Talk:Sri Aurobindo/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Royroydeb (talk · contribs) 19:44, 12 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

"Maharshi" - It is not an English word, so its translation should be present in brackets.
"King's College, Cambridge"- in which country?
"He was imprisoned by British India"? I think "British government" or even "British" would be perfect.

RRD13 (talk) 13:37, 13 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

-"Done"- Removed the word maharshi as no original sources were found refering to him as maharshi, added king's college details , updated details of british India Shrikanthv (talk) 07:09, 14 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Early life

Who were his siblings? As far as I know he had a brother named Barin Ghosh.

-"Done" : updated Shrikanthv (talk) 07:08, 14 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Rangapur should be linked.

-"Done" : updated Shrikanthv (talk) 07:08, 14 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

RRD13 (talk) 13:42, 13 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

The sentence is hapazard. The name of her sister should be there along that of his brothers joined by and.

RRD13 (talk) 12:34, 19 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

-"Done" : reworded sentence to be more consize Shrikanthv (talk) 06:23, 21 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

England

Who took them to England?
The names of the subjects should start in capital letters and should be appropriately linked.
Please mention where St Paul's School is located.
". He also acquired some familiarity with German and Italian"- I cannot understand what it says.
Instead of K.D. Ghosh, please write "His father".

RRD13 (talk) 12:52, 19 March 2014 (UTC) -Done - added information, changed capital letters, language detials added , chanded to his father and also some vague informtion was shifterd to specific information Shrikanthv (talk) 07:15, 21 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Baroda

"working first in the Survey and Settlements department, later moving to ..." please mention the years in which he shifted his work to other departments.
The sentence sounds bad - two "works"
"prakash" - it should be capital, a name.
The poetry is in which language?

RRD13 (talk) 06:35, 20 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

-Done updated info, poetry was in English Shrikanthv (talk) 07:49, 21 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Calcutta

In the previous sections' headers' we have the dates. Why not in this case?
"repeatedly visited Bengal" - when?
How can a person be influenced by his own studies?
He helped establish a series of youth clubs. He helped found the Anushilan Samiti of Calcutta in 1902" - make it "He helped establish a series of youth clubs like the Anushilan Samiti of Calcutta in 1902"
"Congress" - Congress. (How can a casual leader know it is a political party?)
If I am not wrong the Congress meetings were held annually in a city to review the progress made. In 1906, it was held in Calcutta headed by Dadabhai Naoroji. I think it should be mentioned.
"hardliners"- isnt it extremists?

RRD13 (talk) 06:36, 24 March 2014 (UTC) Done Merged The sections of Baroda and Calcutta as it seems he was moving between cities during these days , he was was influnced by his ... changed to studies , wording corrected, hardliners changed to extremists and last statment reworded for correct picturisation of the situtaion Shrikanthv (talk) 12:14, 24 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Conversion from politics to spirituality

Why did the trial occur? How was he involved with the bombings? All these needs to be explained.
The spelling of CR Das is wrong. Moreover he should be appropriately linked.
"Afterwards" - date?
"Vivekananda"??? - "Swamiji or Swami Vivekananda"
Reword the first sentence of the third paragraph.
Again "Brahmananda".
"Bande" - "Vande" (B is used by the Bengalis not by Indians)
"Chandarnagore" - wrong spelling.

RRD13 (talk) 12:41, 24 March 2014 (UTC) Done- Most of the infor added and dates added, correct city name added and tagged to existing wiki article Shrikanthv (talk) 14:31, 24 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Pondicherry

"philosophical monthly magazine" make it "philosophical magazine published monthly".
"A series of work" - are these works articles/ poems or anything else?
Why "Sri"? What does it mean?
Where did he sign his name?
Only one sentence about his death?

RRD13 (talk) 10:45, 25 March 2014 (UTC) Done - changed most of the things added info on Sri and tagged it, did not really find where he first actually signed with sri first time, the authors only mention about first usage. expanded death details Shrikanthv (talk) 07:27, 26 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Mirra Richard

Why a level 2 heading?
She was of which nationality?
In which state is the city located?

RRD13 (talk) 10:55, 25 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Done : removed redundant aurovilla details as it was created much later by the mother and compressed the information on ashram and the mother on same para, its a union terretory so I am unable to mention it as a seperate state and city Shrikanthv (talk) 07:48, 26 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Philosophy and spiritual vision

Who is Peter Heehs?
The Life Divine section is uncited.
"Man is born an ignorant" - why capital m? It should be "man is born as an ignorant...."
Are the 3 points said by him?
There is problem with the 29 reference.
~~Savitri should be included in this section only.~~

RRD13 (talk) 09:12, 26 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Rest

In all places where any person has been named like "Abc did.." make it "(Historian) Abc....."
Is there any need for a section of quotations?
Include Savitri section in Literary works.

RRD13 (talk) 09:16, 26 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]