeepSouth2010/Raleigh Downtown Live Raleigh Downtown Live
(DeepSouth2010 (talk) 18:21, 8 February 2010 (UTC))
- It's not clear to me whether this is supposed to be an article about the event or a list of acts that have appeared at the event. Either way there are notability issues. You will need to find significant coverage in reliable sources to demonstrate notability. The event's own website doesn't count as it is a self-reference, but press coverage would be ideal. – ukexpat (talk) 18:47, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
Centage
This is my first article. I'm researching budgeting companies for a college task and believe this work in process has great information. It is not complete, but I want to be sure I'm doing things correctly.
Jacobsassoon (talk) 22:32, 8 February 2010 (UTC)
- In its current state, it reads like an advertisement for the company's products. If you're writing about the corporation, I think more information about the corp. would be appropriate.Nuujinn (talk) 03:22, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
Opium and Romanticism
I just wrote the article and was hoping to get some feedback on it. It is about the presence of opium during the Romantic era in England, and it focuses on three different arguments about its ability to influence literary creation. It ends with some examples of famous Romanticists and their creations. Please let me know what you think!
Aoleson88 (talk) 03:56, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
- It looks to me like an essay assignment, which is not appropriate for Wikipedia.
- I suggest you read the What Wikipedia is not policy page; in particular, the sections on Wikipedia is not a publisher of original thought ("Although Wikipedia is supposed to compile human knowledge, it is not a vehicle to make opinions become part of such knowledge") and Wikipedia is not a manual, guidebook, textbook, or scientific journal ("The purpose of Wikipedia is to present facts, not to teach subject matter"). Perhaps the article title should be redirected to Opium#Cultural references instead? Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 05:34, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
I have edited some of the information. It was not an essay assignment--I think the last line in the Overview made it appear that way. Does this look any better? Aoleson88 (talk) 04:44, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- Well, just starting with the first paragraph I see a number of style and wording issues (but I'm new at this). Using the word "ensnared" is probably not the best choice--it's not really neutral. "what is most commonly recognized" is passive voice and not referenced--I studied comp lit for about 14 years, and personally I don't regard opium as a "creative counterpart" to literature and poetry--and the important thing about that is both mine and and the position you put into the paragraph are points of view, and don't belong in an encyclopedia article. Likewise, if you want to assert that there were three different views of the effects of opium on Romantic Lit, you need to supply a verifiable reference. And it seems from the later text that these three views are from three people; Abrams, Schnieder and Hayter. Are there not more proponants of each position you could cite?
- It gets better further on, but you might consider rewording parts of it to make the references clearer in the prose (eg. "Soandso has argued that Coleridge's use of opium interfered with his ability to finish Cristobal and Kubla Kahn"). For example, the Opium, Real Images, and Dreaming as a Channel section reads well, but it's unclear to me if the entirety of that section is Hayter's opinions, or comes from other sources as well. It might help if you think of this as an article on the different views of the effects of opium use on English romantic authors,
- I think you have a nice start here, though, good work! Nuujinn (talk) 01:15, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you so much for your feedback! It was very helpful! When I re-read the article I definitely saw what you meant about it sounding somewhat skewed instead of impartial. I'm still editing, so we will see how it goes! Thanks again! Aoleson88 (talk) 16:30, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
- Glad to help, it's a good topic, I wrote my comp lit senior page on opium and coleridge. Drop me a note on my talk page or here when you're down with another round of edits, and I'll take a look. Nuujinn (talk) 01:43, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- Just took a look at the revised version, it looks like it's much better. Could someone else take a look and see what else needs to be done before it can be moved into real space? Nuujinn (talk) 01:00, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Denielle Hann
New to Wiki. Please provide feedback/edits on Denielle Hann. It must also be posted to wiki by someone who has that ability.
Thanks very much Nlmusicguy (talk) 15:23, 9 February 2010 (UTC)Nlmusicguy 09 Feb 2010
Review LTX-Credence article
Two companies have merged, updating the historical data. Easy review. Ref'ed AP article on the subject, sourced by the newly merged company. Rbenech (talk) 22:21, 9 February 2010 (UTC)
Sean Quinn (writer)
Article Name: Sean Quinn (writer)
I'd welcome some general feedback--I know the article needs more content--and I'm working on that. I also would like help directing people to this article, for instance, if you search for "Sean Quinn" an Irish Businessman comes up with no direct link to Sean Quinn the White House Press Corps writer. Thank you,
IYHBerry —Preceding unsigned comment added by Iyhberry (talk • contribs) 02:04, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
- I don't entirely know if this should be an independent article just yet, as there may need to be more significant coverage of this individual from third-party sources. Could be mistaken. In any case, the references need proper formatting, the mentioning of President Obama should likely include a link to his article, and "on the ground" might read better if it were hyphenated. Also, the first biographical ref didn't directly lead to a page which verified its claim. -- James26 (talk) 08:32, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
- I've cleaned up the article a little (removing unsourced info, adding more citations) but it could still use some (sourced) expansion. The main thing it needs now, though, is another incoming link or two. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 01:45, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
Bill Zadick
I've written a biography article for User:Rosalita923/Bill_Zadick, a US amateur wrestler who has won a world championship. It's the first article I've ever created, so I'd be grateful for any and all feedback regarding anything you feel needs to be added, deleted, or cited differently.
Many thanks! --Rosalita923 (talk) 17:27, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
Blik
I would appreciate any feedback for the post I wrote about blik - a cool wall graphics company in Venice. thanks
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Hkoop/blik
Hkoop (talk) 23:11, 10 February 2010 (UTC)
- Well, your citations are malformed, see WP:Cite for more info. Also, I'm not sure you have established notibility, the article could use more 2nd and 3rd party references. And this reads pretty much like an advertisement--making the prose more neutral and less enthusiatic would help. Nuujinn (talk) 23:02, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
Wishabi
I would appreciate any feedback and/or edits to this article that I've created about Wishabi, a Canadian based online shopping service. I've read all the guidelines and tried to follow them as much as possible before moving it from user space to public space. It's looking for editing, proofreading and any other changes that would make it a good Wikipedia article. Any feedback is welcomed, and I'll do my very best to fix or improve this article. Thanks! Mkpauling (talk) 04:01, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
- To your credit, it's well written and I think you have included enough external sources to be able to argue for notability. But the article reads as if you're somehow associated with the company and have written an advertisement. Nuujinn (talk) 00:44, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
Brett Wood
(Pmdance (talk) 12:52, 11 February 2010 (UTC))
- I'm assuming that you're asking for feedback on User:Pmdance/Brett Wood (the article you created) and not Brett Wood (as you linked to above). The article looks promising, but it needs references for statements like "Brett has recorded on many Australian albums". Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 19:37, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
New Article: American Car Designer Eric Stoddard
Request to review information about Automobile Designer Eric Stoddard. Review resources on related car designs, please.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_Stoddard
Speedstudio (talk) 13:14, 11 February 2010 (UTC) SpeedStudioDesign.com
You have a decent amount of resources. I don't really see anything wrong. Maybe remove some of the duplicate content under "Career."
Aimelise (talk) 13:50, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
Tito in ekšn
Tito in ekšn punk rock group from the 90s
Hardys Animal Farm (User:Thestuarthardy/Hardys_Animal_Farm)
User:Thestuarthardy/Hardys Animal Farm is a page I'm looking to submit for promotion to the main wikipedia site, describing a large tourist attraction and the features found on it. I have read all the tutorial articles, and this is my first attempt that I've put together for public consumption. However, I was looking to get some feedback from those of you who are more experienced at this and some pointers to ensure the content of the page is appropriate.
Please have a look through and give me your feedback (however critical!) and I'll do my best to apply your suggestions to the article.
Thanks in advance, Stuart Hardy
Thestuarthardy (talk) 18:01, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
New article /* Cumbre Judicial Iberoamericana */
Hello to everybody
I'd like to request for feedback about my new article "Cumbre Judicial Iberoamericana" (Latinamerican Judicial Summit). The summit is a non profit organization which involves al the Latinamerican judiciaries, plus Andorra, Spain and Portugal.
At the moment I work for the General Council for the Spanish Judiciary, and this is the institution which runs the permanent secretariat of the related summit.
The General Council has already taken an agreement in order to authorize this article at wikipedia.
Thanks to all for your feedback
Jorge
Jcarrera747 (talk) 18:45, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- Assuming that you're referring to Cumbre Judicial Iberoamericana, it's got one huge problem: it's not in English. Maybe you should post it at http://es.wikipedia.org instead? The English language Wikipedia is for articles in English. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 19:43, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
Harley Sherman Manuel
Harley Sherman Manuel
Looking for feedback on this document. Waiting on resource from JSTOR to corroborate story. Don't have access to dbase.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Arlsphinx/new_article_name_here —Preceding unsigned comment added by Arlsphinx (talk • contribs) 18:49, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
Arlsphinx (talk) 18:46, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- I don't believe this person will meet the Notability standards. Being a Doctor isn't inherently notable. I see a peer-reviewed paper, so the specific relevant standard is WP:ACADEMIC. It doesn't appear to me that he qualifies.--SPhilbrickT 18:32, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
French Bull, LLC
French Bull, LLC http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User_talk:161e61 fb161 2/11/10161e61 (talk) 19:09, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- At the moment the draft is way too promotional in tone (please read WP:Spam) to be moved to the mainspace. It also will need references to significant coverage in reliable sources to support notability per WP:CORP. – ukexpat (talk) 20:02, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
A beginner here, writing an article about an established Japanese musician and producer who ironically does not have much information posted about him on the web. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Elliotmc (talk • contribs) 22:32, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
Uyama Hiroto
A beginner here, writing an article about an established Japanese musician and producer who ironically does not have much information posted about him on the web. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Elliotmc/Uyama_Hiroto —Preceding unsigned comment added by Elliotmc (talk • contribs) 22:33, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- With just three sentences and no verifiable sources, I think it will take some more work. References do not have to be web based--magazine and newspaper articles are fine if correctly referenced. Nuujinn (talk) 00:30, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
SeeClickFix
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Ellioteaton/SeeClickFix [[user:Ellioteaton/SeeClickFix]
Hi, I'm new to Wiki and I think I've followed all the guidelines pretty well, I just wanted to make sure the formatting on this is correct. Any suggestions are appreciated!
