Lance Corporal Jones
Template:Dad's Army character Lance Corporal Jack Jones is a fictional Home Guard platoon lance-corporal and butcher portrayed by Clive Dunn in the BBC television sitcom Dad's Army.
Personality
Jones was born in 1870 in Walmington-on-Sea, and during his youth he joined the army as a drummer boy. Thereafter, he served in two military campaigns - The British Reconquest of Sudan (1896-1899), and World War I (1914-1918).
At the outbreak of World War II, Jones was retired from the army and working as a butcher, but he was so keen to join the Home Guard that, despite his age, Captain Mainwaring instantly commissioned him as the platoon's Lance Corporal. However, it is suggested that Jones' ability to provide off-the-ration meat may have had rather more to do with this decision.
In many episodes, Jones fondly recalls his time during the Battle of Omdurman in the Sudan, facing the "Fuzzy Wuzzies" under the command of General Kitchener.
Jones is known for a number of eccentric traits, such as using long rambling explanations whenever he wants to make a point. He is also invariably one step behind the rest of the platoon in any drill maneuver. He often makes far-fetched suggestions for the platoon, such as advising that they chop off the German prisoners' trouser buttons, on the grounds that if they escaped, a group of German men walking through the town with their trousers around their ankles may cause people to "raise some inquiries". Every time, Jones' suggestions are soundly refuted by Mainwaring:
- "I think you're wandering into the realms of fantasy, Jones"
Jones is well remembered for his catchphrases "Don't Panic!", "Permission to speak, Sir?", and of course - "They don't like it up 'em!", a phrase which writer Jimmy Perry remembered an old campaigner using, during his own service in the Home Guard.
In one episode, Jones has to confront his past when a former comrade from the Sudan, Private Clarke, joins the Walmington-on-Sea platoon. Clarke accuses Jones of leaving him to die many years ago, folowing an incident in which both men are attacked and kidnapped by dervishes. After Jones recounts his side of the story to the platoon, Clarke realises that he had misunderstood Jones' actions all those years ago, and that he had not been left to die after all.
Jones appears to have reasonably good relationships with both Mainwaring and Wilson, whom he often bribes with meat when he wants his own way. His main rivalries are with Frazer, and the Verger, whom he calls a troublemaker.
On informal occasions, Jones is often accompanied by Mrs Fox, his love-interest. Mrs Fox is a busty middle-aged widow, and a regular customer at Jones' butcher shop.