User:Samayfield/Developmental toxicity/Holland1801 Peer Review
Peer review
Complete your peer review exercise below, providing as much constructive criticism as possible. The more detailed suggestions you provide, the more useful it will be to your classmate. Make sure you consider each of the following aspects: LeadGuiding questions:
ContentGuiding questions:
Tone and BalanceGuiding questions:
Sources and ReferencesGuiding questions:
OrganizationGuiding questions:
Images and MediaGuiding questions: If your peer added images or media
For New Articles OnlyIf the draft you're reviewing is for a new article, consider the following in addition to the above.
Overall impressionsGuiding questions:
Examples of good feedbackA good article evaluation can take a number of forms. The most essential things are to clearly identify the biggest shortcomings, and provide specific guidance on how the article can be improved.
Additional Resources |
General info
[edit]- Whose work are you reviewing?
Samayfield
- Link to draft you're reviewing
- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Samayfield/Developmental_toxicity?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
- Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
- Developmental toxicity
Evaluate the drafted changes
[edit]Overall there is like little to no sources, I don't know if that was just copied over from the article or something but just try to input sources wherever you can :)
Lead:
There is a sentence "The first few weeks of embryogenesis in humans" that seems out of place. It doesn't flow with what was previously being discussed in the paragraph and the sentence seems like its missing the second half of it. Maybe expand on this sentence and try to tie it into what was previously being discussed. I also think some of the information about fetal exposure during pregnancy could be added to someplace further down the article or made into a subheading all on its own.
History:
The first sentence in this section was sort of confusing, I am not sure what it is stating, maybe you could try to reword it or add to it.
Content:
The maternal irradiation section seemed a little short or like it was missing part of the topic, maybe you could expand on that part of the article a little more. The rubella and thalidomide sections seemed well written and covered the topic well.
In the testing section maybe you could describe some of the ways testing is done at the different stages or what all the testing involves and is checking for.
maybe you could also describe some toxins that lead to defects in neurulation, the other headings are all toxins that affect the fetus and this is just a heading describing a pathway that is affected in a fetus. and the endocrine disruptor and epigenetics paragraphs seems short in comparison to all the other ones maybe you could expand on those topics some more.