Ellioteaton (talk) 22:39, 11 February 2010 (UTC)
- There are serious issues with Notability Very few links to reliable sources. One of your best links, to the NYTimes, was messed up. I partially fixed it, but you ought to look at WP:CITE to cite it properly. Find a way to use the NYT reference in the article, as opposed to simply in the list of external links. (External links do not count when assessing notability).
- As it stands, if it were proposed for deletion, I'd be hard pressed to disagree, but if you can add more reliable sources, it will help.--SPhilbrickT 17:41, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
This is a new article which i just moved to mainspace, i would like both help and feedback on tidying it up. Thanks mark nutley (talk) 10:48, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
- It needs a lot of work - reference citation style and general cleanup. I'll try to make some of the fixes myself.--SPhilbrickT 15:11, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
- After further review, I agree that this article is redundant given Criticism of the IPCC AR4. While an argument can be made for a broad article covering all criticism of the IPCC, rather than just AR4, virtually everything in this article relates to AR$. Consequently I will support the AfD (subject to merging an unique, relevant material). You obviously have interest in the subject, but that interest would be better served improving the existing article. --SPhilbrickT 15:20, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
Hi I'm preparing a new article about the Scottish writer, Mark Fleming. I believe he is notable because his work is concerned with promoting a positive image of mental health issues.
Would appreciate feedback about the layout / content of this article.
(When previewed, why do hyperlinks appear as numbers rather than text - is this something to do with hyperlinks needing to be verified?) —Preceding unsigned comment added by ColinKNewman (talk • contribs) 13:16, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
- Rather than [http://www.laurahird.com/], try <ref>[http://www.laurahird.com/ this is the laura bird website]</ref>. See WP:CITEHOW. You could temporarily add a {{reflist}} during the preview, if you wanted to see how it would look. Usually only one {{reflist}} is in an article, at the bottom. jmcw (talk) 13:33, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
Fry-Wagner Moving & Storage
Fry-Wagner Moving & Storage is at article about a notable company in the moving industry. The article is linked and referenced. I would appreciate your feedback. Thanks!
Kristy860 (talk) 14:34, 12 February 2010 (UTC)
- To establish notability, you need to use verifiable references, and in this case all of your references appear to be from Fry-Wagner and UVL. Also, the article appears to be an advertisement more than anything else, see WP:NPOV for what you should strive for.
- The timeline is done as a list and I think that would be better rendered in prose, and fleshed out with more details. Nuujinn (talk) 00:26, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
obselidia
Hi,
this is the first time I've ever written for wikipedia, not sure if I've got it right. In particular, I couldn't figure out how to post the reference to an article I quote.
Thank you for your patience and your help.
Best Deebstar (talk) 05:12, 13 February 2010 (UTC)deebstar
- Unfortunately, your article contains very little. Among other issues, it has no reliable sources. You asked specifically about posting a reference - check out WP:CITE and footnotes --SPhilbrickT 18:03, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
Health Advocate Inc.
I would like to have my article Health Advocate Inc. reviewed.
Thanks for your help, Arianne13 (talk) 09:38, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
- Looks like a good start! I've done a llttle cleaning up and editing to make it more wiki-like. I also moved it to Health Advocate, as we don't use the Inc. part of the company's name in the article title. The article could still really use some incoming links. Dori ❦ (Talk ❖ Contribs ❖ Review) ❦ 10:36, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
Teaching Writing in the United States
Teaching Writing in the United States
I posted this article on Feb 6 and have not yet received feedback. How should I go about getting feedback on this article?
Diana Leddy (talk) 15:02, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
- Nice article. I made some minor stylistic changes.
- My main observations:
- Two of the sections start in a style that seems more suited to essay writing than encyclopedia writing. One starts "Sensing a serious gap...". The other starts "Emerging from both the Writing Process...". I don't know whether the format is officially discouraged, but I didn't like it.
- The lede is too cryptic. Check out WP:LEAD, in particular "The lead should be able to stand alone as a concise overview of the article."--SPhilbrickT 16:56, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
Kasapuram
A small village located in the Guntakal Mandal area of Anantapur district in the southern state of Andhra Pradesh in India. Kasapuram is famous for it's Lord Nettikanti Anjaneya temple which carries it's history way back from 16th Century, a period of Vijayanagara Samrajya of Sri Krishna Devaraya.
The Village attracts interest because of the Hanuman Temple whose annual income can be said to have crossed Rs. 2 Crores due to evergrowing amount of pilgrimage. About half of the Village's population depends on the Temple for livelihood directly or indirectly.
Kasapuram can be divided into two parts by the main road, where one part is the proper village and the other being the Temple area. The Temple area is said to have had a name called "Nettikallu" which is the base for the Lord's name "Nettikanti" currently. The temple area looks quite developed because of a huge pilgrimage and income of the Temple. The Village borders the Anantapur district area adjoining Maddikera village of Kurnool district.
References http://www.apendowments.gov.in/Kasapuram/Pages/Home.aspx —Preceding unsigned comment added by Vinay.kvc (talk • contribs) 15:24, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
- This is not a place to write an article, but to ask for feedback about an article you have written elsewhere. Check out Wikipedia:Article wizard 2.0 for an easy way to start your article.--SPhilbrickT 16:59, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
Rockbridge Rapids Baseball
Rockbridge Rapids Baseball
User:Stogieman/Rockbridge Rapids Baseball
How do I move the draft to the main page? Stogieman (talk) 22:34, 13 February 2010 (UTC)
- It's not yet ready for the main page. You need to establish Notability through the use of reliable sources as references. While it looks like you have one reference, it isn't properly formed. Check out footnotes for help, and one will not be enough.--SPhilbrickT 03:18, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
Zibbet
I'm new to Wiki and would love some feedback
ACraftyArab (talk) 06:36, 14 February 2010 (UTC)Kay Tarapolsi, Feb 13, 2010ACraftyArab (talk) 06:36, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
- Sorry but it reads like WP:PROMOTION. Wikipedia article must meet Notability standards, this one has not met that standard.SPhilbrickT 16:01, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
Reconnective Therapy
Reconnective Therapy Reconnective Therapy ```` —Preceding unsigned comment added by Psullivan7 (talk • contribs) 13:03, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
Eckhard Stratmann-Mertens
The name of my article is Eckhard Stratmann-Mertens, a founding member of the German Green Party and one of the first Green Party members to be elected to the German parliament. (A group of 28 were sent all at once.) Additionally, Mr. Stratmann-Mertens was the first Green to speak in the Bundestag (parliament).
This article is essentially a translation from the German Wikipedia article. Finding new information in a newspaper article, which was not in the original German article, some of my article is different from the original.
Anyone familiar with translation knows that one must always choose between translating word-for-word and making it read like a well-written text. Translating word-for-word results in very awkward writing, full of strange grammar and syntax. To make things sound better in English (my native language), I re-wrote some of the original, staying true to the information contained in it.
I have revised this article a number of times, improving the writing and look of the page and I think it's ready to go live. Then the lists and articles where Mr. Stratmann-Merten's name already exists on English and German Wikipedia pages can be linked to this article.
Thanks!
Marrante (talk) 16:09, 14 February 2010 (UTC) Valentine's Day
- It's good and nearly ready to go live. You did the right thing in not sticking too closely to the German, because en.wikipedia doesn't have to be exactly the same as de.wikipedia. A few minor points.
- Start with the subject's name in bold, and with his alternative name (formerly known as...) . After that, only use his surname. I thought the corduroys and open-necked shirt were relevant, but what he said wasn't. Perhaps there is a nuance in the German that is impossible to translate (was this much more informal than the usual first speech, for example?) You could just leave it out. In the lede you can just say he is a school teacher and give the details later. The name of the school doesn't need to be in twice. No need for links to articles in German wiki. Thanks very much for your contribution. Itsmejudith (talk) 14:10, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
- Hi and thanks for responding. I have made all the recommended changes, re-working some of it to make the copy (as in copywriting, not duplicate) flow better. The significance of the quote is that in his introduction, Stratmann-Mertens addressed the citizens of Germany before the members of parliament. I have added that information to the article, but left out the actual quote. I think the description in prose is sufficient.
- I hope this can now go live.
- Quick question — not sure how to search for the answer, so I hope it's okay to ask here. I notice that some pages seem to go live with a "redirect" from the User page. Why is that sometimes done and can that be avoided with this contribution of mine?
- Marrante (talk) 17:31, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
- The move will automatically generate a redirect. When I write a new article, I do it in user space, then move it into main space, then delete the redirect.--SPhilbrickT 17:58, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks! Marrante (talk) 17:27, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- The move will automatically generate a redirect. When I write a new article, I do it in user space, then move it into main space, then delete the redirect.--SPhilbrickT 17:58, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- Marrante (talk) 17:31, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
Scientific Anomalies
There is a growing public mistrust of scientific announcements with Global Warming the latest to be under attack. The essay suggests a number of anomalies that should be more widely publicised. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Michael Nettleton (talk • contribs) 16:10, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
- Assuming you are talking about this, sorry, but it reads like an essay. See WP:NOT. While you do have some references, these are brought together as a WP:SYNTHESIS, which is not appropriate for Wikipedia. SPhilbrickT 15:57, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
The Bar Method
This article was previously deleted. I never saw the original, but wanted to publish my version of The Bar Method. Thank you. 34pin6 (talk) 17:36, 14 February 2010 (UTC)
- I did a quick search in Google [2]. This article seems like advertising: see WP:ADVERT. Try to find some strong third-party source: YouTube is not WP:RELIABLE. jmcw (talk) 14:51, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- A YouTube video can fall under a reliable source, under two conditions:
- 1. If it is a convenience link
- 2. If the video contains information that is deemed a secondary source (see YouTube in the section on reliable sources here)
- It appears in this case, the author is utilizing the YouTube videos - which house the original news stories - in good faith. As for advertising, it does not appear, at least to me, that this stub is anymore advertising-sounding than the entry on, say, Pilates. I think it's a good start. However, I would double check the facts here of the article before publish; the first sentence, for example, doesn't have adequate support. Artemis84 (talk) 21:07, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
I found some better sources: KUSA-TV, KUSI-TV, Huffington Post, San Diego Magazine and a couple others, all covering the Bar Method in depth. Please have a look: Bar Method Draft. 34pin6 (talk) 01:35, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Just had a look at Bar Method. It has a better encyclopedic tone and many media references to establish notability. The article would be still better if you could find any reference to support the technical description or a reference from a third-party review of the system. Congratulations! jmcw (talk) 13:29, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Crazy Waiting
user:chasingflowers/crazywaiting A recent South Korean movie that I love. Several of the actors have their own Wikipedia pages already, so I thought it would be notable. Chasingflowers (talk) 01:28, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
Physique 57
Physique 57 Physique57
Please assist me with ensuring this article meets all guidelines for Wikipedia. Thank you.
