Talk:Patrick Agyemang

Patrick Agyemang has been listed as one of the Sports and recreation good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: July 15, 2021. (Reviewed version).

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External links modified

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Patrick Agyemang/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Harper J. Cole (talk · contribs) 12:05, 15 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take on this review, as part of the July 2021 Backlog Drive.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 12:05, 15 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

[is a former professional footballer] "...is a Ghanaian former professional footballer..."

[He was loaned out for a second time in January 2012, this time joining Stevenage on loan until the end of the 2011–12 season.] You don't need to say "on loan", having established it was a loan deal earlier in the sentence

[although briefly played for Baffins Milton Rovers and Cray Valley Paper Mills in non-League] --> "although he briefly played for non-League Baffins Milton Rovers and Cray Valley Paper Mills"

Gillingham

[two weeks later – scoring the only goal] Comma instead of a hyphen here.

Preston North End

Wikilink Lancashire

[both of Preston's play-off games – with Preston losing by] Comma instead of hyphen.

[with Preston narrowly missing out on the play-offs positions by a point] No need for "narrowly" as you say they missed out by a point, conveying the same meaning.

Queens Park Rangers

[After struggling for first-team appearances at QPR] Repetition from the previous sentence.

[He returned to the QPR team] --> "He returned to QPR"

Stevenage

[in August 20212] Typo in year.

Portsmouth

[as they ended a run of 23-games without a win] No hyphen here; "a 23-game run" would use the hyphen, as it would come before a noun.

International career

[Despite impressing in the friendly,] The cited source doesn't seem to say that he impressed - it does note his height as a possible positive.

Summary

Just a few minor issues to look at. There isn't much about this player online, and you've done good work on the article. I'll await your response to the above.--Harper J. Cole (talk) 20:45, 15 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hi @Harper J. Cole:. Thanks for taking the time out to review the article. I have made all of the suggested changes. You're correct about the cited source re: friendly, so I have added a line about Agyemang's physical presence in the match instead. SBFCEdit (talk) 21:59, 15 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Looking good! I'll promote to GA status. Thanks for the interesting read,--Harper J. Cole (talk) 23:05, 15 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]