User talk:Street58

This user is a student editor in Northwestern_Michigan_College/English_111_First-Semester_College_Composition_(Fall_2024) .

Welcome!

Hello, Street58, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Brianda and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Brianda (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:35, 13 November 2024 (UTC)[reply]

peer review.

Peer review three, done by another student. Goodfood111 (talk) 18:41, 21 November 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Overall I think that the information you are adding to the Wikipedia page is useful and helps expand the info on the page. However, I think that your work could be organized to better fit the text. Your work seems to be written in a way that makes it seem like you are adding onto another persons work (witch you are) but I believe that if you wrote in a way that was more connected to the original text your added info would flow easier. an example of this is when you say "The following vitamins are essential to animal nutrition". you add this separate from the information provided as to why it's important. I think if you just added onto the paragraph then made the list it would look cleaner and read easier. I do agree with your proposal to delete the unimportant information, I think that the information doesn't really fit with what the text is about. I also think that instead of stating “other minerals that are important to animal nutrition”. It would probably be better to just add onto the list instead of making it separate from the original text. I also noticed that you didn't add any references to the texts that you used to get the information, while I don't doubt you are right I do think you should reference the texts you got your information from. I also think you did a good job about not stating your opinion. All together I think with a few minor tweaks it will be a great add on to the text. Have a nice break! Goodfood111 (talk) 18:25, 22 November 2024 (UTC)[reply]