FitHealthy1 (talk) 05:40, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
- I'm concerned about whether it meets the Notability threshold. You do have references, some of which probably qualify as reliable sources, and some of which may not, but the reliable sources mentioning Physique 57 barely mention it. I'm not familiar enough with the sources you cite to know which qualify and which do not - you might be fine, but this is just a heads up that there could be a problem.
- You have included references, which is good, as many new editors fail on that score, but please look at footnotes and WP:CITE to see how they should be formatted.
- In "Future locations", you say "The first California location will open in May, 2010 at 320 N. Canon Drive in Beverly Hills." Wikipedia has a policy called WP:CRYSTAL, to avoid the problem, you could say "planned to open" or similar wording, and it should have a reference.--SPhilbrickT 17:15, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
Feedback requested, please.
Hello,
May I please get some feedback on the following page?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Weatherlands/European_Climate_Assessment_and_Dataset_%28ECA%26D%29
I would like to make it live as soon as possible since our website, eca.knmi.nl, has been updated as well.
Note: All images are intended to be copyrighted as open to the public. They are generated by "using" the website which anyone can do.
Thanks for your time, please respond in "my talk."
Good day, ~WL
Weatherlands (talk) 10:24, 15 February 2010 (UTC)
- This post says "our website"; what is your connection with this organization? --Orange Mike | Talk 17:45, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
New Europe (newspaper)
This is my first article. Any feedback would be appreciated!
New Europe User:Sintechhs/NewEurope
Sintechhs (talk) 12:50, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- A google search[3] show many references to this newspaper. I suggest that you add more information from the other sources so that the article sounds less like a press release.
- I would also suggest removing the section 'Media Partnerships' because it contains mainly information that will go out-of-date.
- And lastly, consider adding
{{Europe topic|List of newspapers in|title=Lists of newspapers in Europe}}
{{Lists by country}}
[[Category:Lists of newspapers| ]] to the end of the article. jmcw (talk) 15:14, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Please Review- East Meets West Productions
I would really appreciate someone reviewing my article on East Meets West Productions. It was named the Small Business Administration's Minority Small Business of the year. I think the article has good citations and is properly formatted.
Thank you,
NMR2010 (talk) 17:27, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- No, it was named the SBA's Corpus Christi district office MSB of the year; not the same thing! --Orange Mike | Talk 18:06, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
Philosophic Burden of Proof
Originally there was one Burden of Proof article that attempted to deal with both Legal Burden of Proof and Philosophic Burden of Proof. This proved too unwieldy, and we therefore decided to split the article into two. Philocentric (talk) 18:34, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- It seems like you took some very positive and constructive steps, great work! One thing I recommend you try before another big change is to notify the Wikiprojects listed on the top of the article's talkpage. In this case, Wikipedia:WikiProject Law. In fact as this is a specialized area and there are some great editors over there please post this thread to that project's talkpage and ask if some folks could take a look. -- Banjeboi 19:29, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Douglas M. Johnston
LauraICRD (talk) 20:17, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
- I have reviewed the article and removed the new article tag. I added some wikilinks and made some other formatting changes. The article does read like a resumé or curriculum vitae so I have added an appropriate tag and it would appear from your user name that you have a conflict of interest. – ukexpat (talk) 20:40, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
French Bull, LLC Revision
French Bull, LLC[[4]]
I've revised this article any feedback would be outstanding
thank you 2.16.10 161e61 (talk) 21:00, 16 February 2010 (UTC)
HS Beavers
How can I get the infobox to the top of the page?
I used Template:Infobox UK Ultimate —Preceding unsigned comment added by Fuzzybear47 (talk • contribs) 00:26, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- It looks like there is a problem with the template, but it also looks like you created the template. My template skills are limited, but I'll try to see if I can figure it out.--SPhilbrickT 01:22, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- I looked at the template, but I do not see the problem. You might check at the help desk, where there are more volunteers,a nd often some with technical expertise. You might also post here, where editors with interest and expertise with infoboxes can help. BTW, I'm a it surprised they call themselves and Ultimate Frisbee team, most teams I know have dropped the "Frisbee" as the game is often played with other brands of discs.--SPhilbrickT 01:44, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- You have two issues, IMHO. One is the article itself which I'm not sure if you're creating for fun or practice but I posted a welcome template to your talkpage which has some helpful links. The second is the template which as Sphilbrick notes is a bit complicated. I suggest you ask for template help at Help talk:Template, they are very skilled at templates and likely can sort things out. -- Banjeboi 19:41, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Praise
Dear Wikipedia, If I had Wikipedia when I was in school and growing up I today would be a genius. With all the HTML and ways of finding and defining material and information I would have the ego of Texas. I love Wikipedia. It is the absolute best dictionary thesaurus and Encyclopedia on this planet.
You are a Godsend to me. Sincerely <e-mail redacted> —Preceding unsigned comment added by 70.158.128.52 (talk) 02:35, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you for your comment. – ukexpat (talk) 02:39, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
This article concerns the 1946 'Atomic' coffee machine. It is factual and referenced. In the future I hope to add more information but I have already provided good references for the article. The images are my own work. I would be happy to have it reviewed.
- Generally, this is reasonably written. However, references do not establish notability. For instance, blogs (e.g., CoffeeSnobs.org) are not reliable references, and a Google Patent search that shows only the patent abstract and date is dangerously close to original research. Also often surprising to new editors, other Wikipedia articles are not considered reliable sources. Notability requires coverage in reliable sources other than the ones just mentioned, and beyond a commercial web site dedicated to the subject of the article. See Wikipedia:RS and Wikipedia:N for more on reliable sources and notability, respectively. In this case, you might try searching for coverage in art history or art deco publications, like Art Nouveau and the like. One other minor point: Wikipedia's Manual of Style discourages the use of "The" as the first word in an article title. Better to change yours to "Atomic Coffee Machine".Writeswift 17:07, 17 February 2010 (UTC) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Writeswift (talk • contribs)
SEARCH, The National Consortium for Justice Information and Statistics
ResolvedSEARCH, The National Consortium for Justice Information and Statistics
I am new to Wikipedia and would like feedback on which parts sound too much like an advertisement. Thanks!
Chrisatsearch (talk) 15:17, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Ravens & Chimes
Hi Wikipedia community. I would like some help/feedback about my new article Ravens & Chimes that I've posted in my userspace. Any constructive input would be greatly appreciated! Thanks, Baileykwilliams (talk) 18:37, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- Fixed the link to your article, and responded on the talk page. —Akrabbimtalk 19:05, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Joseph Matheny
New unreviewed article/Joseph Matheny
(````) —Preceding unsigned comment added by Setianson (talk • contribs) 18:43, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Edwin Hodge
New unreviewed article/Edwin Hodge
tjbw (talk) 21:03, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
User:Derrynoel/Roland Carl Backhouse
User:Derrynoel/Roland Carl Backhouse
This is my first article and I am attempting to marshal the information into a standard format. I am almost finished but need to get my text into the proper layout. Many thanks. Derrynoel Derrynoel (talk) 21:47, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
Progressive Death Metal
I've been working on a Progressive Death Metal article in my users page, I'd just like someone to have a look before I publish it.
The problem in the past has been that there aren't enough prog death sources but I think I've found enough. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Chairmaneoin (talk • contribs) 22:00, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
- I moved the article off your main user page to a subpage and started a new talkpage ("Discussion" page) just for the article with handy search tools. I also posted a welcome template on your talkpage which has some helpful links. Your goal will be to find a at least a few more sources that don't just mention the subject but actually talk about it. You don't have to source every statement but adding more sources to the first several paragraphs will help. Keep up the good work! -- Banjeboi 23:38, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
History of Hartford City, Indiana
I have added some sections to History of Hartford City, Indiana since it received its initial rating. What does it need to get beyond a "B"? Does it have too much, too little? What is the preferred style of footnotes and references? TwoScars (talk) 01:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
User:Nathan_Winters/Draft_of_MSRRA
I started working on creating an article User:Nathan_Winters/Draft_of_MSRRA and was looking for some feedback. TIA for your time and assistance. Nathan Winters (talk) 02:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- For one thing, it doesn't explain what the bill actually put into law. —Akrabbimtalk 03:16, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Drafts of bills that never passed are not going to pass our tests of notability. This reeks of publicity for the author of the failed bill. --Orange Mike | Talk 03:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- As the article currently stands it is lacking in information and needs to be expanded. You should include what exactly the law does and how it effects spouses. More on the background of the bill would be helpful also, such as, why was the original bill introduced. Additional reliable secondary sources should be included to show notability. The Facebook source should be completely removed. Also just a small point, the Act did pass and President Obama signed it into law on 11 Nov 2009. ~~ GB fan ~~ talk 19:57, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Drafts of bills that never passed are not going to pass our tests of notability. This reeks of publicity for the author of the failed bill. --Orange Mike | Talk 03:35, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Userpages
I notice that a lot of people on here have fancy "user pages" with colorful alignments and great pictures. Wikipedia could save a lot of server space if we just simplify. Western Pines (talk) 07:19, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- The place to propose changes is Wikipedia:Village pump/Proposals rather than here, which is where people can request feedback on articles they have created. Excessively complex user pages are not encouraged, particularly when the content is unrelated to Wikipedia activities, but opinions on appropriate user page content vary considerably. There is guidance on what you can and cannot have on your userpage here. See also WP:PERFORMANCE. Karenjc 12:02, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Tania de Jong
Hi could i please get some feedback on this article?? it's been up for more than 24 hrs but i havent gotten any feedback. anything would be appreciated! thanks in advance :)
Tania de Jong Enyfink135 (talk) 11:52, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- This seems to be your first article – congratulations on a pretty good start, with most boxes ticked. I’ll remove the unreviewed tag. Suggestions: I’d split the current lead section after “in 40 countries” and place the rest of it in a new “biography” section, and expand her personal details a little if relevant info is available (the Morris Kaplan and Lorna Edwards interviews currently cited in “Further links”would seem to be a good source.). The Reviews section lacks checkable citations and is promotional rather than encyclopaedic; it would be better removed altogether. YouTube links are not blanket-banned in Wikipedia but they often involve illegal use of copyrighted material, and videos of shows and newscasts are specifically mentioned as of concern (see guidance here). Unless you can show that your YouTube links don’t breach policy, they are better removed too. The format of some of your Further links needs tweaking, and you need to add categories - I will help out directly with this shortly. Karenjc 12:36, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Jacob Eisenberg (American musician and author)
I would like to get some feedback on this article. I think it's okay, but would just like to run it by the crew here.
