She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)

"She Got the Goldmine"
Song

"She Got the Goldmine (I Got the Shaft)" is a 1982 novelty song made famous by country music singer Jerry Reed. A satire on divorce, the song became Reed's third and final No. 1 country hit in the late summer of 1982, and one of his signature tunes.

Song plot

The song is a tongue-in-cheek reflection on the recent divorce of a blue-collar worker, that role being filled by the song's main protagonist. Here, the man comments about how his marriage used to have some good memories, but the lust faded from their relationship. He then admits he wasn't surprised to come home one day to learn his wife had kicked him out of their marital home (by leaving a suitcase on the porch). She also had changed the locks to the house's exterior doors, and taped a goodbye note to the mailbox; the note states, "Goodbye, turkey! My 'torney [attorney] will be in touch."

The protagonist concedes defeat, agreeing to give her "her fair share," only to learn her "fair share" is much more than he expected. The divorce settlement — as explained in the second verse — gives his now ex-wife "the color television set, the house, the kids and both of the cars." There is also the lament about how paying child support, alimony and court costs "add up to more than this turkey makes," and that while "she's livin' like a queen on alimony, I'm workin' two shifts eatin' baloney."

The ending to the song includes the remark, "Contempt of court?" — also heard in the fade out to Reed's "When You're Hot, You're Hot." Both songs end with Reed (as the main protagonist) facing a judge and attempting to get out of a criminal charge or other court-ordered commitment; in "She Got the Goldmine," the "contempt of court" statement follows an attempted joke to the judge about food stamps.

Chart performance

"She Got the Goldmine" spent two weeks at No. 1 on the Billboard Hot Country Singles chart in September 1982, and spent a total of twelve weeks on that chart's Top 40.