User:Dave sykes

Dave Sykes or D H Sykes is a bald hybrid of victor meldrew and Yoda who teaches electronics. he has a fetish for pink honda jazzes but denies all knowledge of such an obsession claming "its venus metallic orange" or "ITS ME WIFES". Clearly this is a load of rubbish and he secretly desires to be the new sheila on the sheilas wheels advert. Dave is obsessed with aspects of the GCSE electronics coursework examination. namely those parts are the design brief, the specification and the task analysis. dave is obsesssed with these and has been known to repeatedly mutter them whenever he feels like it. In september 2005 dave took a job at Ryedale School teaching electronics where he was the witness to the masking tape riot of 2005. when a student threw masking tape across the room he went on the warpath saying to the student 'you cant say i havent been warning you, i watched ya do it' before proclaiming loudly the student 'Throoooooooo it.' When another student protested the suspected masking tape throwers innocence a deadly conflict began with Dave yelling to the protester that he 'wouldnt believe you if you told me his name' this immediatly stopped the conflict by confusing the class. in 2006 another riot occured when students threw inexpensive components at eachother leading to dave to go to war again, now he fears throwing of any sort and believes anone who throws anything is guilty.