This is about a man who was a noted piano author and teacher during the 1920's - 1940's. He was active till his death in 1964. He wrote about 100 articles and a number of books related to teaching piano. He also interviewed a number of world-famous musicians in his day. Because of the era in which he was active, much of his work is hard to come by now, though there are some articles or excerpts on the web and some of his books are available for sale at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and antiquarian sellers online. Of course, I can't use links for Amazon & crew, so I amassed what I could and added the list of his works that I found in his last book, which I own. He also made a very important contribution to another notable person, namely his wife, in that he taught her piano, an act that led to her becoming internationally famous toward the end of her life.
I look forward to any feedback on this article, either here or on my talk page. Thanks in advance! Marrante (talk) 15:26, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- I think it looks pretty good. Nuujinn (talk) 01:45, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you! Marrante (talk) 03:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Making an article 'Live'
I've created an article, but how do I make it 'Live' now? I know it sounds simple, but I can't seem to figure it out... —Preceding unsigned comment added by Newsdoggie (talk • contribs) 17:00, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- If you mean Ross Palombo, it is live.
- Adding references properly looks hard, but it isn't. Come back if you need more help.--SPhilbrickT 17:43, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Michelle Dipp
Can the team review the new article Michelle Dipp?
Holly2305 (talk) 17:18, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- I'm new here, but this looks like a résumé to me. Have a look at WP:SPIP and Wikipedia:RESUME to find out more about Wikipedia's policy on this sort of article. Marrante (talk) 17:43, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- I agree. CEO's of companies are not always notable, and VPs almost never are (on the basis of position). Meeting Notability standards with reliable sources is important. I confess I looked quickly, but I didn't see any evidence of a source sufficient to establish notability.--SPhilbrickT 17:50, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Ok fine but pls dont go tag the article just yet..lets bring this concerns up on the talk page first ...see if your concerns can be satisfied...We cant keep deleting every new article form new editors..we will keep losing them ...! no speed delete needed i think ..if you like a vote perhaps ..Buzzzsherman (talk) 17:56, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- It would help if new editors would create new articles in user space, then we wouldn't have to worry about the possibility of over-zealous deletion. In fact, if Holly would consent, this could be moved to user space, and cleaned up at a leisurely pace. Otherwise, it should meet out requirement and it decidedly doesn't. I did a quick search myself to see if I could find something notable about her, but failed. Doesn't mean it isn't there, but it is more work than just a simple search and add references.--SPhilbrickT 18:48, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Ok fine but pls dont go tag the article just yet..lets bring this concerns up on the talk page first ...see if your concerns can be satisfied...We cant keep deleting every new article form new editors..we will keep losing them ...! no speed delete needed i think ..if you like a vote perhaps ..Buzzzsherman (talk) 17:56, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Well i like you Sphilbrick...great idea lets PM her and make this suggestion...if only everyone was like you and thinking of the new editors feelings ..no way a new editor will ever know all the 5000 guidelines... !hug Sphilbrick...Buzzzsherman (talk) 19:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- I agree. CEO's of companies are not always notable, and VPs almost never are (on the basis of position). Meeting Notability standards with reliable sources is important. I confess I looked quickly, but I didn't see any evidence of a source sufficient to establish notability.--SPhilbrickT 17:50, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
vegetable monsters
vegetable monsters Please give me all the feedback possible - and any comments you may have on content and/or style. Rdeastis (talk) 19:20, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- This page needs a lot of work, and may not meet the criteria for inclusion at all. The article applies the term to all plants of the genus Monstera, whereas there is no reference to indicate that this term is in general use for this genus of plants. The term is attributed to Erasmus Darwin who does, indeed, use the term in his Botanic Garden..., but no to refer to Monstera species specifically, but to any plant which meets his definition (i.e. plants with double flowers). The etymology of the term "monster" is also wrong: monstrum is no "that which teaches" but rather "that which warns" (monere = to warn). (See the etymology of monster at M-W.com.) If the article is allowed to remain, the references must be rewritten to be inline references, so the facts and the references which verify them can be linked. WikiDan61ChatMe!ReadMe!! 19:41, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
Systemic bias
Question unrelated to the purpose of this page
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I am a regular and prolific wikipedia editor. I have on-going problems with POV, incivility and "cabalism" by members of a particular wikiproject. The problem is this: there is a certain class of topics which are interdisciplinary (I will call the fields field A and field B), but the members of the project for field A demonstrate no respect for the contributions of editors in field B. The members of field A greatly outnumber the members of field B, and their attitude seems to be that these topics are solely within thier own province, and that field B is really just, sort of a pretender (as if they think B is like a hobby to them or something, when it actually is a more rigorous and comprehensive study than A is.) Great volumes of legitimate, academically supported, and unique contributions have been deleted. Some of it wholesale, and some of it is the long term, peacemeal activity. Some of it is by a few dedicated editors, and some of it is by one-timers, and newbies. The problem seems to be a pervasive attitude within the field A. I have several questions, but my primary one is this: beyond the mediation services provided in WP, is there some judicial check? If I disagree with a mediated resolution, is there some duly appointed judicial body which is authoritative? My problem is that the "wikipedia consensus" obviously fails in situations like these. Is a mediation committee able to see beyond the rancor of a large group that wrongly sees contributions from field B as "POV pushing" when the reality is that academics from field B actually produce legitimate subject matter. It seems that the problem is respecting legitimate interdisciplinary contributions.Anon12e456 (talk) 19:52, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
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List of Academy Award Winning Families
User:Klantry01/List of Academy Award Winning Families
List of Academy Award winners related to other winners, subdivided into Extended Families, Siblings, and Couples. Started it after moviemom posted trivia that there was only one 3-generation winning family (The Huston's), when in fact there are two others (The Coppola's and the Farrow/Previn/Allen's), and I couldn't find a reference.
Main concern: I can't say for sure I've done the full geneology on every oscar winner. There may be an ex-spouse, in-law, or cousin I've missed. How should I reflect that?
Klantry01 (talk) 21:40, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
p.s. Open to input on an alternate title. Current one, strictly interpreted, could be "the families of anyone who has won an award." List of Multiple Academy Award Winning Families is similarly ambiguous. List of Academy Award Winners Related to Other Winners is clunky. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Klantry01 (talk • contribs) 13:33, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
Environmental Law in India: Judicial Activism, Public Interest Litigation and Green Benches
Can someone please help me with formatting and with general comments on this article about environmental law in india Thank you --Ahhjean33 (talk) 23:25, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Here is a link to the article User:Ahhjean33/new article name here ~~ GB fan ~~ talk 23:30, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
- Quite good. Some formatting issues:
- Wikipedia generally puts reference citations after punctuation, in particular just after the period that closes a sentence.
- Wikipedia generally uses "logical quotation" meaning that punctuation is palced inside quote markss only if it was part of the original quotation.
- Wikipeida normally uses "straight quotes", not "curly" or "angled" quotes in which the opening quote is different from the closing quote.
- The use of named references (see Help:Footnotes and citing sources allows multiple references to the same paper or source to go to a single footnote, which improves consistence. I have made this change in one case, as an example.
- When a source is cited as a specific reference to a specific statment, it is redundant to include it also as a "general reference" -- that is, to list it in the references section without being attached to a specific citation. Some such sources might be listed in a "Further reading" section.
- You might want to consider the list defined reference format, which separates the detailed reference metadata from the body text. It does have the disadvantage of requiring two edits to add a reference if section editing is being used.
- There needed to be more wiki-links to other wikipedia articles, I have added several.
- I personally recommend the use of citation templates, but this is not required. I have converted the first two references as an example. The reference toolbar gadget (found in the gadgets tab of the preferences dialog) makes adding such references easier, but sometiems manual editing is still needed, as not all options are supported by this gadget.
- I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 07:12, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- Quite good. Some formatting issues:
Dora Levy Mossanen
User:Pieraklein/Dora Levy Mossanen
I would like help adding content to this page. There is already a reference to one of the author's books on wikipedia under Harem and then the Fiction Section. I would like to link these pages.
Also this author is a regular contributor to the Huffington Post, has been featured in various media: radio (NPR - National Public Radio: The Politics of Culture), tv, blogs, papers, etc. and has her book translated into more than 10 different languages.
I am still learning how to add content... Any additions are welcome, and notes, or comments.
Best, Pieraklein (talk) 00:12, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- Nice work. I can't see any immediate issues, but it would suggest some minor adjustments such as adding categories and expanding the scope of the topic. -Reconsider! 08:37, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
Dietary Supplements
User:Healthycare/L-arginine_ethyl_ester
User:Healthycare/Calcium beta-hydroxy-beta-methylbutyrate
User:Healthycare/Guanidinopropionic Acid
I would like to know your opinion on these 3 articles and if they are ready to be moved to the main space. Thank you. J.D. (talk) 13:10, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- Regarding User:Healthycare/L-arginine_ethyl_ester
- Looks pretty good.
- I didn't like this sentence, L-arginine ethyl ester represents a white powder quickly soluble in hot water in particular, represents. I'm not coming up with a good alternative, but there must be a better way to say this.
- The chemical diagram doesn't show up very well. It would look better as an SVG (see Lysine as an example).
- If you don't know how to create an SVG, you can put in a request at this place, and someone may convert it for you.
- Please add some categories. See WP:CAT if you don't know what this means. See Leucine for examples.--SPhilbrickT 18:51, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- Regarding User:Healthycare/Calcium beta-hydroxy-beta-methylbutyrate:
- As above, I don't like the word represents. I also don't like criticising without an alternative, but I haven't come up with a good alternative.
