Talk:On Her Majesty's Secret Service (novel)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sarastro1 (talk · contribs) 22:49, 1 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I will review this in the next day or two. --Sarastro1 (talk) 22:49, 1 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"Fleming wrote the book whilst the first film in the Eon Productions series of films, Dr. No, was being filmed nearby." May be better to say where it was being written and filmed rather than leave it hanging.
"what is known as the "Blofeld trilogy", which begins with Thunderball, had an interlude with The Spy Who Loved Me and concluded with You Only Live Twice." If TSWLM is not part of the trilogy (and a trilogy should be three books, really.), perhaps leave it out here. Just because it was published between the other books does not mean the trilogy must include it. Unless I'm missing something. But it is not mentioned in the main body.
"Bond finds him thorough the College of Arms in London and, after meeting him and discovering his latest plans, attacks the centre where he is based, although Blofeld escapes in the confusion." A bit vague here: I initially read this as meaning he found him within the College of Arms, and I think it could be specified where he finds him.
"Bond also meets and marries in the story": Meets and marries who? I would also suggest framing it: "Bond meets and falls in love with X during the story. The pair marry at the end of the story but Blofeld kills Bond's wife hours after the ceremony". And I think we should name her here.
I think, per WP:LEAD, the lead section needs more from the article: the background, characters and critical reception should be covered in more detail. --Sarastro1 (talk) 21:06, 2 December 2011 (UTC)[reply]

"Tracy' to her friends": A little informal. Maybe simply add "known as Tracy" or even "(Tracy)" when she is introduced.
"the only way to save his daughter": From?
College of Arms "lead": Probably not important for the article, but how did they know that it was Blofeld? It suggests he was not so hard to find!
Grenade: The tossing of one grenade seems a little detailed for the plot section, unless I am missing its significance.

"Fleming later changed the title after being told of a nineteenth-century sailing novel seen by Fleming's friend Nicholas Henderson in Portobello Road Market.": Why? What was the book?
"Fleming did make mistakes in the novel, however, and after Bond ordered a half-bottle of Pol Roger Champagne, Fleming's friend Patrick Leigh Fermor pointed out that that it was the only champagne at the time not to be produced in half-bottles.": Not sure about the "and" here. Given that it says "mistakes" and only one is listed, either add another or perhaps say "for example".

"noted that the two minor grammatical errors he spotted "is likely to spoil no one's enjoyment": Plural errors, singular is.
"Whilst The Sunday Times said that "James Bond is what every man would like to be, and what every woman would like between her sheets",[12] the critic for The Times considered that after The Spy Who Loved Me, "On Her Majesty's Secret Service constitutes a substantial, if not quite a complete, recovery."": Not sure about whilst as it implies a contrast that is not there.
"Having said that, he sets out to argue that point anyway": A little too much like editorialising for me.
"Kirsch also believed that "with Fleming, then we do not merely accept the willing suspension of disbelief, we yearn for it, we hunger for it."": Something not quite right: "then" doesn't seem to fit.

"With the novels films in a different order to the books": Does not quite sound right.
"Even so, the previous film, You Only Live Twice, had Blofeld and Bond meeting and this was ignored for the plot of On Her Majesty's Secret Service": To clarify, this means that the film ignored the fact they met in the previous film and followed the plot of the book?