- In Physical & Chemical Properties, this sentence Also small amount of heavy metals is allowed (lead NMT 1 ppm and arsenic NMT 1 ppm) is not very encyclopedic. I'm not quite sure how to rephrase it - possibly and may contains trace amounts of heavy metals such as lead and arsenic or just remove it.
- I don't like the opening sentence in Side effects, which currently reads No side effects were observed during the intake of calcium ?-HMB, though you should always make sure to keep to the prescriptions.. Either remove, or figure out how to fold it into the subsequent sentences, if it arises from the same referenced study.
- As above, the chemical diagram would look better if it were an SVG, although this one is not as hard to read.
- Please add some categories. See WP:CAT if you don't know what this means. See Leucine for examples.--SPhilbrickT 22:23, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
William R. Hawkins
I request feedback on William R. Hawkins The item is biographical note on a conservative writer. Eamonn FingletonEfingleton (talk) 14:29, 19 February 2010 (UTC) (I removed some redundant sections and entries)--SPhilbrickT 18:32, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- I suspect he meets the Notability requirement, but you haven't established that. While you do have some references, I didn't see any that meet the reliable source standard. While the existing references are fine to support the points they are used to support, I didn't see any that help establish his notability. According to his bio, he "has published over 140 articles". Surely some can be linked, but the key is to find some coverage of him in newspapers and other reliable sources.
- Assuming you can find those, check out Article Layout to see how an article should be organized, specifically the creation of a WP:LEAD.
- Sorry, sounds like a fair amount of work, but Biographies of living persons are help to a high standard.--SPhilbrickT 23:28, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
metroMAGAZINE
user:spiritofomaha/metroMAGAZINE is about a company in Omaha that does monthly magazine publications. Im asking for feedback on this article. SpiritofOmaha.com (talk) 15:42, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- This sounds like an advertisement and lacks a neutral point of view, and I wonder what your relationship with this magazine is given your user name. I also don't know if this magazine is notable. I googled briefly and can't find any reliable 2nd or 3rd party sources that discuss this magazine. Nuujinn (talk) 00:44, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Rapper Fat Tone
(FAT TONE User:Originalrecordz/Fat-Tone)
17:48, 27 January 2010 (UTC)BiggKhrisco (talk)
(I removed some redundant sections and entries)--SPhilbrickT 18:30, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
International media reaction to Barack Obama's election
I would like to invite feedback on this draft article on the international media reaction to Barack Obama's 2008 election. Please note that images are available to improve the article's look and will be added once the page is published. Please leave comments on the draft's discussion page. Thank you! --Amandaroyal (talk) 19:06, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
User:BufordWrite/Battersea_(Petersburg,_VA)
Hello -
I've created a new page for a historically significant property in Petersburg, VA. I did use the Article Wizard and have tried to include as much info, sources and other details as I can. Any comments or feedback is appreciated as this is my first wiki article. Thanks!!
BufordWrite (talk) 19:37, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- Well, number one, you need to link those references to the actual points in the text of your article. You've got quite a few references there and my brief glance says this is probably okay as a subject matter and the writing looks (from the little I read) to be appropriate. But you need to fix those reference links and check out your categories too. They're all the wrong color. I think it's probably a capitalization problem. Happens to me too -- I'm new, as well. But you look to be off to a good start! In future, it's helpful to put a link to the article in the request itself, too. The title of the request (which becomes a section header) is not linked, so you have to repeat it in the request again, this time, wikilinked. Hope this helps! Marrante (talk) 17:56, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Specifically, check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.--SPhilbrickT 02:08, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
User:UAB Wiki/Underwater Archaeology Branch, Naval History & Heritage Command
I have undertaken my first wikipedia page to draw attention to a very interesting branch of the NHHC which does not get recognized, although there are numerous mentions of UAB in H.L. Hunley and CSS Alabama. I feel confident my page is well written, but I am having a hard time knowing whether I have the necessary references to be considered encyclopedic. Any feed back would be most welcome. User:UAB Wiki/Underwater Archaeology Branch, Naval History & Heritage Command
UAB Wiki (talk) 21:24, 19 February 2010 (UTC)Leachers, 19 February 2010
- Decent start, fair amount of interesting information, however, you need some work on references. I assume some of the material came from here, but you need to identify the source of each fact. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.
- I also suspect that there are dedicated editors at this task force page who may be interested in providing specific help. Just contact one or more at their talk page.--SPhilbrickT 02:05, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Bungaroosh
I've just written a draft of my first article, User:Shermarama/Bungaroosh, and I'd appreciate some feedback. It's heavily based on one source, which reflects my experience of this peculiar building material very well. Other sources are proving difficult to find, because it's a really specifically regional building material only found in the Brighton area - its obscurity, the fact that most people don't know what sort of mess they've bought, is part of its notability. But does it sound sufficiently notable for wikipedia? Worth carrying on trying to find other references? --Shermarama (talk) 22:03, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- I'm not _sure_ if it's notable, given it's limited usage--but then Clutch is just about as notable. It sounds like an interesting topic tho, and there are a lot of different building materials up here. I did find a couple of references:
- http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1P2-5278654.html
- http://www.buildingopinions.com/Archive/S/stamford.html
- Also see http://www.urbanwords.info/supplement.php?initial=B, there's reference to Rob Fraser in regard to Bungaroosh, you might see if you can track that down.
- Nuujinn (talk) 01:35, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the feedback. The Rob Fraser article (the one referred to on urbanwords is the same single reference I've got) seems to be the only source article anywhere - would adding other references that mention bungaroosh, rather than being about it, help establish its notability? --Shermarama (talk) 19:29, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- It depends on the nature of the source. What you really want are books or newspaper articles, but if you find a reference to a particular aspect of the topic, other sources might work. If you're local to the area, you might contact newspapers or libraries to see if they have any references.
- Take a look at this:
- I think that's a good source, since it's from a reliable newspaper and references a public program designed to cope with the problems related to the building material. Nuujinn (talk) 20:06, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the feedback. The Rob Fraser article (the one referred to on urbanwords is the same single reference I've got) seems to be the only source article anywhere - would adding other references that mention bungaroosh, rather than being about it, help establish its notability? --Shermarama (talk) 19:29, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Unknown Sailor of Hindhead, Surrey, England
Feedback on....
Unknown Sailor please
BTP51 (talk) 22:13, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
Gifted Education Resource Institute
This article outlines Purdue University's gifted education programs through a division called Gifted Education Resource Institute. The founder, John Feldheusen is one of the premier names in gifted education and does not yet have a page but I am working on that as well. This can fit in nicely with the other Purdue and College of Education pages and could be a great resource for people in the midwest that are interested in GT.
Geri Purdue (talk) 22:49, 19 February 2010 (UTC)
- See Wikipedia:Miscellany for deletion/User:Geri Purdue/Gifted Education Resource Institute DES (talk) 06:38, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
General Paul Johnson
I wrote an article on General Paul Johnson, and I'm looking for some feedback. I found a few sources, and he meets the guidelines for notability, but I haven't found much on his actual career. I'm hoping someone could help with that. Rin tin tin 1996 (talk) 15:32, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- It definitely needs a fair amount of work. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes to see how to add references. (While you listed two external sites that should qualify as references, you didn't include the footnotes to identify the source of information.)
- This page is for general help, I suggest that you talk to someone with experience regarding military biographies, as there is a style and format desired for those biographies, and those involved in the project are likely to be interested in helping and know how to find additional sources to help you.
- Check out Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/United States military history task force, in general. Note the list of members, along with their areas of interest/expertise. For example, User:Colgator lists US Air Force. Consider leaving a note at the talk page of one or more of the project, and I'll bet they'll be willing to help. If you don't know how to leave a message at a Talk page, click on the word "talk" after their name, then click on "new Section" at the top of the page, and ask them to contact you. They'll respond at your talk page.--SPhilbrickT 01:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Hi folks,
Please provide some feedback on the new page. I'm especially interested in informed or expert opinion from those with a knowledge of early modern literature and theology, if we have such experts on board. Thanks!--BenJonson (talk) 16:56, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- I posted a request here
- You are encouraged to contact Ret.Prof yourself, he promises not to bite.--SPhilbrickT 22:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Inclusion in New Jersey page
Is there a way to include magazines in the New Jersey page? I'd like to include New Jersey Business magazine, the oldest business magazine in New Jersey. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Vinlynne (talk • contribs) 17:17, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- There is a section on media, but it isn't perfectly clear where it belongs. I suggest you think about where it belongs (perhaps changing Newspapers to Newspapers and Magazines, but post your proposal at the Talk Page, in case someone has a better idea. If there are no objections or better ideas, go for it.--SPhilbrickT 22:00, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
Anthony Lombardi
Arlombardi (talk) 19:03, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Well, your userid id suggests you may not be able to maintain a neutral point of view, and the article reads like an advertisement. Until the TV episode is shown, I'm not sure this Antony Lombardi is notable, and I think the article also needs additional reliable sources to establish notability. Nuujinn (talk) 20:13, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- Please read WP:COI. While it may seem odd that you would be discouraged from contributing to an article when you probably know more than any other editor, it actually makes sense in the context of the Wikipedia goals. All is not lost, though, if someone else creates an article, you are permitted, even encouraged, to post information to the related Talk Page, suggesting corrections, addition, or relevant sources, but other, uninvolved editors should make the changes.--SPhilbrickT 22:07, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
TARGIT, a novel technique for delivering radiotherapy in the operating theatre.
I've drafted a page on this in my userspace: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Norman21/TARGIT Please have a look and let me have your comments before I move it into mainspace. Thanks. Norman21 (talk) 19:41, 20 February 2010 (UTC)
- I would recommend reviewing our guideline on citing sources, and specifically i would suggest the use of {{Cite journal}}. Specifically, it is not helpful to use abbreviated names of journals on Wikipedia, no matter how common that may be in other publications. Providing a link to an online version of a cited source is very helpful when possible. If the journal has an article on Wikipedia, wiki-linking the name of the journal in the citation can be helpful, but is not required.
- Normally I would be inclined to doubt that an experimental technique not yet in general use was notable, but there does seem to be several reliable sources here. Are there any sources that are independent of the group that developed this technique? If not the articel might seem a bit promotional.
- There needs to be a clearer explanation for non-technical readers what this technique is, what it does, how it is an improvement on other techniques, and how it fits into a larger context.
- Overall this is an excellent start, IMO. DES (talk) 06:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Battle of the Argesul
I was just wondering if this is ready for launch, so if any comments are available, either voice them here or update the article itself at User:Buggie111/Battle of the Argesul. Pretty fun working on it. Buggie111 (talk) 00:50, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- It would be helpful to explain what is notable about this battle. I don't know enough about the rules for military notability; if all battles are deemed notable, then this will qualify, but even if true, it would be helpful to explain what is special about this battle - was it important to either side in any particular way?
- You have a couple references, but the citation style could be improved. Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for help.
- You might check in on this task force page. There are editors hanging out there who may be able to give you more specific feedback.--SPhilbrickT 02:53, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Last year, I did substantial work on this article over a period of several weeks. I then submitted it for a Good Article nomination, which it failed. I now know that this was indeed not a "good article". I have been a little busy lately, but yesterday and today I have managed to fix many of the problems the GA reviewer said were wrong with the article and am basically if I get a good response here, I will submit it for a peer-review and eventually good article status. If you look at the article's history you will see that this article was a mess before I began editing it last year.BillyJack193 (talk) 06:00, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- Been waiting since last night. I actually expected this to take longer, but please look at articles that have been posted first. Most of what has been posted under me has received comment. And check this out for the version of the article directly before I made my first edit in April of last year. [5].BillyJack193 (talk) 22:13, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- I've looked at the article (it looks good), but I've been mulling over how to respond. I created a few articles, and edited many, but have not gone through the GAN process, so I'm not up to speed on the fine points of what is acceptable and what is not. Frankly, this page is more focused on very new editors (mostly because article wizard creations are directed here. I won't speak for the others who stick their nose in on occasion and respond, but I think most are expecting to help with more basic needs such as adding references. I checked out Wikipedia:Good articles to see if they have a process, but it appears (after a quick read) that you get feedback by submitting it. I gather you are trying to get informal feedback to decide whether you are ready to submit a formal request.
- In short, I don't have the requisite experience to help. My suggestion is to visit Wikipedia:Good articles, pick out a couple editors who seem like regulars, and ask them for an informal review. Or you can wait here, and maybe someone will come along and offer thoughts, but requests such as yours are rare (I can't recall any) so it might not happen. Wish I could give you a better answer.--SPhilbrickT 23:48, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you.BillyJack193 (talk) 00:23, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- I'll try to do a copyedit soon. For the moment I've done a massive references overhaul, fixing the dates for everything, adding isbns, changing citation templates to specific (everything was cited using cite journal) etc.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 13:35, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Mark W. Moffett New page to post
I would like to post a new page about the Sociobiologist/National Geographic Top Photograher/Ant expert/etc. Mark Moffett. Below is the draft of the article. I hope that someone will offer feedback before I post it. Thanks. Never did this before. -Roc Ordman
Mark W. Moffett, Ph.D. “Mark has developed a career that combines science and photography, in spite of being a high school dropout. Although his family was not academic, encouraged by his parents he sought out biologists by the age of 12. “ [1] Moffett received his BA in Biology at Beloit College in Wisconsin in 1979. He received his PhD from Harvard University where he studied with E. O. Wilson, who developed the field of sociobiology. Mark was the first PhD candidate that Wilson had accepted in about a decade, but Mark was so fascinated by ant behavior that Wilson agreed to accept him as a student. Moffett taught himself novel photographic techniques for his 1989 Ph.D. on ants. National Geographic magazine published these novel photographs. Moffett went on to be the curator of ants at Harvard, and then to direct Harvard's Museum of Comparative Zoology. His research concerns insect social behavior and the structure and dynamics of forest ecosystems, particularly their canopies. He travels the world studying different insects and ecosystems. He has investigated canopies of the Amazon rain forest, where he operates a research station in Peru. He also has worked on the supertall coniferous forests of the Pacific Northwest, for which he led the first ever ascent and study of the world's tallest tree, known as the National Geographic redwood. In 1993 Harvard University Press published Moffett's book, The High Frontier: Exploring the Tropical Rainforest Canopy. He has a new book coming out in early 2010. Today his research and National Geographic photography are interspersed with writing and public lecturing about rain forests. In 2010, he is Research Associate, NMNH, the Smithsonian Institution, Associate Curator, the University of California, Berkeley, and Contract Photographer, National Geographic Magazine. He also operates a research station in the Amazon Rainforest in Peru along the Amazon River. A photomural he produced there can be seen at Olbrich Botanical Gardens in Madison, WI.
A web search of his name reveals a host of books, photos, articles, prizes, TV appearances, and other achievements of this remarkable explorer who began with a devotion to learning.
[1] Top photographer for National Geographic
- First of all, let me welcome you here.
- I think what you may want to do to get started is use the new article wizard to walk you through creation of this article. This page is not intended for posting of drafts--rather, you should create an article in your user space or elsewhere and then post a request for feedback here. That being said, this is a nice start--the prose is somewhat rough, but that's not unusual for a draft. What you really need, though, are some verifiable and reliable sources to help you establish Moffett as a notable person, such as newspaper or magazine articles. It's not really sufficient to say that a web search will reveal these, what you need to do is put citations within the article. Nuujinn (talk) 15:34, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
User:Mitchmarx1/Grad_Associates
User:Mitchmarx1/Grad_Associates Mitchmarx1 (talk) 16:06, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- Not bad as a start, but additional references are needed to establish notability. One source that is a 4-paragraph story is not really enough. Also, there should be more about what this firm actually did -- mentions of notable buildings or projects on which they worked for example, or innovations that they introduced. None of that should be overly hard to add, i would hope. DES (talk) 16:32, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
TuneVibez
Link: User:Charliebobgordon/TuneVibez Charliebobgordon (talk) 16:16, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- This needs more citations, particularly to independent reliable sources, both to support the facts stated, and to establish notability. Your current citations are to "The Year's Best Small Business on Twitter" which seems to be a user-voted award award thus not a reliable source at all. Your further reading section currently lists writings by two people involved with this project, which are therefore not independent, and a you-tube link which is highly unlikely to be considered a reliable source --youtube almost never is. The external links are no better: sites by involved people, blogs, twitter, youtube, facebook and a forum. Not a reliable source in the lot, by Wikipedia standards. You need independent, published comment. I advise that you consult WP:CITE, WP:RS, and WP:WEB. Mind you, with better sources, this isn't a bad start on an article. The main issue is establishing notability. I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 17:01, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- I'll add that this all seems to be an advertisement. I see that you are a new member of wikipedia, but you might read up on Wikipedia and conflict of interest. From your userid and the TuneVibez web site, can I assume that you are the DJ and webmaster for TuneVibez? If so, I congratulate you on the effort that you and your friends are putting into this endeavor, but wikipedia is not an appropropriate place to promote your business. I agree with DES that the article is pretty good, but you will definitely need better sources. Nuujinn (talk) 17:11, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Vukovi Beograd
Vukovi Beograd article Vukovi_Beograd --Alexbgd83 (talk) 20:07, 21 February 2010 (UTC)Aleksandar Andjelkovic 21.2.2010
- Ir looks very good and is well--written, subject seems notable enough. However, there are no inline citations. I'm sure that since you were able to write such a good article on the subject, you got your information from somewhere. Simply credit your sources. Hope this helps.BillyJack193 (talk) 21:55, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- References can be tricky, but check out WP:CITE and footnotes, which should help you. Come back if it isn't clear, and we can provide an example.--SPhilbrickT 22:20, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
Mehgan Heaney-Grier
The name of the article is Mehgan Heaney-Grier. The wikilink is Mehgan Heaney-Grier or [[6]] - (not sure which link will work).
I authored and posted this article for wikipedia. It is about freediver Mehgan Heaney-Grier who, in 1996, established the first-ever freedive record for both men and women in the United States. Additionally, she is an actress, model and has hosted, been featured in and produced many television shows.
This article was done in conjunction with Mehgan for fact verification and with her permission. She has also given permission (in writing) to Wikipedia to use the images that are included in the article and on/in Wikipedia Commons.
Lastly, I saw the clean up tag requesting fewer photos in the article - thus we removed two of them.
Please give us any other feedback that might help us better the article.
Thank you, Petey Jones and Mehgan Heaney-Grier 2/21/2010 Mhg165 (talk) 21:50, 21 February 2010 (UTC)
- I don't think this is too bad, but it comes off as promotional, and although she's clearly notable, the article needs additional 2nd and 3rd parties references. I don't think it quite reaches neutral point of view. The lede says she's a naturalist, and I see that she's working towards graduation, but the article would be better if it listed her work in this area beyond hosting tv shows and giving talks, especially if she has any publications. The http://sanctuaries.noaa.gov/news/features/0107_ecocenter.html link doesn't mention her, so I think it may not be relevent. As for the pics, I think the face shot and the shot of her deep diving are the only pics you need for this purpose. She's an attractive women, but my thought is that a picture should add to the content in a substantial way. The mermaid shot isn't explained--I'm guessing she worked with Weeki Wachee, if so, why not mention that? Also, I'd suggest dropping the last two external links--linking to her facebook and youtube pages suggest the purpose of the article is promotional in nature. Nuujinn (talk) 00:26, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
The Prometheus Institute
Dlasker88 (talk) 00:11, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- not a bad start. It needs more details if possible, and more references, particularly from news sources, if possible. References should not be just bare links, but should include such metadata as the name of the work, the title of the articel or story or web page, the date of publication, the author when known, etc. If the reference is a bare link, all data can be lsot if the link goes bad, and a user looking at the list of references needs to follow each one to see what sort of sources are being used. I recommend the use of the citation templates, although this is not required.
- I have adjusted most, but not all, of the references to use citation templates.
Oh the last reference, the one to http://www.statehousecall.org/ doesn't seem top mention the subject at all. Perhaps the story is now in the archives?- my error, the site is run by the organization.
- Nice work so far. I hope this is helpful. DES (talk) 02:42, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
hello design
Helloscott99 (talk) 00:27, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- A bit on the dubious side for notability as it stands. Many of the references appear to be to passing mentions of the firm, not significant coverage, and several seem to be to blogs or other sources that are not reliable sources. The articel needs to expand on why the firm is different from the run of the mill design agency, or why it is significant and important, adn it needs more substantial independent coverage. Still it could be worse for a start. DES (talk) 21:15, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
User:HealthGal/Tracey_Powell
This is an article about Tracey Powell, a healthcare entrepreneur who is highly-recognized in the industry as having produced the first and only FDA-approved at-home kits for anonymous HIV and Hepatitis-C testing. By de-stigmatizing STD testing and providing an online, confidential forum for risk evaluation and expert test recommendations, he has enabled thousands who otherwise would not have sought out such information to receive anonymous STD testing, and subsequent treatment as applicable.
HealthGal (talk) 01:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Sun Yat-sen's prayer at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor
Hi
This is my first article (lot of fun). In fact I have never edited a page either. I was going through the page on Sun Yat-sen trying to find out about this prayer that he made at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor. I had seen a reference to the fact that Sun Yat-sen had visited and prayed at the tomb three days after he took power in a book on the Forbidden city. I got very curious as to why he, who had been trying to overthrow the Qing dynasty, would visit the tomb of the founder of the Ming dynasty. In any case one thing led to another and I managed to find the original prayer mentioned in a book published in 1912.
I would like to add a reference to this prayer in Sun Yat-sen's original article and as such would like to add the prayer itself as an article which can be then be linked.
User:MalikFeb2010/Sun Yat-sen's prayer at the tomb of the Hongwu Emperor
MalikFeb2010 (talk) 04:49, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- For starters, welcome to Wikipedia. Please continue to edit here. Looking at the article on Sun Yat-Sen, I see no reason for this to be a separate article. But it is very well written and sourced and probably belongs within the article if it is indeed notable enough. Unfortunately, I do not know enough about his life to tell you if it is notable or not, but regardless, it does not need its own article.BillyJack193 (talk) 04:58, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the quick feedback. I think this was a very graceful tribute by Sun Yat-sen to the Ming Emperor and as such should be part of the page on him - also points to the centuries long conflicts that have taken place between the Chinese Han race and the Eastern and Western Tartars. I presume (not sure how it gets determined if it is notable enough or not) that it will be okay for me to go ahead and figure out the appropriate place and add it into the original Sun Yat-sen article.MalikFeb2010 (talk) 05:43, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- From what you have said, it is notable enough, so go ahead and add it. If you put it in the wrong place, I am sure some of the other editors of the article will help you out. Good luck.BillyJack193 (talk) 06:04, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- I am going to have to disagree with the above comments. The place for the complete text of the prayer is Wikisource - the text can be posted there and linked to in the main article. Large chunks of source material like this should not be added to a Wikipedia article. – ukexpat (talk) 20:40, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- I have no problem putting it in Wikisource. However can you point out which category you think is appropriate? Please do consider that this is not a "religious prayer" in the strictest sense of the word. I checked Wikisource and am not sure where you would like to see it placed. Any recommendations? MalikFeb2010 (talk) 03:43, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
Miaohui
Literally Temple Fair, this is a festivity common in China during the Chinese New Year. A lot of materials are already present on Chinese WP. I wonder if anyone wants to have a look and make some translations if possible. It is amazing that no article exists yet about this tradition.Btmachine333667 (talk) 09:52, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Johnnie Bassett
I created a new article, which was nominated for speedy deletion under section G12. Eventually I had the item returned to my user page, here - User:Derek R Bullamore/Johnnie Bassett. I have had several trial attempts at re-writing it, but always seem to end up back in the same place. Correspondence on my user talk page, here - User talk:Derek R Bullamore, may give you more background. Basically I am stuck, and would much appreciate another pair of eyes to try to knock this into shape. Please do feel free to sub-edit the 'draft' article itself, if this is easier for you. Maybe it is me that needs knocking into shape, not the article ! Many thanks,
Derek R Bullamore (talk) 14:39, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Council of Residential Specialists
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Council_of_Residential_Specialists I have created an article about the largest subsidiary for the national association of realtors. They are a non for profit council that has several different functions in the real estate market. Thank you for your time!
216.21.37.146 (talk) 15:08, 22 February 2010 (UTC)Rob Kairis 02/22/10
- There are a number of problems
- All of the references are bare hyperlinks, and need to be converted to include the relevant metadata, either manually or by use of citation templates, I would favor the latter. See WP:CITE and Help:footnotes for more details.
- Most of the citations are to parts of the organization's own web site, or to press relatives or directory entries. Few are to independent reliable sources, and more such are needed. As it stands the citations do not establish notability, see our guideline on notability of organizations.
- The article violated our style guideline on trademarks which advises "Follow standard English text formatting and capitalization rules even if the trademark owner considers nonstandard formatting 'official'" and "Do not use the ™ and ® symbols, or similar, in either article text or citations, unless unavoidably necessary for context". I have fixed this issue, buyt please note it for the future.
- The article is written in a rather promotional tone. Phrases like "seeking the knowledge, tools and relationship-building opportunities needed to maximize their income and professionalism in residential real estate." are marketing-speak.
- The "Mission Statement and Objectives" are apparently direct quotes, but are not formatted or explicitly attributed as such.
- I hope these notes are helpful. DES (talk) 20:39, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Alpha, Washington
Sorry if I'm asking for feedback too often, but I would like to know what is left before I launch User:Buggie111/Alpha, Washington. I've nearly knocked myself insane finding info about this, and I'd like to move it to it's namespace home as part of my unannounced de-redlink the Lewis County, washington tempalte campaign. Constructive critiscisim would be appreciated.
Buggie111 (talk) 17:09, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- I've done a revamping of the references and formatting. It could certainly use some more detailed information and sources, though my searches turned up nothing.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 18:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Well, I could not find anything else in searches, and I do not want to pay for a flight to Seattle to reasearch. I'd say that this is as far as I could go. Buggie111 (talk) 19:24, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Visionlearning.com
I just created the article Visionlearning.com User:Neopropism/Visionlearning.com and would love some feedback on the tone, etc. I've tried to be as unbiased as possible, but am not sure if some of my descriptions seem too favorable.
Thanks! Neopropism (talk) 17:22, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Wendy K. Wilkins
Hello,
I am looking for feedback on my first Wikipedia article on Wendy K. Wilkins. I know the Wikilink will not work, so here is the link to the page itself: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CLEARllh/Wendy_Wilkins
Does anybody know how I can change the Wikilink so it links correctly? There is already an article on Wendy Wilkins, but not the one this article is about, so I've changed my article to Wendy K. Wilkins, but only in title. How do I change it so that when you search for Wendy K. Wilkins it comes up with my article?
I have a request out to Ms. Wilkins for her birthdate and as soon as I hear back I will change the dummy text in my article to that date. I am working on uploading a photo of her for the article, but doing everything on here for the first time seems a little overwhelming and confusing at best. I'm working on it, though! Any feedback would be greatly appreciated. CLEARllh (talk) 17:41, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- Hi CLEARllh,
- You can link to the article in its current location using User:CLEARllh/Wendy Wilkins. To move an article, you can click on the move tab at the top of the page.
- I think your page should be the Wendy Wilkins page, since it refers to a real person, but perhaps that is an issue best left for another day. Your article seems pretty well referenced and ready to move to article space so if I were you I would click on the move tab and where it says "User:CLEARllh/Wendy Wilkins" change it to say "Wendy K. Wilkins". On the Wendy Wilkins page, you will need to add a disambiguation hatnote pointing to your article. If you are not sure how to do that I can help.
- In terms of the actual article, it doesn't have to have the date of birth so I would remove the place holder. It is generally well researched. My main concern is that a lot of it is just a big list, which isn't really the style you would expect from a biography article. Perhaps it should be cut down to the more interesting things. Maybe other editors have some suggestions.
- I don't think you have violated WP:BLP. I'm no expert on this, but I think a "Provost and Vice President for Academic Affairs" meets WP:Notability (academics) but it might be a good idea to find a reliable independent source that talks about her so that your article meets the standard of WP:GNG. What counts as an independent source is a contentious issue in Wikipedia, but I would suggest that it shouldn't come from either her or the University of North Texas.
- I hope that is helpful.
- Yaris678 (talk) 18:48, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
treezy musician
please dont delete my page —Preceding unsigned comment added by Money561 (talk • contribs) 20:29, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- It has been deleted. Please a look at WP:MUSICBIO for the notability guidelines for music people. It would appear that the subject is not notable per these guidelines. – ukexpat (talk) 20:34, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
Hello Design
This is an article about design agency Hello Design, in California. Please review this article.
Helloscott99 (talk) 20:32, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- See comments at #hello design, above. DES (talk) 21:20, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
David Newman aka Durga Das (Chant Artist)
Hello,
I posted an article about musician David Newman a few months ago in my userspace. At that time I was advised to wait until his next album came out on the Nettwerk label since he would then meet notability requirements. That album is coming out in a few weeks so I've made a few edits and would like to get the ball rolling again. If anyone has any input, thanks in advance!
Here is the article: David Newman aka Durga Das (Chant Artist)
AmaruKR (talk) 23:07, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- Having an interest in the world of chant generally, I read through the proposed article and checked for Newman and Durga Das on line. The text of the article is pretty much all based on personal websites and social media. I was unable to find a third-party source beyong the one Yoga magazine and it seems to be more pr than anything else. Until there are reviews of the albums or the studio in WP:RS, which might occur after the new album which is still in the porudction process, this appears to be a local musician/entrepreneur looking for WP publicity. I would say certainly not yet; the subject needs to have more more prominence than he has right now. If you have a careful read through Wikipedia's guidelines for notability in musicians, you will see that this individual meets none of the tests as far as I can tell. Bielle (talk) 23:22, 22 February 2010 (UTC)
- Hi Bielle,
- Thank you for taking a look and for your feedback.
- One of the guidelines for notability is "Has released two or more albums on a major label or one of the more important indie labels (i.e., an independent label with a history of more than a few years and a roster of performers, many of which are notable)" which I believe is applicable here since Newman's new album is being released through Nutone/Nettwerk, as was his last. The latest album was produced by a Grammy-award winning producer, who is also listed on WP. In addition, though chant is certainly a niche genre that will never get mainstream air time, there are other kirtan artists on WP who are also now making music through Nettwork/Nutone.
- Would it help to have more review articles referenced for past albums? I did not do so since a lot of the information was repeat or strictly reviews of albums.
- A few more points that might help the case: Newman has been putting albums out since 2003. In 2004 his second album was reviewed on NPR. In 2008 he was mentioned in an article called "Yoga Rock Stars" in Yoga+Joyful Living Magazine.
- In any case thanks again for taking the time. I won't say the impetus for this article is devoid of promotional considerations but I have tried to make it objective and do want to respect the WP guidelines. I wouldn't submit an article if I didn't believe the person belonged here. However, if the consensus is to wait, I will.
- Best,
- AmaruKR (talk) 16:59, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
oscar's grind
Please review oscar's grind Goodgrant (talk) 00:22, 23 February 2010 (UTC)goodgrant
- I started a copyedit but then discovered that the page was a copyright violation of this website. Please see the message I left on your talk page.--Fuhghettaboutit (talk) 01:27, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
VertiKa
I started the page VertiKa and revised it after first review and seek another. --Ewikiwriter (talk) 13:07, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
Just read through your article, and I think it's pretty good. There's plenty of references and reliable sources in there, and the structure makes it really easy for me to read and find out the important information. However, I would say with the 'history' section that you could perhaps put the dates in bold and separate the sections a bit more. Apart from that, I think it's a really well written article! Please ask if you require any more opinions on the article. Chevymontecarlo (talk) 16:18, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA)
This is my first posting to Wikipedia and I'd appreciate your feedback. I've read the tutorial and many of the other help pages, so hopefully I've got it right.
A great deal of the reference material is personal knowledge, having been involved with the association for the past 14 years as Membership Chair and Secretary. I was involved in coordinating the 50th anniversary celebration and used some of the information gathered from members and former members for the historical data.
Please check out the Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA) Canadian Race Communications Association (CRCA) Wikipedia entry.
Thank you for your time,
Coolorie (talk) 16:29, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
- Your conflict of interest is obvious, and is reflected in the advertising-like, promotional nature of the current draft. --Orange Mike | Talk 20:33, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
Tera-play
Would appreciate feedback on a new article that I'm working on at User:JessicaTLV/Tera-play. I'm a new editor, this is my first article, so I have done the tutorial and read numerous articles on how to write articles. I'd appreciate any help or advice on both improving my article and ensuring that it is not at risk for deletion. I've also created a talk-page for the draft at User_talk:JessicaTLV/Tera-play Thanks for your help! JessicaTLV (talk) 17:28, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
- Unfortunately, it is replete with problems.
- You probably see the banner noting it has no references, and you might think that it does, with two entries in the reference section. However, both are link within Wikipedia. Such links are highly encouraged, but not as references. References are always external to Wikipedia. It may seem odd, but Wikipedia does not qualify as a reliable source, Again, internal links are fine, but not in the form of references.
- You need to establish that the term "Tera-Play" is used by reliable sources. I did a quick search of news outlets here and came up with nothing. Doesn't mean there aren't any, but they need to be found.
- I agree with the banner noting is sounds like and advertisement. It isn't always easy to put a finger on exactly what that means, but phrases like "Tera-play is the next generation of connectivity" sounds more PR than encyclopedic.
- "corld" should be "world" (fixed)
- "Triple-play" shouldn't be Wikilinked, as it doesn't appear to be related to baseball. Perhaps you meant Triple play (telecommunications). (I'll fix it, as it is easier to fix than explain, but look at what I did, so you see how to do it.)
- Check out WP:CITE and footnotes for more help on referencing. --SPhilbrickT 23:01, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
Edgar Blazona Hello, I welcome all feedback on this new article I created. Please let me know where and how I can improve. Thanks! Taramelinchuk (talk) 18:09, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
WIkipedia on DJ Enuff
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dj_enuff Missgigi (talk) 22:29, 23 February 2010 (UTC) please let me know if this reads correctly and is properly done..want to avoid it getting deleted again —Preceding unsigned comment added by Missgigi (talk • contribs) 21:36, 23 February 2010 (UTC)
- You need to establish Notability with reliable sources. None of your references are formed properly, see WP:CITE and footnotes for help.
- The first item in your list of references is a bad link.
- I only looked at some of the entries in your reference section, I didn't see any that appeared to qualigy as reliable sources. --SPhilbrickT 00:50, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- You'll also want to check out Wikipedia:MUSIC, which lays out the specific criteria of notability for musicians.--SPhilbrickT 00:53, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Thank all issues have been corrected ie notability, links fixed and references. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Missgigi (talk • contribs) 01:48, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
[ACEC California] "ACEC California" Request for Feedback
[ACEC California]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ACEC_California
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As of February 2010 the membership includes nearly 1100 civil, structural, geotechnical, electrical and mechanical engineering and land surveying firms. The member firms provide services for all types of public works, residential, commercial and industrial projects. In November 2000 the California voters by a wide margin approved Proposition 35, a landmark measure sponsored by ACEC California. Prop 35 was endorsed by hundreds of organizations representing taxpayers, seniors, schools, local governments, business, labor, and engineers and almost unanimously by California’s newspapers. This measure authorized state and local governments to engage in public/private partnerships with qualified engineers like those represented by ACEC California to speed up the delivery of transportation, water, education, energy, housing and many other public works projects.[2][3] Since the passage of Prop 35 ACEC California continues to work with California officials to develop new, more ways to deliver vital new infrastructure quickly, efficiently and cost effectively. Members of the public can find California based engineering and surveying firms through an online, searchable database at www.acec-ca.org.
^ www.acec-ca.org/?pid+39 ^ www.smartvoter.org/2000/11/07/ca/state/prop35/ ^ www.fkassociates.com/prop35.html |
—Preceding unsigned comment added by AndrewNeilly (talk • contribs) 00:28, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- Your references are not properly formed, see WP:CITE and footnotes for help.
- You need to establish why this organization is notable. YOu can read Notability which will suggest finding references to the organization in reliable sources.
- Remember, the organization may seem obviously notable to you, but it isn't so obviously notable to others. Sometimes, similar sounding organizations might have very different levels of notability. You have to help us by showing that it is notable.--SPhilbrickT 01:04, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- Might need to take a look at WP:SPAM as well. -Reconsider! 01:21, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Tongal
This page provides information about the crowdsourcing advertising company Tongal. I'd appreciate any information that could help improve this page. Thanks for your time!
Fightonfortroy (talk) 04:30, 24 February 2010 (UTC)Fightonfortroy 02/23/2010
Rob Snyder (Robert Lloyd Snyder)
Rob Snyder (Robert Lloyd Snyder)
Biography of Rob Snyder.
Brendasimpler (talk) 14:15, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Mr Snyder is not really well known except for his leadership of Stream Energy - at least the article as it stands does not say anything else he is notable for. So instead of creating an article about him, you should add a paragraph on him to the Stream Energy article. This is common practice in business-related articles. I hope you are not part of any attempt to use the encyclopedia to promote the company. If you aren't, please accept my apologies. Itsmejudith (talk) 14:26, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Laimes
A new page on Laimes a venacular building type of Upper Silisia --AnnaSomerset (talk) 16:23, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- You mean Laimes (User:AnnaSomerset/Laimes), not Laimes. If your article turns out to be acceptable, we'll work out how to avoid the confusion, for example, the article you are working on might become Laimes(building).--SPhilbrickT 17:15, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Shallcross is a town in Derbyshire. Named after an ancient stone cross, it was once a stop on the Cromford and High Peak Railway line. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Bass500 (talk • contribs) 18:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- A good start. Spelling: scenery. Are you sure that the area was settled by Danes after the Norman Conquest? This point really needs a reference, anyway. You shouldn't reference Wikipedia in the way you do in your final reference. Your sources should be independent ones. Links to WP articles can go in the text as internal links, or at the end in a See also section. Itsmejudith (talk) 13:15, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Astro Solo
The Astro Solo is a new vehicle mentioned on several automotive blogs. I've put together some basic facts and a link to the company website.
Jwakeman (talk) 19:33, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
- Interesting. The pictures in the two references do not appear to be the same vehicle. One clearly shows solar cells, the other does not. The side panels are shaped differently. Any thoughts?--SPhilbrickT 20:56, 24 February 2010 (UTC)
Kathryn Wallace
Kathryn Wallace is an American film and print journalist. Please review and let me know if this person is notable enough and what else I might need to move to mainspace. Link to article is here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Joeistaller/Kathryn_Wallace
Joeistaller (talk) 01:06, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
- Not a bad start, although I would suggest a review of the external links and the in-text links. Also, the "Inside Guantanamo" section does not appear to be entirely relevant. -Reconsider! 01:32, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Glencadia
My town had a nice name, Glencadia. I wanted to set up a place to clear up why the word is floating around the area but is no longer the name of the town. Apologies if I did not follow all guidelines.˜˜˜˜ —Preceding unsigned comment added by Willpflaum (talk • contribs) 02:36, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
- You would need to add reliable sources to establish notability. I think a better solution would be to merge this info into Stuyvesant, New York and then redirect it there. If you do merge this info it will need to be established through reliable sources that Stuyvesant Falls was once called Glencadia because at this point the external links do not establish this. The article at this point does not even establish that this name is notable or that the hamlet of Stuyvesant Falls is notable. ~~ GB fan ~~ talk 02:50, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Create Synchronicity
Hello world!
I've just created the Create Synchronicity Wikipedia article, describing briefly the backup application bearing that name. Since I'm it's developer, it may not be totally objective, although I tried to be as Neutral as I could. The application is growing int terms of user base, and I thought it deserved its entry on the List of backup software page. As the software needed to have its own article to appear on the list, I created the article to.
Create Synchronicity has been written about by many sources, in many different languages. It was recently updated to version 3.0, and already appears in the French Wikipedia.
Could you please review this article? I'm pretty new to creating fully new articles.
Thanks a lot! CFP. —Preceding unsigned comment added by Cfpcompte (talk • contribs) 14:30, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Hamilton Bradshaw
User:CodyJDick/Hamilton Bradshaw
I have created a page about the UK private equity firm Hamilton Bradshaw. Here is the link to the page I have made in my userspace: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:CodyJDick/Hamilton_Bradshaw
I believe the page has the quality required to go live. However I would REALLY APPRECIATE if the page could be reviewed. I will gladly listen to suggestions and accept edits. Thanks for your time.